'I just didn't want to fight any more': White Dee tells of battle with depression that led her to take 'every pill in the house' as work dried up after Benefits Street 

  • Dee - real name Deirdre Kelly - says she has been struggling for cash
  • Financial worries drove the 44-year-old reality star to attempt suicide
  • Says she became famous 'for having no talent' and missed Benefits Street
  • Pressure of having to defend herself 'took its toll' and caused depression

Reality star White Dee has revealed she was driven to depression because she was unprepared for the fame that came with appearing on the controversial show, Benefits Street.

Dee - real name Deirdre Kelly - told the Loose Women panel today the after effects of appearing on the Channel 4 show drove her to attempt suicide.

The 44-year-old appeared on the ITV talk show in a bid to help raise awareness for World Mental Health Day, urging those in distress to seek advice.

She told the presenters: 'I just didn't want to fight people anymore. I wasn't a singer or an actor and I became famous for not having any talent.' 

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The reality TV star sobbed as she told the panel how she had came to be depressed 

The reality TV star sobbed as she told the panel how she had came to be depressed 

Dee - real name Deirdre Kelly - told the panel the after effects of appearing on the Channel 4 show drove her to attempt suicide

Dee - real name Deirdre Kelly - told the panel the after effects of appearing on the Channel 4 show drove her to attempt suicide

She told the panel work dried up after her time on Benefits Street, adding she was unprepared for the fame which came with it - and having to continually defend herself.

Dee sobbed as she told Loose Women today: 'I snapped and had enough of everything, I wasn't ready for everything that happened with Benefits Street in the last two years. 

'I went with the flow but had to go on the defence from day one and it took its toll.'

She said she 'took every pill in the house' over the Easter period, after parting ways with her management company. 

The reality star also said she had 'fought hard' to get herself off of benefits - but was then left not knowing what to do. 

The 44-year-old appeared on Loose Women in a bid to help raise awareness for Mental Mental Health Day, urging those in distress to seek advice

The 44-year-old appeared on Loose Women in a bid to help raise awareness for Mental Mental Health Day, urging those in distress to seek advice

Dee said she had 'fought hard' to get herself off of benefits - but was then left not knowing what to do. She also told the presenters how she was forced to defend herself

Dee said she had 'fought hard' to get herself off of benefits - but was then left not knowing what to do. She also told the presenters how she was forced to defend herself

Dee was comforted and applauded by the presenters, including Lisa Riley, for sharing her story 

Dee was comforted and applauded by the presenters, including Lisa Riley, for sharing her story 

'I thought it was the end of TV and didn't know how long what I had earned would last me,' she said. 'I didn't want to go back into the system. People are like, "who does she think she is".  

She also said she missed James Turner Street - where the controversial show was filmed: 'I was 100 per cent happy before the programme came along despite my depression - I miss being on James Turner Street, I never wanted to take my life then.

'I've had counselling sessions but I'm a proud person and want to do it on my own. I'm the person people come to. I'm the hard one. I'm not the one who goes for people for help. I'd probably lie.

'I was in my 40s when I lost my mum, I snapped, imagine them coming home aged nine and 18 after telling them "you're killing me" - and I could have been dead. 

'I started looking at old pictures of my mum and I thought I'd save everyone the hassle, the kids don't deserve a mum who's always feeling sorry for herself...I started taking pills and alcohol.

'My friend Sally found me - the alcohol made me gag as I'm not a drinker so I spaced it out. It was Easter Sunday, Sally knew something was up and she just appeared.

'It's coming up to six months ago since I made the most stupid mistake of my life, I'm surrounded by positive people and I'm getting to a much better mindset.

'You have to speak to someone no matter who you are.'  

White Dee (pictured in 2014) says she has been struggling financially since her media work 'dried up' and even tried to take her own life by swallowing pills and downing alcohol

White Dee (pictured in 2014) says she has been struggling financially since her media work 'dried up' and even tried to take her own life by swallowing pills and downing alcohol

Dee shot to fame on Channel 4's Benefits Street in 2014 (pictured), which was followed by a string of media appearances including a stint on Celebrity Big Brother

Dee shot to fame on Channel 4's Benefits Street in 2014 (pictured), which was followed by a string of media appearances including a stint on Celebrity Big Brother

'After Benefits Street everyone thought I was a millionaire,' she told the Sun earlier this week. 'But the reality was very different.'

The 44-year-old told how the work started 'drying up' but, reluctant to go back on benefits, she was forced to ask friends if they had any work going.

She added that despite being 'constantly' worried about work she was reluctant to go back to the job centre and sign on.

'So I took out every pill I had in the house and got a bottle of vodka,' Dee recalled. 'I took one tablet and washed it down with a shot, then another one.'

Dee at her former home in James Turner Street,  Birmingham. Following her appearance on Benefits Street she said 'hundreds' of people turning up on her doorstep for autographs

Dee at her former home in James Turner Street, Birmingham. Following her appearance on Benefits Street she said 'hundreds' of people turning up on her doorstep for autographs

After drinking different spirits, the star said she woke up and was immediately sick.

Dee, who says she is now on the road to recovery, added: 'I’ll never let myself get low enough to do something so stupid again.' 

Earlier this year the mother-of-two, originally from Winston Green, Birmingham, revealed she was on the verge of losing her house and going back to 'square one'

In a statement released to a local paper the star, who shot to fame in 2014, said she had found herself back at square one - but vowed she would not be going back to her roots with the lifestyle which made her famous when she appeared on the Channel 4 documentary.

Dee appeared on Celebrity Big Brother in 2014, coming in at fifth place - but the star has since shrugged off suggestions that her media career has made her into a 'millionaire'

Dee appeared on Celebrity Big Brother in 2014, coming in at fifth place - but the star has since shrugged off suggestions that her media career has made her into a 'millionaire'

Dee speaks at a Policy Exchange fringe meeting at the Conservative party conference in Birmingham in September 2014; but the star says the work has since 'dried up'

Dee speaks at a Policy Exchange fringe meeting at the Conservative party conference in Birmingham in September 2014; but the star says the work has since 'dried up'

Dee first appeared in the spotlight after appearing on Benefits Street and then took part in Celebrity Big Brother in 2014, where she came fifth.

In 2014, it was reported Dee was making up to £6,000 a night in appearances.

She charged at least £1,500 an hour to appear at nightclubs and her manager claimed she could manage four meet-and-greets a night. 

Dee had previously moved from her home on James Turner Street, which was the setting for Benefits Street, after her seven-year-old son and 16-year-old daughter, who are both mixed race, received online abuse.

The reality star appeared on Celebrity Big Brother in 2014 following her rise to fame, coming in at fifth place. Despite struggling for cash, Dee says she is now on the road to recovery

The reality star appeared on Celebrity Big Brother in 2014 following her rise to fame, coming in at fifth place. Despite struggling for cash, Dee says she is now on the road to recovery

In January 2015, it was reported Dee had almost made £1million through her new career.

Dee tried to previously boost her television career by having Botox injections. 

In March, Dee had the injections during regular appointments with a cosmetics surgeon in Cannock, Staffordshire, to 'look good on television.' 

For confidential support call the Samaritans on 116123 or visit a local Samaritans branch, see samaritans.org for details 

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