Student nurse 'on the brink of giving up' reveals what her job is really like

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Nurses often complain of being underpaid and overworked
One anonymous single mother has taken to Facebook to share her story
Her 'absolutely horrifying' experience has been liked over 10,000 times

Published: 03:38 EST, 4 October 2016 | Updated: 08:15 EST, 4 October 2016

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A desperate confession from a student nurse 'on the brink of giving up' gives a no-holds-barred insight into the state of the profession.

The anonymous submission from a nurse who lives in Ireland begins: 'Today, yet again like so many other times, I have broken down crying wondering why the hell I bothered pursuing a degree in nursing.'

The comment, published on the 'Support for Nurses, Midwives and Frontline Staff in Ireland' Facebook page has struck a chord, getting more than 10,000 likes.

The anonymous student nurse took to the Facebook page 'Support for Nurses, Midwives and Frontline Staff in Ireland' to share her story

The woman, who is a fourth year mental health student nurse, describes her job as 'absolutely horrifying'.

She opens the post, with the words: 'Today, yet again like so many other times, I have broken down crying wondering why the hell I bothered pursuing a degree in nursing.'

Despite waking up 'ill, with a sore throat, blocked sinuses, a headache and to top it off I have vertigo', she had to go into work because the hospital is already short of staff and overworked.

She says, quite simply, 'They need me.'

The post, put up last week, has received nearly 1,000 comments.

The frank admission, made by the single mother, highlights what nurses have to go through on a daily basis and the low salaries than can leave people in the profession struggling to pay their bills.

When she arrived at work, the only other nurse on the ward called in sick.

Having only been placed in the hospital three days before, she was told she would have full responsibility of more than 20 patients suffering from mental health issues.

The single mother admits to going without breakfast and being too busy to have a proper lunch or even go to the toilet when she wants.

The anonymous nurse's account of her daily life has gained plenty of attention on Facebook

Only able to stuff a few crackers in her mouth between phone calls, it is all she can afford. The nurse says she felt faint at one stage but had to continue her job.

She writes: 'Words cannot express how miserable I was today and have been on so many occasions in the past.

'If anyone asked me advice on pursuing a career in nursing I would strongly advise against it. It is by far the worst decision I ever made.'

Finding it difficult to strike in numbers, she says nurses are aware patients will die if they do because they are short of staff.

She angrily asks: 'Who the hell else is going to look after the dying patients if we strike????'

The anonymous nurse didn't even get paid for the shift and received 'zilch' for her long hours because she is still a student.

Even when she qualifies, she says, she will get paid 'buttons for the work I do, just like all the other nurses when they qualify.'

She says she is barely able to feed her daughter and unable to pay her car tax/insurance and electricity, and as a result lives in a constant state of uncertainty, tiredness and panic.

Crying herself home from work, she is depressed and seeks comfort from her daughter - who she admits should be seeking comfort from her.

Her daughter makes her a cup of tea and a message: 'It will be okay, I love you.'

She feels the only option is to leave the country and work elsewhere, leaving behind her family, friends, home, culture and take her daughter away from school, her friends, her life and the things she loves.

The nurse ends her post by asking: 'How are we as nurses expected to look after others if we cannot look after ourselves?

'Why does the government not care about us?

'Why are we so undervalued?'

She signs off: 'From a really wore out student nurse on the brink of giving up.'

THE DAMNING POST IN FULL:

Today, yet again like so many other times, I have broken down crying wondering why the hell I bothered pursuing a degree in nursing. I am a fourth year Mental Health nurse student on my last supernumerary placement.

This morning I woke up ill, with a sore throat, blocked sinuses, a headache and to top it off I have vertigo. I contemplated phoning in sick but thought the day hospital are already short of staff and over worked. They need me.

Off I drove, rushing to try get my daughter to school (I am a lone parent) in a car I can’t afford, wondering how I am going to pay for petrol as I am already nearly out, AGAIN. Also worrying about how I am going to pay for food for the rest of the week as I only have €25 and need to buy petrol.

When I got into work I received a phone call from the only other nurse due in that day to tell me she was sick with a fever. I had only been placed in the day hospital 3 days previous and was told that day I would be left with full responsibility of approximately 20+ patients suffering from various mental health issues.

Some are acutely ill. I had very minimal knowledge and how to manage the place, in fact nearly no knowledge and I feel that amount of responsibility should not be left with a student who has never been in a day hospital.

I was to call all the clients to let them know their groups had been cancelled due to staff shortage. I find this to be so unfair to the clients as the care given to them in the day hospital is extremely important in aiding their recovery. The great work the nurses do here is so important to these people.

I never got to breakfast, have a proper lunch or wee as much as I needed to. I managed to stuff a few crackers (they’re all I can ever afford) in my mouth between phone calls which consisted mainly of trying to support people who wanted to self-harm, people who were in distress, people who needed adequate support and care from more than one student nurse who couldn’t cope with running a day hospital on her own sick, tired, hungry and needing the loo. I felt faint at one stage.

Words cannot express how miserable I was today and have been on so many occasions in the past. If anyone asked me advice on pursuing a career in nursing I would strongly advise against it. It is by far the worst decision I ever made. The HSE is shockingly understaffed and over worked.

It really hurts to know that bus drivers spend 4-6 weeks training and get paid more than a nurse after doing a gruelling 4 year degree. We are so unbelievably undervalued and we find it difficult to strike in numbers because people may actually die if we do strike as we are so short of staff. Who the hell else is going to look after the dying patients if we strike????

I did not get paid a penny for the work I did today as I am not even in my internship. Zilch. Even when I finally qualify I get paid buttons for the work I do, just like all the other nurses when they qualify.

I can barely feed my daughter and I cannot pay my car tax/insurance, my electricity, I often stay freezing cold in the winter because I can’t afford to put the heating on. I don’t buy myself any clothes, my socks are full of holes (no joke), I have a non-existent social life because I simply can’t afford to go anywhere (no exaggeration).

I am due to pay €270 for my daughter’s school books and I don’t bloody have it! I don’t get proper sleep every night because I am so anxious about money and work and so pissed off about my not so promising career choice.

I am depressed, run down and so bloody angry right now. I cried the whole way home in the car today that I could barely see the road. My daughter shouldn’t have had to comfort me when I walked in the door from work crying my eyes out, it should be me comforting her in times of need. She made me tea and wrote on the cup with chalk “It will be okay, I love you”. I am crying now even writing this. So many times she has had to see me in this state. I have just had enough.

And what’s worse?

When I qualify I will still be struggling and getting paid f*** all! It’s not fair that the only option that will see me and my daughter have the quality of life we are entitled to and deserve, is to leave my own bloody country. It makes no sense whatsoever. It makes my blood boil.

If I stay here my own mental health will be effected and I won’t be available to look after anyone else’s mental health. If I go I must leave my family, my friends and my home, my culture and take my daughter away from her school, her friends, her life and the things she loves. I am at the end of my tether. I am broken, defeated, deflated and soul destroyed. I am a former shadow of my happy, bright eyed, social self. I am lost.

How are we as nurses expected to look after others if we cannot look after ourselves? Why does the government not care about us? Why are we so undervalued?

From a really wore out student nurse on the brink of giving up.