My Proposal for TV Ratings on Anti-Unity Values (AUV)
In Gender Behavior
By “Shortcake”
http://www.soc.hawaii.edu/leonj/leonj/leonpsy20/g20lecturenotes409b.htm
PREFACE
In Report 2 of this class, we were to complete the task of self-witnessing our own relations. Basically this meant analyzing our own relationship in regards to the unity model. The way I completed the data collection on this area was to pay specific attention to the way that my spouse and I interacted and reacted to each other. Although I was to do this to collect data for the report, I still find myself paying closer attention to the ways that we “are” around each other.
· http://www.soc.hawaii.edu/leonj/409bs2004/shortcake/report2.htm
I found through the process of self-witnessing of the sensorimotor, cognitive and affective areas within myself, that my husband and I are on the right track if we want to reach unity according to Dr. James’s unity model.
The purpose of report 3 (this report) is to watch current programs on television and rate the Anti-Unity Values (AUV) they reflect. We first must watch a program to develop a “scale” of our choice, and then we must use this scale to rate another program. With the wide variety of programs available on television today, this ought to show an interesting contrast of individual differences within the students of Generation 20.
INTRODUCTION
The unity model is the foundation of this course, PSY409b. We have based all of our discussions on and around this topic so I fell that once again, I should mention a bit about it. Below is the actual chart of the unity model. It shows how one must reach the inmost self in involvement with their significant other in order to reach unity.
Chart of the Three Models in Gender Relations
|
LEVEL OF UNITY |
NAME OF MODEL |
THREEFOLD SELF INVOLVED |
|
3 |
UNITY |
AFFECTIVE |
|
2 |
EQUITY |
COGNITIVE |
|
1 |
DOMINANCE |
SENSORIMOTOR |
For further exploration of reports involving the
unity model, please go to my generation’s class folder where you will find many
more interesting reports on the self and unity.
I strongly suggest reading the past reports of:
‘duclos’ http://www.soc.hawaii.edu/leonj/409bs2004/duclos/
and ‘ruby_skies’ http://www.soc.hawaii.edu/leonj/409bs2004/ruby_skies/
Not only are their sites interestingly put together, I think
they do a great job of summarizing the unity model in a different way than I
have.
CLASS ORAL PRESENTATIONS AND LECTURE DISCUSSIONS
Every
week in class we had students give oral presentations on various aspects
surrounding the unity model. I chose the following 3 student presentations to
discuss at this time due to my own level of interest in the topic they were
assigned.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
The reference was from Tannen’s book Gender and Discourse
pp.137-148.
I
found this presentation to be very interesting. Tannen’s book was our only
required text for the class. It did not really deal with the unity model, but
it reflects on the differences in the way we talk between males and females.
Learning to pay better attention in this area and to analyze the way we act,
react, and interact amongst ourselves in everyday life as well as our own
relationships is in my opinion the foundation for creating unity.
Ruby
included some comics that she found in the daily paper that relayed how men
will react differently as to who they are speaking to, they would adjust their
tone if necessary. It is difficult to get across in words what the comics
portray, but I urge anyone to pick up a daily paper and look to see if they can
see the different ways that people “characters” talk to each other. I thought
that including the comic strips, as a part of the presentation, was fantastic.
While comics usually poke fun at everyday activities, there really is truth
within them.
I
thought the point that Ruby made mentioning the play that was being analyzed in
Tannen’s book shows the clarity points that Tannen and Lakoff want us to see.
They chose the play because it only involved two prople and was a stereotypical
dialog between a man and a woman.
As
far a finding points in Ruby’s presentation to disagree with…there weren’t any.
I feel that she did a terrific job at portraying what Tannen meant in her book.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
The reference was from Tannen’s book Gender and Discourse
pp.68-77.
Lau presented Chapter 2 of the required text for his oral
presentation. In his handout he made a chart which represented different areas
of the United States and showed the styles of talk within each area. I thought
that the way he presented this information was concise and clearly demonstrated
the differences that Tannen wants her readers to see.
I thought that it was funny that the style of the Midwest
only had one style and that was “aggressive interrupters.” Being from the Midwest myself, I am sure my
classmates would be able to verify this information. I have noticed more
through self-witnessing, the way in which I present myself to other people. I
found out that I really am an aggressive interrupter, it was the way I grew up,
everyone did it.
Now that I no longer live in the Midwest and I am gaining
more knowledge of the way people act and react to each other, I find this
valuable information so that I may be able to better my communicative skills
and learn to adapt to a more broad understanding of communication not only
between men and women, but also culturally.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
The
reference was reference 16 The Doctrine of the Wife by Leon James
http://www.soc.hawaii.edu/leonj/leonj/leonpsy/instructor/gloss/wife2.html
Even though I presented this
reference myself, I believe that it is very important to the topic of this
report. I have also included below a chart from the Doctrine of the Wife.
When I first presented this
report, it really did not make much sense to me. I thought that the whole this
was based purely on religious aspects, however, with further study and a much
better understanding of what the point of the Doctrine is, I now feel like I
could have maybe presented a better oral discussion.
In this particular part of the
Doctrine, Dr. James gives several charts to help one understand the anti-unity
values in relationships. Having since heard other oral discussions on other
parts of the Doctrine (there are 4 parts) it is easier for me to understand
what the charts mean. Now that this report has come around and we are focusing
on the topic of what not to do in a relationship (AUV) the charts make even
more sense.
While I cannot really say as to if
I agree or disagree with what the Doctrine says, I keep an open mind. I have
included one of the main charts in Ref. 16 below. The column on the far right
is listed as symptoms of temptations; this could also be another name for
anti-unity values.
|
The Temptations
Husbands Must Overcome (Matrix 2) |
||
|
ORDERLY SEQUENCE |
MAIN
CONFLICT |
SYMPTOMS
OF THE TEMPTATIONS THAT |
|
I INFANCY WHITE CELESTIAL SENSUOUS |
ROMANCE vs. REJECTION |
**
being unfaithful to his wife |
|
II CHILDHOOD YELLOW SPIRITUAL SENSUOUS |
DOMINANCE vs. HURTFULNESS |
**
complaining about his wife |
|
III ADOLESCENCE GREEN NATURAL SENSUOUS |
EQUITY vs. ABUSIVENESS |
**
denigrating his wife |
|
INVERSION |
||
|
IV YOUNG ADULTHOOD BLUE NATURAL RATIONAL |
SURRENDER vs. PREROGATIVES |
** treating his wife severely |
|
V ADULTHOOD BROWN SPIRITUAL RATIONAL |
SPECIALIZATION vs. INSECURITIES |
**
feeling disapproval for his wife |
|
VI OLD AGE BLACK CELESTIAL RATIONAL |
UNITY vs. DISCONNECTION |
** expresses impatience to his wife |
The color code helps you keep track of the characteristics of
each period or segment and what it takes to overcome the temptations given in
that period. Remember this general rule that holds for all charts:
MY PROPOSAL FOR AUV RATINGS ON TV
My
understanding of anti-unity values is simply the values that go against
creating unity within a relationship. Dr. James covers this area with specific
examples in his lecture notes under the section of Report 3 as well as in his
Doctrine of The Wife. I have included below part of the example he used
specifically for Report 3 (http://www.soc.hawaii.edu/leonj/leonj/leonpsy20/g20lecturenotes409b.htm
) .
Examples of anti-unity values that are promoted include (i) all the ones mentioned in your textbook, (ii) in the Readings, (iii) in the class, (iv) in your observations of the shows you are analyzing, and (v) in the following sample list I made up when I watched some episodes of the Soap called One Life to Live on the Soap Net during the month of December 2003.
1. Living together unmarried
2. Having children out of wedlock
3. Making each other jealous on purpose
4. Adultery for various reasons
5. Promiscuity and bi-sexuality
6. Sexy dressing for men other than one's partner
7. Having a same sex best friend who is placed ahead of the partner or in competition for certain things
8. Having a heterosexual best friend who is placed ahead of the partner or in competition for certain things
9. Same sex friends going out as a group for fun and entertainment without their partners
10. Flirting with other gender as retaliation against one's partner (or other reason)
11. Separate interests and activities accepted for partners
12. Manipulating partner through deception
13. Accepting the idea that it's OK to "agree to disagree" about some things
14. Promoting the idea that one should not try to change one's partner but should accept them with their faults, etc.
15. Girls only or boys only entertainment
16. Acceptance of the idea that men are more important
17. Promoting the idea that men are more rational than women
18. Promoting the idea that women are generally frivolous as part of their gender
19. Making it look normal for a man to exploit women
20. Making it look normal for a man to abuse women
21. Making it look normal for a man to have prerogatives or perks that women should accept and honor (e.g., serving men, doing what they want no matter what, being dominant, etc.)
22. Making it look like what women say and think as less important
23. Accepting the idea that a man does not need to "grovel" when he apologizes for something bad he did to her (the minimum is enough and she should not ask for more even if her feelings are still hurt or else she is being "unreasonable" etc.)
First of all, I had to decide on
what shows to watch. With the wide range of shows on television today there
were many, many choices. Knowing that I could have watched any soap opera on
television I would find numerous anti-unity values, I chose to take the harder
route. I really do not watch a lot of television aside from home improvement
and history/discovery channels, but I was aware of more programs that tried to
show more of what daily life is for more people.
On and off since the series began,
I have watched Dharma and Greg. I have found it very funny to watch, when I do
watch it. Over the years, the relationship between Dharma and Greg has been
continually developing since the show began. They got married on a whim, right
after meeting, and have been learning and growing with each other ever since.
Dharma was raised with hippie
parents and was taught to respect the earth and people. Greg was raised in a
bureaucratic world with everything superficial around him. Not only has the
experience of the two of them being married had an effect on their own lives,
but the lives of their parents as well.
I do not recall how many years it
has been on television now, but I just saw an episode two weeks ago and I
noticed that the character of Greg has really come a long way in the sense of
the husband. He is really starting to try to please his wife and put her first.
I couldn’t help but relate him to a man trying to follow the unity model.
In the specific episode, Dharma
was upset over something and when he would start to say something, she would
start to have a certain reaction, then he would change what he was going to say
to agree with her thought and then she would be fine. Had he not changed what
he was going to say, it would have started many disagreements.
I find it really neat to see that
there are actually programs on television that are trying to support the woman
and the wiser of the two in a marriage. While sometimes Dharma ends up being
incorrect in the end, although not often, I think this show in general promotes
qualities of unity in relationships.
After I watched the episode of Dharma and Greg, I thought of all the many anti-unity values listed previously in this report. I then had to figure out some sort of scale to be able to use on a different television program. Wanting to keep away from soap dramas, I thought about what show I wanted to use before creating the scale. I think that the list from Dr. James (above) works well with the soap dramas, but I thought that I needed a bit of a toned down version for the show I wanted to use.
Below are the areas in which I decided to rate the new show in my scale of AUVs.
0 = unity
1 = not completely a unity
action
2 = sees faults, still acts
anti-untiy
3 = starting to see faults of
behavior
4 = anti-unity
***Since these are AUV
actions, the higher the score the greater the Anti-Unity Level of the
relationship.
I chose the show Everybody Loves Raymond, which airs on Tuesday nights on CBS. I did not find an example of all the AUVs I had listed in my scale, however, I was able to find very good examples of some of them.
In the
beginning of the episode three women were talking, these women were sitting
around gabbing about their lives (just like Tannen says they do) and Debra
(Ray’s wife) tells of a dream that Raymond has about a train “choo, choo.” One
of the women, her sister in law, then tells her husband, Ray’s brother. Ray
then gets teased from his brother as well as his father about the “choo, choo”
|
|
0 |
1 |
2 |
3 |
4 |
|
1. unfriendly to the wife |
X |
|
|
|
|
|
2. complaining about the wife/husband |
|
|
|
|
X |
|
3. criticizing the wife |
X |
|
|
|
|
|
4. lying to or keeping info from the wife |
X |
|
|
|
|
|
5. deliberately misleading |
X |
|
|
|
|
|
6. making each other feel jealous |
X |
|
|
|
|
|
7. making her feel ashamed |
X |
|
|
|
|
The next
day, when Ray’s brother and father come over to watch a ball game on TV, he
leads them to believe that his dream was really about a girl from high
school ??? Choolinski, which he
couldn’t tell his wife. They guys really admire him because of this. This leads
the guys (husbands) to turn the game off and start a gossip session about their
wives. Which does eventually get back to the wives.
|
|
0 |
1 |
2 |
3 |
4 |
|
1. unfriendly to the wife |
|
|
|
|
X |
|
2. complaining about the wife |
|
|
|
|
X |
|
3. criticizing the wife |
|
|
|
|
X |
|
4. lying to or keeping info from the wife |
|
|
|
|
X |
|
5. deliberately misleading |
|
|
|
|
X |
|
6. making each other feel jealous |
|
|
|
|
X |
|
7. making her feel ashamed |
X |
|
|
|
|
After the
guy session of gossip, the show has Ray and Debra in their bed at the end of
the night when Ray uses the gossip session he had to share some gossip with
Debra about his mother’s secret spaghetti sauce, which somehow leads to her
getting excited and him getting to take advantage of it.
|
|
0 |
1 |
2 |
3 |
4 |
|
1. unfriendly to the wife |
X |
|
|
|
|
|
2. complaining about the wife |
|
|
X |
|
|
|
3. criticizing the wife |
|
|
X |
|
|
|
4. lying to or keeping info from the wife |
|
|
|
|
X |
|
5. deliberately misleading |
|
|
|
|
X |
|
6. making each other feel jealous |
|
|
X |
|
|
|
7. making her feel ashamed |
|
X |
|
|
|
Then the next day, Ray’s wife finds out what he said to the guys about the dream and she confronts him in front of the whole family. She wants to know why he lied to her. He says that the dream really was about a train and not about the girl and that he told the guys that because he didn’t want to loose face with the guys.
|
|
0 |
1 |
2 |
3 |
4 |
|
1. unfriendly to the wife |
|
|
|
X |
|
|
2. complaining about the wife |
X |
|
|
|
|
|
3. criticizing the wife |
X |
|
|
|
|
|
4. lying to or keeping info from the wife |
|
|
|
|
X |
|
5. deliberately misleading |
X |
|
|
|
|
|
6. making each other feel jealous |
|
|
|
X |
|
|
7. making her feel ashamed |
|
|
|
|
X |
CONCLUSION
I would have to say that this
report help to me to reflect on all that I have learned throughout the entire
semester. There were times when I didn’t think I would make it through this
class but I kept an open mind and stuck with it. I would have to say that it
was very interesting trying to relate what I have learned in class to what I
see all around me. I think that it is easy to take the information and analyze
a relationship, but trying to do it to shows on television was a harder concept
for me. Maybe this is because I really do not get too involved in television
programs. When I do watch them I only look at them as entertainment and not of
reflecting the real world around me.
Having to do this report will
probably have an impact on the way I see people and their relationships for the
rest of my life. I would not say that I buy everything presented in this class
hook line and sinker, but there are definitely some points that make a lot of
logical sense that simply cannot be ignored.
FUTURE GENERATIONS
My
advise to future generations completing this report or any other reports for
any of Dr. James’s classes is to start early! Even if you don’t actually start
the typing part early, at least start the thinking processes early. Completely
read and reread and reread again what is expected in the report and then start
thinking as to how you are going to go about your report. It will make it much
easier to write when it comes down to it.
I would also suggest that if you
are new to uploading that you create a very simple outline of the report, learn
how to save it to a web page, and upload it. This will not only get you started
on typing the report, but it will help you figure out the whole uploading
thing. I don’t know if free trials will be available for you in the future, but
a tip to get around them when they expire is to delete the program from your
computer and then do another free trial, that way the trial does not recognize
you as a previous user. If you have a modern computer it only takes a few
clicks and then you are there. Of course I may sound like some sort of pro at
this, but believe me this whole class was a learning experience for me. .
I would also have to say that maybe in order to understand a lot
of the concepts presented in this class, one must have the ability to think
abstractly. If this is difficult for you, you may want to consider another
class, however if you are up for a challenge, you may find this journey very
interesting.