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Report: Half Of All Americans Probably Should Have Thought Of That Before They Opened Their Mouth http://onion.com/1kNRbjl
[American Voices] “A live-action Lion King might be cool if the cast didn’t eat one another.” http://onion.com/1kNNKt4
"In 47 percent of our cases it didn’t even cross the subject’s mind to consider that before running their damn yap." http://onion.com/1kNMHct
Occupation: Talking point Current Location: Center of political circus http://onion.com/1kNJ0ni pic.twitter.com/TXNj9ZuEMJ
"LeBron is the most complete player we’ve ever seen." – @BillSimmons while materializing in a Lorentzian wormhole http://onion.com/1kNGPQw
Report: Half Of All Americans Probably Should Have Thought Of That Before They Opened Their Mouth http://onion.com/1kNEkOg
Man Honestly Thinks He’s Going To Get To Bed Early http://onion.com/1pIK9Eq pic.twitter.com/9Ad9urfFgR
[American Voices] “So all I have to do to get fresh deer meat is pretend I’m homeless?” http://onion.com/1pIJfYH
The Mad Men “For Your Consideration” ads are beautifully appropriate http://avc.lu/ThL5lQ
World’s Supercomputers Release Study Confirming They Are Not Powerful Enough http://onion.com/1jVN70y pic.twitter.com/bHqFhiChsw
Facebook LifePoint Lets Users Compare Friends' Awful Choices To Their Own http://onion.com/1mXsyE0 pic.twitter.com/cfvSZBboy5
Fleshlighthouse Guides Weary Sailors Home To Realistic Vaginal Texture http://onion.com/1nlKASa pic.twitter.com/1T7o8O6PgB
Bill Simmons Ventures Into Interdimensional Vortex To Find Out If LeBron James Could Dominate In Different NBA Eras http://onion.com/1nlCkS4
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