EPHRAIM HARDCASTLE: Grouchy Hugh Grant delivers 'soft moan of despair' for his country

By Ephraim Hardcastle for the Daily Mail

Published: 20:05 EST, 4 October 2016 | Updated: 20:05 EST, 4 October 2016

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Grouchy film star Hugh Grant, 56, delivers a ‘soft moan of despair for my country,’ after reports of Theresa May’s meeting with media tycoon Rupert Murdoch.

Self-effacing TV personality Piers Morgan, 51, tweets back to pompous Hugh: ‘Our country’s fine, [you] just need to stop acting so the world doesn’t think we’re a bunch of annoying foppish twerps.

Grouchy film star Hugh Grant, 56, delivers a ‘soft moan of despair for my country,’ after reports of Theresa May’s meeting with media tycoon Rupert Murdoch

Today programme presenter Nick Robinson asks Theresa May: ‘You first dreamt of getting this job four decades ago. How does it compare to what you dreamt of?’

May, 60, incredulously replies: ‘I’m not sure if I did dream of the job four decades ago!’

Retorts Robinson: ‘I spoke to your cousin the other day for a documentary and he remembered listening to a tape of you as a teenager saying that you wanted to be prime minister.’

Snapped May: ‘I don’t remember saying it at that age.’ Publicity-cautious Theresa can be hard work on the airwaves!

Theresa May told Nick Robinson: '‘I’m not sure if I did dream of the job four decades ago!’

BBC official historian Lord Briggs’ memorial service was held yesterday, appropriately, at All Souls, Langham Place, next to the BBC.

One of the tribute speakers was Professor Jean Seaton who last year brought out Pinkoes and Traitors, the follow-up to Asa’s earlier history covering 1974-1987.

It was much criticised for about 40 errors. Was Asa spinning in his grave?

Irish actress Lisa Dwan, 38, pictured, was in full Beckettian spout when The Satanic Verses author Salman Rushdie, 69, dozed off on Monday night

What would the late, bleak playwright Sam Beckett make of Salman Rushdie’s unscripted contribution to the Old Vic premiere of his No’s Knife?

Irish actress Lisa Dwan, 38, pictured, was in full Beckettian spout when The Satanic Verses author Salman Rushdie, 69, dozed off on Monday night.

One distracted theatregoer remarked: ‘Dwan takes a lot of pauses in the play so Sir Salman’s snoring was even more unfortunate.’

Aged crooner Engelbert Humperdinck, 80, cheerily points out: ‘Tom Jones and I shared the same manager. I think he’s a great talent.’

Sir Tom, 76, who like Humperdinck was managed by the late Gordon Mills, is less flattering about ‘The Hump’.

Discussing Engelbert only last year, the Welshman unpleasantly remarked: ‘Once a c***, always a c***.’ Thank goodness Humperdinck – real name Arnold Dorsey – is the forgiving type!

Conservative peer Richard Balfe, 72, leads a revolt of members at the historic Reform Club in Pall Mall, opposed to the appointment of retired naval officer Rod Craig, 66, as its new secretary.

Balfe doesn’t take kindly to unwelcome scrutiny of his own activities in the famous establishment as fellow club member Arnold Rosen discovered when he enquired if Balfe declared club hospitality in the Lords’ register of members’ interests in 2014.

Balfe wrote back: ‘You seem to be suffering from delusional paranoia,’ adding: ‘I suggest you seek urgent medical help.’

Fruity television presenter Kirstie Allsopp, 45, tweets: ‘I’m overweight because I’m greedy, it’s not anyone else’s fault and I’m not suffering from a mental illness. I need to eat smaller portions.’

Loyal fans of lovely Kirstie will be quick to point out the camera always adds a few extra pounds.