The A-Z of love: This week, W is for wedding

James Kerr and Matthew Johnstone celebrate the A-Z of love. This week, W is for wedding.

It's the big day: white taffeta, a beautiful bouquet and  a gorgeous cake. It’s all you’ve ever wanted — your dream wedding. Now it’s time to get real.
Too many couples spend ages planning the wedding, yet don’t invest time in planning their marriage.

The best wedding gift you can give each other is to be prepared. And that starts with a heart-to-heart . . . 

Marathon not a sprint: Marriages need time to work

Marathon not a sprint: Marriages need time to work

Vision: How do you see yourselves in a year or two, or ten? Children? Careers? China? Before you wonder: ‘Where this is going?’ agree where you want to take it. A clear vision can help you see problems before they arise.

Values: A couple who value the same things will be more likely to keep valuing each other. Setting common core values is not necessarily easy but makes all the difference.

Ground Rules: Make love, not assumptions. Do you both believe in monogamy? Or are you open to other things? Who will buy the bread? And who will be the breadwinner? Who will care for the children? And the finances? Ground rules are the foundation for the future.

Growth: It takes two healthy people to make a healthy relationship so give each other room to breathe, socialise, play golf, sleep . . . whatever. Marriage is a marathon — pace yourself.