Now it's DADS who can't juggle work and kids! Modern fathers found to be just as prone to 'burning out' as they juggle childcare, domestic chores and their job 

  • Fathers struggle to juggle work and family as much as mothers
  • Modern Families Index reveals both are more prone to 'burning out' 
  • Younger parents 'more likely to share care than previous generations' 

Fathers are now finding it as difficult as mothers to juggle work and family, a report has revealed.

Modern parents are more likely to share childcare, domestic chores and work – but this has led to both being more prone to ‘burn out’.

The Modern Families Index found four out of five younger parents – men and women aged under 36 – worked full time, compared to half of parents of all ages.

Fathers find juggling work and family as difficult as mothers do, according to a new report (file picture)

Fathers find juggling work and family as difficult as mothers do, according to a new report (file picture)

Fathers of this ‘millennial’ age group were also more likely to have adapted work around looking after children, with more than two thirds working flexibly compared to half of fathers aged over 45.

But more than two in five ‘millennial parents’ said they felt burn out most or all of the time, compared to one in five parents aged 36 to 45 and one in six aged over 45.

They were also most likely to say they would rather take a pay cut for a better work/life balance and less likely to be attracted to progressing in their careers if it meant working longer hours and being away from family.

Four in ten fathers aged 35 and under resented their employers, compared to three in ten overall, but three out of five would not feel confident asking their boss to reduce their hours, allow remote working or cut down on the amount of calls and emails they take outside of work.

Nearly a third of parents of all ages said they felt burnt out often or all the time, according to the report compiled by campaign charity Working Families and childcare provider Bright Horizons.

Half of 1,000 parents surveyed said their working life was becoming increasingly stressful and more than a third said this impacted negatively on family life.

Around a third of parents said they had taken annual leave or sick leave to cope with juggling family commitments or feeling burnt out.

Despite fathers becoming increasingly more involved, mothers were nearly twice as likely to consider whether a new job would work around their childcare responsibilities.

CITY DAD WHO REDUCED HIS HOURS BECAUSE HE NEVER SAW HIS CHILDREN

After Adrian Dyer’s son was born in 2009, he barely saw him. He returned to his job in the City after just two weeks paternity leave and was unable to help his wife Katariina out with household chores.

‘I wasn’t really seeing my son from Monday to Friday,’ he said. ‘It wasn’t enough. It caused a bit of stress because I wasn’t helping at home and my wife was doing it all.’

Knowing that the situation would be even more stressful when their daughter came along three years later, Mr Dyer negotiated four months additional paternity leave and then returned to work four and a half days a week.

Adrian Dyer, pictured with his wife Katariina and their two children, struggled with balancing work and family

Adrian Dyer, pictured with his wife Katariina and their two children, struggled with balancing work and family

Every Wednesday he leaves work at lunchtime, commutes back to the family home in Surrey, and spends time with his children – now six and three.

His wife, 41, who also works in the City, initially went back full time but has cut her hours down to three days a week to spend more time with the children.

Mr Dyer, also 41, runs the website Citydaduk.com to promote a better family/life balance for high-flying fathers.

He said: ‘We have got a really good balance now. I rush home on Wednesday lunchtime, pick up the children from school and we do something fun. I do the evening routine with them which I never get to do otherwise.

‘We have got a much better balance than we ever had before. When my paternity leave was over I didn’t want to go back to the way it was, it was impossible to work full time and spend time with my children during the week.’

Mothers were also nearly twice as likely as fathers to start doing domestic chores as soon as they got in from work.

Sarah Jackson, chief executive of Working Families, said: ‘The sands are shifting – younger parents are more likely to share care than the generations before them. 

'But they’re on shaky ground because working life hasn’t caught up.

‘If we want children to have the time with parents that they need, and for parents to give their best at work, employers need to tackle unrealistic and unmanageable workloads.’

Denise Priest, of Bright Horizons, said: ‘(Millennials are) the new generation of parents who are rebooting traditional working and caring patterns, but also challenging embedded notions of engagement and loyalty in the workplace.

'However, these increased expectations continue to bump up against working commitments, leading to stress and in some cases burnout.’

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