'I hated myself for a long time': Married at First Sight star Jamie Otis details her heartbreaking experience of having two abortions, explaining she made a 'necessary' choice to escape poverty
- Jamie, 32, joined a number of celebrities in sharing her abortion story after Alabama passed a bill last week imposing a near-total ban on the procedure
- The nurse spoke out about her abortions for the first time since opening up about them in her book, Wifey 101, for which she received brutal backlash
- Since publishing the book in 2016, Jamie has kept the details about her abortions a closely-guarded 'secret,' before finally sharing her experience on Instagram
- Jamie wrote an essay about her decision, explaining that she grew up in extreme poverty with a drug-addicted mother who couldn't take care of her five children
- When she was 18, Jamie got pregnant by the first guy she had ever had sex with and opted to have an abortion to end her family's cycle of poverty
- She made the same decision after she got pregnant in nursing school
- 'For the woman right now who is struggling and feels that she has no one on her side, know that you’re not alone and you’re not evil,' she wrote
- Jamie has a one-year-old daughter Henley with her husband Doug Hehner
Married at First Sight star Jamie Otis has opened up about having two abortions, stressing that while no one wants to have one, it is a 'necessary option' for women.
The 32-year-old nurse joined a number of celebrities in sharing her abortion story after Alabama passed a bill last week imposing a near-total ban on the procedure, including those for victims of rape or incest.
'I just cannot continue to sit in silence while women's fundamental human rights are being taken away. I am speaking up for HER,' the reality star wrote on Instagram.
Opening up: Jamie Otis, 32, has joined a number of celebrities in sharing her abortion story after Alabama passed a bill last week imposing a near-total ban on the procedure
Decision; When she was 18, Jamie got pregnant by the first guy she had ever had sex with and opted to have an abortion. She had her second abortion when she was in nursing school
'I had an abortion. Twice. Is it something I'm proud of? Heck no! No one *wants* an abortion,' continued. 'It has left the most painful hole in my heart. But do I think women should be stripped of their right to choose? Absolutely not.'
Jamie, who has a one-year-old daughter named Henley with her husband Doug Hehner, said she kept quiet about her abortions after receiving backlash when she first wrote about her experience in her book, Wifey 101.
In an essay for People, she explained that she grew up in extreme poverty with a drug-addicted mother who couldn't provide for her five children.
Jamie said her mom 'dropped out of high school' and had a string of abusive boyfriends. She had no idea who her father was and her mother couldn't afford to take care of her and her siblings. She would wake up without electricity or food half of the time.
'We lived in a trailer that had leaky ceilings with doors that wouldn’t shut all the way and windows that were duct-taped,' she recalled. 'But the hardest part was that my mom was gone. She left us for weeks at a time and we were just teenagers and kids fending for ourselves.'
Childhood: Jamie (pictured with her sisters Johanna Harvey and Amylynn Lucas) said she grew up in extreme poverty with a drug-addicted mother who couldn't take care of her five children
Hard times: The reality star (pictured with her sister Amylynn) said they would often wake up without heat, electricity, and food
Caregiver: Jamie took care of her siblings her when her mother left them for weeks at a time. Her sisters Amylynn and Leah King are pictured after she bought them store-bought treats
When she was 18, Jamie got pregnant by the first guy she had ever had sex with. She actually found out she was pregnant when she went to a clinic to get birth control.
The nurse told her abortion was an option, but she initially brushed it off because in her family 'you don't have abortions under any circumstances.'
However, she knew that her boyfriend wouldn't be a good father, and she didn't want to drop out of school and have a baby with an abusive man like her mother and older sister did. She didn't want to be stuck in the same cycle of poverty.
'I chose to have an abortion. I wouldn’t have been able to provide this child the kind of life he or she deserved,' she wrote. 'And I wanted to finish college and provide for my siblings and give us a better life. I didn’t see how that would be possible while also taking care of a baby.'
Jamie said she had a second abortion when she got pregnant in nursing school.
Throwback: Jamie worked as a waitress to get herself through school. She was dressed for her waitressing job when she posed with Amylynn after helping her get ready for her first prom
Reality: Jamie's mother had so many boyfriends that she didn't know who her real father was until she used a DNA test to find her paternal family this year
Family: Jamie and her husband Doug Hehner have a one-year-old daughter named Henley
'I don’t even want to admit that it happened twice, but here I am sharing my story so other women can feel that they aren’t alone,' she explained.
'My abortions were a secret I kept to myself for nearly my whole life. I hated myself for a very long time for it, and I know the stones people will throw at me: Why didn’t I use birth control better? Why wasn’t I more careful? But the thing is, it happened to me and continues to happen to couples.
'You can throw stones at me if you want, but I just think of a young woman who has no one to turn to. I wish someone had said to me back then that I’m not evil. I felt like a terrible, selfish human being and sometimes I still do.'
The mother-of-one said she often reminds herself that she wouldn't have her daughter Henley if she had 'two children with two men who were not fit to be fathers.'
Choice: The reality star said she didn't want to drop out of school and have a baby with an abusive man like her mother and older sister did
Understanding: She recalled having sweaty palms when she told Dough that she had two abortions, but he was nothing but supportive
Jamie met her husband Doug for the first time when they said 'I do' as strangers on the first season of the reality series Married at First Sight.
She recalled having sweaty palms when she told him that she had two abortions, but he was nothing but supportive, telling her: 'I’m so sorry you had to make this decision so young. That was so brave of you.'
She said she knows she is going to get backlash for sharing her story, and while her abortions 'still torment' her, she is 'thankful' that she was able to have them.
'There’s not enough constructive discussion about abortion. It sucks. It really sucks. But the truth of the matter is it is a necessary option,' she said.
Jamie credited Busy Philipps for giving her the strength to share her experience because the actress was 'brave and bold enough to speak out.'
Honest: Jamie said she knows she is going to get backlash for sharing her story, and while her abortions 'still torment' her, she is 'thankful' that she was able to have them
Reminder: The mother-of-one said she often reminds herself that she wouldn't have her daughter Henley if she had 'two children with two men who were not fit to be fathers'
'For the woman right now who is struggling and feels that she has no one on her side, know that you’re not alone and you’re not evil. We women need to band together—men too—and support each other,' Jamie wrote at the end of her essay.
Busy, who wrote about having an abortion at age 15 in her memoir 'This Will Only Hurt a Little,' defended the rights of 'women and their doctors' during an episode of her late night talk show earlier this month.
The 39-year-old decried the new controversial law in Georgia that prohibits doctors from performing abortions after they can detect 'fetal cardiac activity,' which occurs at about six weeks into a pregnancy.
Over the last few months, Ohio, Kentucky, Mississippi, Utah, and Arkansas have all passed similar 'heartbeat bills.'
'The statistic is that one in four women will have an abortion before age 45,' Busy said. 'That statistic sometimes surprises people, and maybe you're sitting there thinking, "I don't know a woman who would have an abortion." Well, you know me.'
Inpiraiton: Jamie credited Busy Philipps for giving her the strength to share her experience because the actress was 'brave and bold enough to speak out' on her show earlier this month
Trauma: Busy first wrote about having an abortion at age 15 in her memoir 'This Will Only Hurt a Little'
Stronger together: Minka Kelly (left) and Jameela Jamil (right) are among the celebrities who have shared their abortion stories this month
Just days later, she tweeted: '1 in 4 women have had an abortion. Many people think they don't know someone who has, but #youknowme. So let's do this: if you are also the 1 in 4, let's share it and start to end the shame. Use #youknowme and share your truth.'
Thousands of women have followed in Busy 's footsteps and shared stories about their abortions using the hashtag #YouKnowMe after news broke about the near-ban on the procedure in Alabama.
The controversial new bill makes all abortions illegal unless they are required to save the mother's life. It was passed 25-6 on May 14 and all of the votes in favor of it were from Republican men.
The law—HB 314—is set to come into effect in six months, and doctors who defy the law could face 99 years in prison.
Milla Jovovich, Minka Kelly, Amber Tamblyn, Tess Holliday, Jameela Jamil have all shared their abortion stories this month in response to the new legislation in Georgia and Alabama.
