Politics

Donald Trump: ‘I Have The Greatest Toenails In The History of Mankind”

Mar 12, 2016

trump_muslim_sacrificeDonald Trump claimed today that he his toenails were the best ever in the history of the human race.

At a rally in Kansas City tonight the billionaire presidential candidate took 5 minutes from his standard stump speech for an extended dialogue on the topic

“They’re just the right size. Just the right color. Not too much pink. Not to much white. Just the right balance,” he told the audience.

“And the thickness. My god it’s perfect. I never have to press too hard when I clip. Always a perfect clip.”

“Folks are these the best toenails ever made in the history of mankind or what? Only someone with this kind of perfection can make America great again ”

Donald Trump is real estate developer, former reality star and noted narcissistic bigot. He is currently leading the polls for the Republican nomination.