So my big girl is now in year 1! The Crocs slightly ruin the look - we're going to the shoe shop after school to get her regulation black shoes!
I just want to say a big well done to all the parents with school-age children for getting through the school holidays - six weeks is a long gap to fill both when you are working and if you are a stay at home mum! As one of the mums said to me today, 'It sort of flew by and really dragged all at the same time'.
I've had an awful day at work. So tonight I am trying to be jolly - here are my reasons to be cheerful:
Monty is sleeping much better now that he has his big, snuggy single duvet.
Since my post yesterday about mess and chaos I've had lots of messages from friends and strangers who are in the same boat. It's reassuring to know that I am not the only one limping to the end of the summer holidays, with a house that looks like a jumble sale who hasn't brought their child's new school shoes yet. Thanks guys!
Today I did buy Minnie some new trainers for PE. We are getting there, slowly.
I am looking forward to taking M & M to see Inside Out at the weekend - think we are amongst the minority who haven't seen it yet. Even my boss at work has been to see it and his kids are in their 20s!
Monty has his first swimming lesson on Friday - I can't wait to see how it goes.
My mum has offered to have the children on Saturday afternoon so we can clear up a bit. James is threatening a car boot sale on Sunday. If I can refrain from buying as much as we sell it will be marvellous.
My mum will tell me off for sharing these pics but I feel it's my duty to all the other mums out there who are struggling to keep on top of things at home...
The dining room table, which has become a dumping ground for coats, bags and junk as we walk through the house.
Hidden behind the dining room table, is this disaster. We had a pipe leak months back and I did get some quotes for replacement floorboards but still haven't got around to deciding who to use.
This is meant to be the kitchen table and playroom. But it's currently strewn with toys, toy babies and camping gear which we are drying out after our wet weekend. And this is only downstairs - upstairs is just as bad if not worse.
My book Small Talk: Simple ways to boost your child's speech and language development from birth, is available from Amazon now. Please visit and subscribe to the Small Talk YouTube Channel
Minnie terrorises the Feastival VIP tent with giant bubbles
Monty rocks out to The Feeling
We spent Saturday in Cambridge with James's family, went to our local pub with friends Saturday night, headed to Feastival (the food and music festival run by Jamie Oliver and Alex James) with the children to camp first thing on Sunday. They were so excited about staying in a tent and they couldn't get enough of the bubble shop or the old-fashioned rides. James and I enjoyed the food (great burgers at Bun!) and the live music - my unexpected highlight was Sophie Ellis Bextor who sung two tracks with The Feeling - can you believe that the Groovejet track is 12 years old?!
It was fab but we came back this morning wet, cold and rather muddy after all the rain overnight. And in rather a panic about all the jobs we didn't get done over the weekend because we were too busy.
- My biggest concern... We didn't get to Clark's to get Minnie's feet measured to see if she needs new school shoes. I did try and go to the Thame branch today but think they shut at 3pm so I just missed them. I am now at work for the rest of the week so we may have to go after school on Friday afternoon, the first day of term (very poor organisation).
- Minnie and Monty both need a haircut. Again, I will be at work and I don't really like asking other people to take them to the hairdressers. One for next weekend.
- I have tried to sort out Minnie's uniform for her return to school on Friday, and have bought two new dresses from M&S as her other grey ones are aged 4-5 and are getting a bit short. One is the same as she has now but they only had one of these so I had to get another one with buttons that she may not be able to do up herself. They didn't have any of the red checked summer dresses aged 5-6 in stock - and there's always a heatwave in September. She will just have to wear her existing ones if necessary. I must get ahead of the uniform rush next year.
- I can't find Minnie's black PE sweatshirt anywhere.
- Today I found a new red book in Minnie's school bag that is blank. She at first told me she was meant to have kept a journal over the holidays. Then when I said (in panic), 'Well you'd better do some writing in it about our camping trip!' she claimed that it was for use in her new class. I will have to text my friend Monica (the font of all school-related wisdom, every working mum needs a Monica) to find out what's what. And we may be spending all week belatedly writing our summer holiday diary! Another black mark for mummy!
Monty shares his pirate skills during the storytelling session in the gloriously colourful Pan tent
Monty was so proud of the tent (and the fact that he and Minnie had their own bedroom in it) that he asked me to take this picture
I woke up in the early hours of the morning to find him in bed with us and told James off for putting him in our bed (I have really strict rules about it and only let them do this if they are poorly as I know too many friends who have allowed kids into their beds then been unable to get them out) but it turns out that he snuck in all by himself while we slumbered.
So today I have commenced Operation: Making Monty's Bed As Snuggy As Possible. I've bought him a proper single bed duvet (he currently still has his cot-sized one) and I have bought him two sets of new bedlinen from Zara Home. I am actually so excited about it - they are both cartoon/superhero based and I think he is going to love them. The poor thing has had Minnie's pink cast-offs for far too long so now he'll finally have a proper boy's bed. Surely he won't want to leave it at 5am to join us?
On Sunday we had our lovely friends Helen and Mark over who run Gorgeous Giggles, and have two gorgeous daughters Amy (5) and Emily, 18 months. Helen mentioned that she was a bit concerned about Emily's speech and could do with some Small Talk advice. Emily has tongue and lip tie and could only say, 'hiya' and 'dodo' - both used seemingly to refer to everything. However, Helen explained that her understanding was very good and by the way Emily was pointing and gabbling away, it was clear that she was really trying to communicate, too.
I told Helen to concentrate on the all-important Say What You See Technique - providing a running commentary describing Emily's play. This way she hears the words in the correct context and will hopefully soon attempt to say them herself.
I also said it was all about repetition, as well as using words in context, and showed her this video showing the genesis of Monty's first word, cat.
So because Emily was playing with a pram and kept wanting to get up the steps in our garden, I suggested we start saying up a lot. 'Up? Up the steps?' 'Buggy up, Emily up!' We did the same when she raised her arms asking to be lifted up by her mum or dad. 'Up? Up to mummy, up you come!'
I was thrilled to get a text the very next day to say that Emily had started saying 'up', clearly and in the right context!
So Helen, two more suggestions... Emily was clearly quite keen on the blue football she found at our house. You could try playing ball with her and repeating the word ball lots, so whenever she points at it or picks it up or even shows interest say, 'Ball! Yes, a ball. Let's play ball!'
Also give her a choice so she has a reason to communicate, so perhaps hold up a ball and a car and say, 'Ball or car?' and look at her encouragingly. Tune in to her language, her first attempts to say ball might be, 'Bah, bah' - so encourage her along with lots of smiles.
Secondly, how about a dada or a mama? A fun way to encourage this, that Amy could join in with, is to all sit on the sofa. Send daddy out of the room, then say, 'Daddy! Where's Daddy gone? Daddy!' Have fun all calling for Daddy, then get Mark to theatrically burst through the door. Cue 'Daddy! there's Daddy! Hiya Daddy!' Then send him out again, 'bye daddy!' and play again. Do this a few times and I'll bet Emily will start attempting a 'Dah! Dah!'
My book Small Talk: Simple ways to boost your child's speech and language development from birth, is available from Amazon now. Please visit and subscribe to the Small Talk YouTube Channel for more friendly talking tips to get your cheeky monkeys chatting
Nightmares, Night Terrors or Something Else? The term ‘night terrors’ or sleep terrors can be thrown around a bit too easily when often it is actually a nightmare, a bad dream or a confusional arousal that your child is having. I have many parents ask me about night terrors but true night terrors are rarely seen in a child under the age of six years. They are more likely to occur in the preadolescent and adolescent years.
So what is happening when your child has an upset waking in the night? Let’s take a look at these different occurrences so that you can identify them properly. Confusional events, known as parasomnias, include night terrors, sleepwalking, sleep talking and confusional arousals. These occur when the awake and sleep systems are trying to function simultaneously, like a battle between the waking system trying to activate and the sleep system not giving in to it. What we see when this happens is a child who demonstrates signs of being awake and of being asleep, at the same time. We looked at baby sleep cycles on page 16 and how young children transition through non-REM and REM sleep. There are four stages of NREM sleep before REM sleep occurs. These four stages are: Stage one: Transitioning from awake to asleep Stage two: Light sleep Stage three: Sleep deepens Stage four: Deepest sleep takes place
Confusional events always take place during a partial waking from NREM sleep, before the transition to REM sleep and usually between one to four hours after falling asleep (often within the first two hours). So it is likely to be during the first or second sleep cycle of the night. They are quite common and, up to the age of five or six years, these confusional events are considered to be developmental because they reflect the maturing sleep system in a child. You may notice some calm sleepwalking, sleep talking, or even getting up and seeming irritated but disorientated. These can all occur to different extents of calm or upset. Confusional arousals are very often mistaken for night terrors.
These are some symptoms of a child having a confusional arousal: • Thrashing his body • Saying ‘no, no, no’ or ‘get off ’ or ‘go away’ or similar • Lashing out • Crying out • Upset • Disorientated/Confused • Cross/Angry • Appears to be awake – eyes are open • Looks right through you or doesn’t recognise you • Can be further irritated by your attempts to comfort him and may push you away • Unlikely to respond to your questions • Can seem frantic but not terrified
When children say alarming things such as ‘no, no!’ or ‘stop it’ during a confusional arousal this is nothing to worry about. It is coming from automatic vocal triggers in low areas of the brain and not from any areas that control waking or unconscious thoughts or anxieties. Several demonstrations of confused arousal can occur in succession separated by just a few minutes of sleep before a calm and sustained sleep returns.
What should you do? Don’t try to wake your child as this is more likely to make things worse than better. Monitor him to make sure he is not going to hurt himself during the episode. If you feel you need to be with him, sit by his side and off er reassuring, calm whispers but be prepared to be shouted at or ignored as you may just become part of the confusion. He might talk nonsense to you but is unlikely to find any comfort in anything you say to him. All you can really do is wait for the episode to pass. If they are up and out of bed, you can tell him or gently guide him back to bed and perhaps remain in the room quietly until the episode passes and he goes back to sleep. Nightmares: A nightmare is a very scary dream that wakes you up and leaves you feeling frightened. This begins as a normal dream but towards the end it turns scary. These, like all dreams, occur during REM sleep when the brain is more active and they are often forgotten. They are only remembered if there was a brief waking at the end of the dream or nightmare. How can you help? Younger children cannot distinguish a dream from reality until they are at least two years old so trying to reassure an under two-year-old with words like ‘it was just a dream’ is not going to help. Instead, you should off er comfort and reassurance by holding and hugging and soothing to calm your child down. From the age of two years upwards reassuring words will help and listening to what they have to say if they want to tell you about it, will also off er comfort and compassion. At around three - four years old you can remind your child that it was just a dream and she will be able to understand this concept but still listen and empathise rather than dismiss it. At any age, your child might take comfort from having a night light on so she can see around the room or having the bedroom door left open somewhat to feel more connected with the rest of the house and you. Your child will have woken up feeling genuinely scared so it is important to off er comfort and security and not to be too strict. Confusional events are often linked to over tiredness. Perhaps from a late night or just a lack of sleep in the sleep tank that has built up. A few early nights or getting enough nap time could significantly reduce the chances of these occurring.
The Sleep Nanny System™ by Lucy Shrimpton is out now, available from Amazon priced £8.99.
Monty has been sleeping terribly. Thursday night was horrendous - as soon as I went up to bed at 10.30pm he started screaming from, I think, a bad dream, and then he only settled for an hour or so before crying again, and so it went on. Then, probably because I'd been up and down so many times, when he finally dropped off for a few hours I couldn't go back to sleep. Grrrr!
So I was frankly rather dreading trekking into London on Friday to meet up with my old work colleague Sarah (who now works at Red Magazine) and her two girls, Coco, the same age as Monty, and Sylvie, just 10 weeks. When lovely Sarah texted to tell me she'd had four hours sleep and would be needing coffee and cake I was very relieved, as Sarah said, 'we can be delirious together!'
Luckily for me, Sarah is something of a marvellous organiser and I'd really recommend what we did. Us three travelled in on the train then took the tube to Knightsbridge (now that we don't take a pram this was actually quite manageable, even though I was outnumbered!). We took the Hyde Park exit, walked through some fancy buildings by the Candy brothers, crossed the road (at which point the Household cavalry trooped past which was rather fabulous and so London, I felt like a tourist!) into the Park and turned to the left the find the little play park Sarah had suggested we meet in. It was lovely - small, fenced in, with lots of stuff for the big ones and the small ones. And, most importantly, there was a coffee shop for that cake and coffee.
We'd met at 10.30 but by 11.45 it was starting to get busy, with a couple of nursery classes arriving to play. This was our cue to leave so we left to wander for five minutes (actually, it probably took us 10 as we had to stop and look at all the geese and swans) over to the café at the Serpentine for an early lunch. There were loads of picnic tables free, right by the Serpentine, and the café served excellent wood-fired pizzas served on wooden boards. The children amused themselves throwing the crusts into the water for the ducks and playing with colouring and sticker books, and we actually did manage to catch up about life as mums of two.
I must say it was a wonderful way to spend a morning. And we were home by 2.30pm. I think I should brave London with the children more often. But only if Sarah T plans the itinerary!
My book Small Talk: Simple ways to boost your child's speech and language development from birth, is available from Amazon now. Please subscribe to the Small Talk YouTube Channel for friendly talking tips to get your cheeky monkey chatting
This press release from Emirates just landed and I thought it had some interesting tips - including boarding the flight last to minimise your child's time on the plane!
When booking your flights:
Look to time your flights with your child’s daily routine - if possible, try and time your flight times to suit with your baby/ child’s daily routine. For instance:
DON’T opt for a middle-of-the-night departure thinking your kids will sleep through. They invariably won’t and you’ll be doubly exhausted
DO try to plan a flight to fit in between meal times or naps as this can help reduce the chance of public tantrums
Choose your seats wisely – if you can, always book your baby a bassinette or choose bulkhead seats (these have no seat in front of them so that no one can recline into your space, enabling your children to have more room to play)
Select children’s meals – don’t forget to opt for children’s meals when booking your tickets.
Before boarding:
Go sugar- free with your children’s travel snacks – sugar-free sweets are great for take-off and landing to help reduce the pressure on their ears plus also means that they will not grow increasingly hyperactive and disrupt other passengers
Allow your children to bring their own carryon bag with a couple of toys - This makes your child feel more grown up and adds to the excitement of the complete travel experience
Board the plane last – whilst many airlines offer families priority boarding, many parents in fact prefer to board last to minimise the amount of time their baby/small child spends on the plane. Many parents want their small child to burn up as much energy as possible in the airport/airport lounge so that when they are strapped in their bassinet or seat they are ready to sleep
Whilst onboard
Introduce your children to nearby passengers - When boarding your flight, introduce your children to surrounding passengers so that they are aware that you have young children and appreciate that you have everything in hand
Inflight Entertainment - Allow your children to spend a lot of time enjoying the in-flight entertainment. By giving your children license to watch more television/ films than usual, it will seem like a treat and will give you time to relax and unwind too. Also if all the family listen to the same radio channels/play the same games on ICE it makes the flight more inclusive and engaging
Toys: No matter how old your child is, you should never underestimate the power of a new toy. A new distraction presented at the right moment can work wonders.
Utilise the Cabin Crew - The Cabin Crew are on hand to make your flight as enjoyable as possible. They can help with warming bottles, keeping baby food refrigerated, offering kids activities, holding meals until a convenient time and maybe even sneaking a glass of wine to you after your child finally falls asleep.
The children were up til 10pm last night and slept in til 8.30am this morning. Luckily my mum offered to come over so I didn't have to wake them to catch the 8.44am train. I have til next Tuesday to get them back on track with sleeping and getting up, or I am going to have one hell of a battle getting Monty to nursery on time and Minnie to summer camp (we are trying this for a few days next week!). And to think the time difference to Spain is only an hour!
Just going through my holiday photos and I found this lovely one of Monty. He is a funny eccentric boy, he found this old red shuttlecock in the house, said it was his fairy and then carried it everywhere. It now has a new life in Buckinghamshire!