Things I've Said To My Children author Nathan Ripperger's hilarious poster-like book

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Nathan Ripperger started taking note of absurd things he'd said in 2010
Iowa-based artist shared comical graphics on blog, which went viral
Released book called Things I've Said To My Children featuring 80 phrases
Have you said bizarre things to your kids? Email femail@mailonline.co.uk

By Sarah Barns For Mailonline

Published: 06:08 EST, 22 September 2015 | Updated: 09:57 EST, 22 September 2015

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Have you ever noticed yourself saying some very strange but hilarious things to your children?

Father-of-five Nathan Ripperger has collated all the amusing phrases he's muttered to his young sons and turned them into a comical poster-like book called Things I've Said To My Children.

The Iowa-based graphic designer's funny outbursts include 'Did you put syrup on the dog?' and 'Honey, please don't lick the toaster.'

Father-of-five Nathan Ripperger has collated all the amusing phrases he's muttered to his young sons and turned them into a comical poster-like book called Things I've Said To My Children

Surprised by the absurd things that kept coming out of his mouth, proud parent Mr Ripperger began writing down the things he said to his boys - who are all under the age of 10 - in 2010.

Offering a charming glimpse into daily life in the Ripperger household, he started making illustrations that capture the moments and posted them to his Flickr account in 2014.

'It seems like I am constantly telling my children not to lick things. Or touch things,' he told America's Today.

Surprised by the absurd things that kept coming out of his mouth, proud parent Mr Ripperger began writing down the things he said to his boys - who are all under the age of 10 - in 2010

Offering a charming glimpse into daily life in the Ripperger household, he started making illustrations that capture the moments and posted them to his Flickr account in 2014

Mr Ripperger and his wife are parents to Noah, nine, Owen, six, Micah, four and three-year-old Liam. They have recently welcomed their fifth son

'When going to the grocery store, I am telling my boys to stop touching the pickles, the mayonnaise, the stop dancing with the bread.'

The artist and video producer received a hugely positive response from other parents so he decided to put 80 of the funniest, weirdest and most amusing sayings into a book.

He added: 'When you're a parent, after a while the absurdity just washes over you.

'That's the hardest part about parenting for me - to not let yourself be so caught up with your day-to-day business of life and really just enjoy the time with your children.'

The artist and video producer received a hugely positive response from other parents so he decided to put 80 of the funniest, weirdest and most amusing sayings into a book

Laugh-out-loud phrases include: 'Why is their a toilet seat on my coffee table?' and 'Stop eating cake out of the garbage, you've already brushed your teeth'

Mr Ripperger and his wife with their brood including sons Noah, Owen, Micah, Liam and their new arrival

Things I've Said To My Children by Nathan Ripperger is published by Ten Speed Press, an imprint of Penguin Random House LLC

Laugh-out-loud phrases include: 'Why is their a toilet seat on my coffee table?' and 'Stop eating cake out of the garbage, you've already brushed your teeth.'

Meanwhile other giggle-inducing featured in the book are: 'I am not talking to you until you are wearing underwear', 'We don't eat dinner with our toes' and 'Stop riding that penguin. We're leaving!'

Mr Ripperger and his wife are parents to Noah, nine, Owen, six, Micah, four and three-year-old Liam. They have recently welcomed their fifth son.

Things I've Said To My Children by Nathan Ripperger is published by Ten Speed Press, an imprint of Penguin Random House LLC. It is available to buy now.