You Are Two Point Three Meters from Your Destination

Commencing Route for Orpheus of Thrace.

Proceed from Ciconian Coast meadow south–southwest to mouth of Eurotas River in Laconia, approximately eight hundred kilometers. Travel time to waypoint: seven days at your current speed.

Head ninety–two kilometers south to Cape Taenarus, also known as Matapan. Find Taenarus Gate.

Recalculating. Find Taenarus Gate. Proceed to route.

Pass into Taenarus Gate and proceed to River Styx.

A toll is required. Exact change is required.

Proceed to route. Descend five thousand kilometers to throne room. Time to destination: unknown.

Arriving at throne room. Proceed five point two meters to throne. Avoid abyss. Make your request.

Receiving new information from satellites. Calculating return trip.

Exit throne room, follow northern path to Vale of Avernus, Cicero, Italy. Approximately six thousand kilometers.

Proceed up incline. No turns are permitted on this route.

Proceed up incline. You are five hundred meters from your destination.

No turns are permitted on this route. You are one hundred meters from your destination.

You are two point three meters from your destination. Proceed up…recalculating.

Recalculating. Proceed to route.

Proceed to… No crossing of the River Styx is possible at this time.

Proceed to route. Recalculating. Proceed ahead from River Styx, approximately five thousand kilometers to mouth of Acheron River.

Calculating new destination. Proceed six hundred kilometers north–northeast through forest to Rhodope Mountains. Time to destination, five days to three years. Several drinking establishments ahead on left.

New route selected.


Fran Wilde

Fran Wilde is an author and technology consultant. Her first novel, UPDRAFT, debuts from Tor on September 1, 2015. Her short stories appear in Asimov’sBeneath Ceaseless SkiesNature, and, while her nonfiction interviews with writers appear under the banner “Cooking the Books” at, Strange Horizons, the SFWA blog, and at You can also find her on Twitter ( and Facebook (

Dan Magus

One Response to “You Are Two Point Three Meters from Your Destination”

  1. Sylvia

    Absolutely brilliant.

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