'It feels like you are on the edge of the world': The Pub Landlord comedian Al Murray finds an oasis of calm and lives like a Sultan on a Marrakech city break

  •  A labyrinth of balmy riads, La Sultana offered a tranquil stay enhanced by numerous spa treatments at hammam 
  •  Comedian took an 'urban safari' through the Red City discovering the best souks, markets and restaurants to enjoy
  •  Murray visited the must-see main square of Jemaa el-Fnaa and saw how the Moroccan city transforms at night

City breaks eh? Perhaps you're considering popping across to Paris, or a long weekend in Prague. But in all honesty the Eiffel Tower follows you around Paris like the Eye of Sauron, and Prague – well, all I can remember of Prague was an Irish bar and an M&S. 

Or maybe you fancy Berlin, but the problem with Berlin is it's an infinite onion of a place and you'd have to visit it every weekend for five years to get a handle on it. 

That's not what I want from a city break: I want relaxation, stimulus and a short enough journey home so as not to make returning to the real world too big a wrench. 

Which is why when the chance came up to head to Marrakech after 10 hectic days at the Edinburgh Fringe I jumped at it. 

La Sultana in Marrakech comprises a balmy labyrinth of connecting riads with each courtyard connecting a pool or garden

La Sultana in Marrakech comprises a balmy labyrinth of connecting riads with each courtyard connecting a pool or garden

Ambient break out spaces such as this balcony overlooking a courtyard are ideal for refreshments during the day and sundowners later

Ambient break out spaces such as this balcony overlooking a courtyard are ideal for refreshments during the day and sundowners later

After all, the flight time is about the same as the train journey from Edinburgh to London; the world gets ever smaller.

We stayed at La Sultana, a calm and tranquil place that I could happily disappear into for a long weekend, longer week or a month of Sundays. Off a street by the city wall, La Sultana is inconspicuous. 

Yet as the name suggests one lives like a Sultan, it's a labyrinth of balmy riads, conjoined but not overlapping, each a courtyard around a pool or a garden. Our suite was spacious, comfortable, and was very private, secluded too. 

The hotel was busy but you seldom ran into anyone much. Though we were in the heart of the kasbah section of Marrakech the most striking thing is the quiet, you'd never know you were in the city except when on the rooftop sunbathing or drinking cocktails and the odd moped beep reaches you. 

Inside the riad even your footsteps seem to land softly. 

La Sultana's spa has hammam treatments that include dowsing, soaping, exfoliating, rubbing, pummelling, oiling and kneading

La Sultana's spa has hammam treatments that include dowsing, soaping, exfoliating, rubbing, pummelling, oiling and kneading

The hotel is somewhere you'd be forgiven for not venturing beyond, but the Red City is somewhere for exploring, best of all by foot rather than in one of the many cream Mercedes taxis; these were lined up in such vast numbers they resembled a burgeoning Top Gear stunt. 

The city is all on one level – nothing may be built taller than the minarets – and everything is clad in terracotta to reduce the sunshine's glare.

Every photo you take comes back bathed in this light like the hippest Instagram filter. 

Eating dinner on our first night in La Sultana's excellent restaurant we watched the sunset, an ochre gloaming, one of those views that makes your heart leap at the wonder of cheap air travel (I'm not much of a romantic at heart).

La Sultana is the kind of hotel where nothing is too much trouble, where beds mysteriously turn themselves down, where wine glasses refill themselves and there is simply no need to be anywhere else or wonder what day it is. 

A minaret in the background and Moroccan style architectural flourishes create a decadent feel when staying at the hotel

A minaret in the background and Moroccan style architectural flourishes create a decadent feel when staying at the hotel

The hotel also boasts a Hamman or spa. Or maybe both. I didn't want to argue. 

Led into another courtyard around a pool, this one ornately tiled and fluttering with the light of the water we were solemnly instructed to relax. An hour and three quarters of dowsing, soaping, exfoliating, rubbing, pummelling, oiling and kneading followed. 

While I fear they may have scraped off what I had managed by way of a suntan, I have never felt so utterly blissed out. You can see why maybe ancient sultans ran to lives of indolence and hedonism if this is how they lived. I also heard tell of a gym.

Marrakech is a city that faces four ways: Europe, Africa, the Atlantic and Mecca, so: Crumbling Renaults, Berber traders, delicious seafood and the muezzins' call to prayer vie for your attention. 

The high ceilings and intricate design aesthetic made Murray feel as though he were living like a sultan for his weekend escape

The high ceilings and intricate design aesthetic made Murray feel as though he were living like a sultan for his weekend escape

Oasis of calm: A cooling respite from the hectic Red City

Oasis of calm: A cooling respite from the hectic Red City

Our guide who took us on a fascinating urban safari (sans wildlife) said that Moroccans essentially like to keep their heads down, it's bad for business.  

You get the sense that Marrakech does its own thing and is content to do so, even while having a good part of the world pass through.

It also used to be a city that was a hippy magnet – and while you might get the occasional aromatic waft of what drew the hippies here I can happily report not having seen any longhairs or dropouts during my stay.

It's a short walk into the centre of the city. Morocco is a former French protectorate, and the French spoken here is not unlike my O level French, half-remembered and from long ago. 

It makes for a softer tone and, while everyone speaks some English, a nice change. 

Food – like Marrakech – looks in all directions: skewers of meat, grilled chicken, pizzas, salade nicoise and ubiquitous chips is what you'll get in the bigger brasseries in the city centre. 

Service once you are out and about might best be described as having an intermittent fault, like one of those lights on your dashboard that goes on and off. 

You should tip even though you might wonder why you're bothering. Street food – well, you're advised to eat with your right hand, not use the cutlery, bring your own water and hope for the best.

I am a coward about street food for reasons no reader wishes to learn. 

The main square, Jemaa el-Fnaa, is a must see. It sits in view of the city's tallest tower, the minaret of the Koutoubia Mosque, and before the labyrinth of souk alleys and trading streets and covered markets. 

In the morning it's quiet, you can buy fresh pressed orange juice for next to nothing while urchins try to sell you tissues.

A positive 'no' is a useful tool in Marrakech, whether someone is trying to sell you tissues or the hand-woven rug of inevitability.  

There are plenty of gents – and it's always gents – selling knock off hand-bags and other tat but no more than on some stretches of Oxford Street or the Champs Elysees.

Later in the day the square fills up with the Morocco of my hackneyed imagination and possibly yours: snake charmers, drummers, pipers, dancers, monkeys on chains. Photograph any of these if you like but they'll expect a tip.

The streets of Marrakech fill with families and mopeds and crowds keen to sample the city's food stalls and restaurants

The streets of Marrakech fill with families and mopeds and crowds keen to sample the city's food stalls and restaurants

At night the city turns into somewhere else altogether, the streets in Marrekech fill with families, even more mopeds, and the crowds throng towards Jemaa el-Fnaa, now dense with people as barbecue smoke billows from the coals in the dozens of stalls selling food. 

As you walk through the stalls – all basically identical, their wares laid out for you to see – young men badger you to pick their stall to eat at. 

Their English has been spruced up with idiom: 'Lovely jubbly guv'nor!' 'London innit!' 'Hallo scousers!'. That last one was odd. 

This might be overwhelming if you're not keen on crowds and these restaurant front-men are very pushy, but they do actually take no for an answer so be sure to say no if you want to. With all the stalls being identical it's not easy to choose which one to give your custom. 

'Every photo you take comes back bathed in this light like the hippest Instagram filter,' says Murray
Al Murray found an oasis of calm in Morocco

'Every photo you take comes back bathed in this light like the hippest Instagram filter,' says Murray(pictured right) as demonstrated (left)

Somehow we picked a stall, we ate at no. 67 – it's opposite another place called Chez Mohamed – skewers of meat, we dared ourselves to eat the fish, some couscous and grilled vegetables and I'm happy to relate that this meal passed without crisis or consequence. 

After our supper a wander around the square offered people singing and drumming in circles, playing games, skittles, and monkeys on chains into the night. So near the Atlas Mountains it does feel a little like you are on the edge of the world.

So returning to the riad at La Sultana to drink Moroccan wine – I've sampled several and they all seemed to be lighter varieties but don't take my word for it – and sit on the rooftop away from the hurly-burly was the perfect end to the evening. 

As cool evening winds blew in, the ever attentive staff brought us blankets to keep us warm, embodying the sanctuary the hotel offers its guests. Would a long weekend be too short a stay? Possibly but the languid hours spent by the pool, with time standing still, might argue with you.

 

Al Murray, as alter ego The Pub Landlord, has extended his critically acclaimed, sell-out stand up tour, One Man, One Guv'nor. www.thepublandlord.com 

 

Al Murray is best know for his TV alter ego The Pub Landlord and is a critically acclaimed stand up comedian

Al Murray is best know for his TV alter ego The Pub Landlord and is a critically acclaimed stand up comedian

 

TRAVEL FACTS

Room rates at La Sultana start from 3100 MAD (approx. £210) per night based on two people sharing. 

http://lasultanahotels.com/ 

British Airways fly from London Gatwick to Marrakech, Morocco