EPHRAIM HARDCASTLE: Prince Harry won't talk about Meghan Markle on upcoming Caribbean tour 

Prince Harry won’t talk to the media during his coming tour of the Caribbean. So he’ll duck questions about his relationship with US TV star Meghan Markle. But if he plans on marrying, his grandmother will have to be informed. Ms Markle’s divorcee status isn’t insurmountable. Princess Anne re-married in 1992 in Scotland. Charles and Camilla, both divorcees, married in a register office in 2005. And a Princess Meghan would mean the bells of St George’s Chapel pealing out once again every August 4 in tribute to her birthday, a milestone shared with the late Queen Mother.

Prince Harry won’t talk to the media during his coming tour of the Caribbean. So he’ll duck questions about his relationship with US TV star Meghan Markle

 

Bono's elevation to Woman Of The Year by Glamour magazine – for supporting female issues – doesn’t impress the Irish Times

Our former ambassador to Washington, Sir Christopher Meyer, says on TV the Foreign Office should be ‘hoping’ for a Hillary Clinton win and that Britain should be ‘fearful’ of a Donald Trump victory in today’s US presidential election. Isn’t this rather undiplomatic of Sir Christopher? Mrs Clinton was secretary of state under Barack Obama, who warned the US would send post-Brexit Britain to ‘the back of the queue’ for trade deals. Whereas Trump said: ‘They’ll always be at the front of the line. They’ve always been great allies.’

Bono's elevation to Woman Of The Year by Glamour magazine – for supporting female issues – doesn’t impress the Irish Times, which describes him as a ‘spec-wearing, doggerel-spouting rock dinosaur [who] aggravates the masses’, adding: ‘Don’t rule out a win at Crufts.’

 

Screen beauty Tippi Hedren, 86, reveals how late filmmaker Alfred Hitchcock sexually preyed on her in a new memoir but she regrets never bedding Sir Sean Connery. Birds star Tippi appeared in Hitchcock’s 1964 film Marnie opposite Connery and says she was often asked if she had an affair with him, reflecting: ‘I learned very, very quickly that when you have an affair with anybody it shows in your eyes and I didn’t want anything like that to ruin my performance by having an affair with Sean.’ She then frankly adds: ‘Although I must say I regret it now.’

Screen beauty Tippi Hedren, 86, reveals how she regrets never bedding Sir Sean Connery

 

Website Popbitch gleaned this gem from playwright Alan Bennett’s new diaries. ‘R (his companion Rupert) having spent most of the evening (and yesterday’s) watching Wuthering Heights, turns to me at the finish and says: “You’re rather like Heathcliff.” Me (gratified): “Really?” R: “Yeah. Difficult, Northern and a c***.”’

 

Jeremy Clarkson, 56, apologised to the Mexican ambassador in London after describing his countrymen on Top Gear as ‘lazy, feckless, flatulent [and] overweight’. He recalls in Radio Times: ‘I didn’t have to, the Beeb didn’t tell me to, but it was out of order. So we went down and said we were really sorry and got absolutely paralytic on tequila with him. That was a good day.’ He’s a great loss to diplomacy, isn’t he?

 

Prince Andrew, who has been Andy Pandy (childhood), Randy Andy (Koo Stark era) and Air Miles Andy, is now, because of portliness and bossiness, Kim Jong Andy (after North Korea’s ridiculous dictator).

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