SEBASTIAN SHAKESPEARE: Harper, four, has a Posh Spice manicure and pedicure 

Undeterred by critics who said her four-year-old daughter Harper shouldn't still be using a dummy, Victoria Beckham has treated her to a manicure and pedicure.

It was no ordinary beauty treatment, of course — Harper was tended to by Tom Bachik, the celebrity nail technician responsible for Jennifer Lopez's talons.

Fashion designer Victoria shared a picture of the experience on Instagram. 'Big girl having her nails done x thank u kisses from Los Angeles,' she captioned the snap.

It is not the first time Victoria has indulged her daughter.

'I'm very girly and love nails,' she has said. 'Harper and I often have nail afternoons and when we're in LA we even send our dog to a nail spa for a paw-pedicure.'

No wonder they call it la-la land.

Harper Beckham, pictured with father David at LAX Airport, was treated to a manicure and pedicure

Harper Beckham, pictured with father David at LAX Airport, was treated to a manicure and pedicure

Harper was tended to by Tom Bachik, the celebrity nail technician responsible for Jennifer Lopez’s talons

Harper was tended to by Tom Bachik, the celebrity nail technician responsible for Jennifer Lopez's talons

 

Imran 'disgusted' by attacks on new wife 

Imran Khan has only been married a matter of months to former BBC weather girl Reham Khan and already party politics has come between them.

Last week she attended a rally for his party's Pakistan Movement For Justice and called on people to give her a 'gift' by voting for a candidate nominated by the 62-year-old former cricket star. 

Alas, the politician received a humiliating drubbing at the polls and Reham, 42, was subsequently abused on social media and blamed for the defeat. Imran, who has two teenage sons by his first wife Jemima Goldsmith, visited the constituency and encouraged Reham to campaign there because she was born in the region before moving to Britain to marry Dr Ijaz Rehman, with whom she split after having three children.

'I am appalled and disgusted by the attacks on Reham after our loss,' said Imran. 'In future, she will not attend any event.' Chivalry or chauvinism?

 

Rod's tangled family tree 

Rod Stewart is as renowned for his progeny as much as his back catalogue of leggy blondes.

The singer has had eight children by five different mothers, which can make family holidays a tad complicated.

Here he is on vacation in Hawaii with Ruby, his 28-year-old daughter by Texan model Kelly Emberg, and Liam, 20, and Renee, 23, his two children by his second wife Rachel Hunter. Rod, 70, started dating Emberg while he was still married to his first wife Alana.

Here Rod Stewart is on vacation in Hawaii with Ruby, his 28-year-old daughter by Texan model Kelly Emberg, and Liam, 20, and Renee, 23, his two children by his second wife Rachel Hunter

Here Rod Stewart is on vacation in Hawaii with Ruby, his 28-year-old daughter by Texan model Kelly Emberg, and Liam, 20, and Renee, 23, his two children by his second wife Rachel Hunter

The pair spent six years together before Rod ditched her in favour of Hunter.

Good to see the children getting on, as it wasn't always so harmonious between Rod's exes. Hunter once blasted Emberg over her failed £19 million palimony suit for 'giving blondes a bad name'.

 

As David Cameron was sunning himself on the Algarve, I hear he had the painters and decorators into his office in Downing Street. Thankfully, no pricey refurb a la Derry Irvine, who while Lord Chancellor decked out his grace-and-favour residence in £59,000 of hand-printed wallpaper at our expense. 

A No 10 spokesman says the men were just carrying out 'annual maintenance work', which takes place every year while the PM is on his hols. Upon moving into Downing Street, the Camerons caused a stir when they spent £30,000 (out of their own pocket) on a swanky new kitchen. 

 

'Leggings should be illegal for certain people. There should be a 'leggings police'. Only a certain body shape can pull them off.'

Reubenesque Kirstie Allsopp

'My wife tells me I look more and more like Steptoe Senior every time she looks at me.'

Gyles Brandreth

'I burp loudly in public places. A waitress actually told me off the other day.'

Model Poppy Delevingne

'I can't bloody stand cyclists. I'm sick to death of Bradley f*****g Wiggins. Everyone thinks that all the country lanes are the Tour de France!'

T'Pau singer Carol Decker 

 

A lucky escape for F1 heiress Tamara Ecclestone's brother-in-law George Rutland, who was spared a nasty spell in pokey yesterday.

Rutland, 24, brother of Tamara's uber-vulgar hubby Jay, admitted causing actual bodily harm last March when he 'bottled' a fellow reveller in London nightclub Bodo's Schloss. By chance, the Alpine-themed haunt, a favourite of Prince Harry, is just a short hop from his brother's £70 million marital home in Kensington.

Rutland, who was drunk and high on cannabis at the time, was given a four-month suspended sentence by the judge and ordered to do 120 hours of unpaid work.

Rutland, 24, brother of Tamara's uber-vulgar hubby Jay, admitted causing actual bodily harm last March when he 'bottled' a fellow reveller in London nightclub Bodo's Schloss
Rutland, 24, brother of Tamara's uber-vulgar hubby Jay, admitted causing actual bodily harm last March when he 'bottled' a fellow reveller in London nightclub Bodo's Schloss

Rutland, 24, brother of Tamara's uber-vulgar hubby Jay, admitted causing actual bodily harm last March when he 'bottled' a fellow reveller in London nightclub Bodo's Schloss

 

Finding a fitting tribute to the late Sir Patrick Moore is proving to be an astronomical headache.

Plans to commemorate the acclaimed stargazer with an observatory near his West Sussex home in Selsey have, like a comet's tail, completely fizzled out.

Sir Patrick, who died in 2012 aged 89, was the presenter of the world's longest-running television series, the BBC's The Sky At Night.

But a feasibility study by the Selsey Coastal Trust has found that the proposed observatory is sadly unviable.

Town council chairman Mike Beal says: 'My view on this is that the last thing Sir Patrick Moore would have wanted was a statue or plaque, because that's not doing anything.

'He was a man who did stuff, which is why the coastal trust was looking at the observatory, as an active memorial.'

 

Former Tory education minister George Walden has dubbed the Labour leadership battle 'a Lowry election' after the painter of matchstick men and dogs. 'Why is the Labour leadership election like a Lowry painting?' he asks. 'Because the stick figures are lifeless, the background archaic, the colours drab and, like the artist, the leading candidate is wildly over-rated.'

 

Mentioning no names...

Which former male royal consort is wont to return to his host's restaurant table after lunch to filch the tip intended for the waiter? 

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