A Red Hot Revival Feb. 14, 2003 Will Rogers Theater Oklahoma City By Jack Ash Wherever Dita von Teese is standing right now there may be a 16-inch waist in a vintage corset. Imagine that. Stockings. Lingerie. She is the embodiment of burlesque reborn, or is it gothabilly incarnate? Bow down to one knee either way. A Red Hot Revival with Dita is coming to The Will Rogers Theater, 4322 N. Western Ave. in Oklahoma City Friday, Feb. 14, a night meant for lovers. Fall into these follies. "I've never been to Oklahoma City. I probably wouldn't have scheduled something on Valentine's Day if it wasn't going to be a really, really fun show!" Dita said from a telephone in Cleveland, Ohio. If I was a big Hollywood celebrity reporter, I could think of several of the most important questions to ask this burlesque preservationist, so knowledgeable of the history of film and screen and stage and the models she emulates. So I wished for a 10 minute telephone interview and I got it. I imagined her talking on an old rotary phone while on her back, receiver to her ear, red fingernails against black hairdo, and her legs in the air above her head. Legs daintily crossed, of course. With a clearing of a frog in the throat, I asked the first question. "What are you wearing right now?" I guess I had to know. Is she surrounded by pink feathers? Something satin? Silk? Is she standing in garters and stiletto heels with an ankle strap that shines when polished? These questions were answered when she spoke on a weekday afternoon in her hotel room. She was appearing at a Cleveland gentleman's club that night, one that is not owned by the mob but has great steaks, she said. "I'm wearing sheer black pajamas right now because I've been in bed all day," Dita said. "I'm getting ready to go to work." I couldn't wait for the chance to see her at the Will Rogers Theater where, as the song says, the show should make "Oklahoma City looks oh so pretty." Remove the blindfold Bible-Belters. Dita is touching the Heartland on St. Valentine's Day. If I could see her now what would I see? Her green eyes? Black, streaming hair? A vision that is all a blushing, flushed red blur in the end, I bet. Is she slowly, creeping and crawling up her web to prey on a struggling butterfly? Is she smiling like a cat licking her lips in the canary cage? Or blowing blue smoke. This is what I can see now. Dita is on top of the 1940s and 1950s pinup girl revisionists, and all such modern models for that matter. The crowned Queen of what could be called neo-burlesque, Dita is a darker Betty Grable, elegantly risque, but still a martini Dean Martin would drown in. Man's ruin. Man's reason. She dances in the footsteps of Sally Rand, Lilli St. Cyr and Tempest Storm. She loves the Technicolor musical movies of the 1940s. She knows the year is 2003. "I don't think I'm trying to do burlesque the way that it was done back then. I just want to kind of make it more glossy and more attractive to people now. Dancing around with a pair of ostrich feather fans for 20 minutes with a flash of leg doesn't keep people's attention the way it did back then when a little bit of leg was shocking," Dita said. Dita von Teese's career is leaving a lot of folks looking like their fingers are stuck in their sockets. She has risen from the Hollywood pinup model ranks with her lasergun stares that blasted a fast track through the stars. Hugh Hefner put her on the Dec. cover of Playboy. Her image could be found in Russian editions where she's no secret agent any more She's in demand from coast to coast, some real worldwide retro. Red hot and white hot. Dita was once a house dancer at an Orange County strip club called Captain Cream Cabaret and Gentlemen's Club in the early 1990s, surprising the normal strip bar crowds with her corsets and stockings while dancing to vintage music. "People thought it was kind of strange, " she said. She's been a ballet dancer since age five, and she's wanted to be a pinup favorite since she was a young girl. Easy enough to imagine that, cause she was born to turn heads and cause a few wrecks. Especially those who pass her while she's driving her 1937 Chrysler. See Dita and relive an era, or just watch what has never really stopped. My third question was this: "What size shoes do you wear?" "Size six," she said. "What pairs are with you in your hotel room now?" She revealed she was in the room with a pair of stiletto designer boots that lace up the front, and a 1950s pair of pumps. She'd packed lightly. I asked another important question. "Say I had to hide in your closet. What would be in there with me?" "In my closet?" She sounded dreamy now. "Uhmm. Oh. Well many, many fabulous pairs of shoes. But I have two closets." I could see over the heels now. I asked, "Like more than 100?" "Oh yes, definitely more. I have a whole room that is like all of my wardrobe. It's the size of anybody else's living room. It's just all my wardrobe," Dita said. "And then I have a little closet that is closer to my bed" "Oh the little closet?" I asked. "Yeah, there is the little closet and the big closet. The little closet is where I keep my vintage nightgowns and a lot of fabulous shoes too." She snickered, a girlie giggle. "I put all the things I wear most often in the little closet," Dita said. I didn't ask another question. Just think about how a peek at an ankle and a little leg from a line of can-can dancing girls in an 1890s saloon was once the biggest thrill in a cowtown, and then think of all those modern ankle, foot and toe, heels and hose pay Web sites. Somewhere in between is the creation that is Dita. She's an image that is about to get even bigger, with several big cameo movie appearances being offered her way these days. Find a picture of her perfect, creamy skin, and watch out, you'll melt fast. The devil begs to be tied down. STEP INSIDE! Dita is due to feed men and women their hearts on a plate with tasty acts this Valentine's Day. There will be plenty of helpings of tunes and sideshow attractions in this dinner theater of sorts. Fire-breathing and balloon-swallowing Donny Vomit couldn't miss this one. He has some new marvels that make one ponder questions like How? Why? Donny V. lately has been putting his fingers in a real bear trap, and then, oh no, stop! Too late. His tongue! The recorded musical interludes inside the historic cinema walls may include music from the likes of Lew Raymond and His Orchestra to torch singers Peggy Lee and Julie London and more! The Will Rogers Theater walls were erected in 1946, but not as damn straight as this! Other heartthrobs on the bill: Early Sun Studios Elvis-lives frontman Brian Dunning, piano-pounding and smooth-singing Mitchell C Hamilton, and the rest of The Poison Okies, who will have no problem doing "The Hunch." This date with Dita features a Marilyn and a Manson, don't worry. A real dual sweetheart deal. Jami Deadly conjures the steamy likeness of Marilyn Monroe. Speaking of hairpin curves, Redd Gypsy Vayne, formerly of Denver's Burlesque As It Was and now of Dallas, is another dance doll on this bill. Designate a driver. The Rowdymen, a dapper Canadian rockabilly outfit, are driving all night from Minneapolis to get there, but they won't need any trucker's bop pills to keep them going on this night! John Manson and his cohorts, Billy Joe Winghead, are lucky enough to be squeezed in between two of Dita von Teese's sweeter-than-an-I-Love-You-sucker dances. Dita has said she's been wanting to perform for "the average Joe." This Billy Joe is about as average as a doorbell that plays 50s sci-fi movie soundtracks. Dita von Teese won't stop at just one walk over Will Rogers. Soon the whole stage is her domain. The Queen is coming! Roll out the pink carpet. Pierced by Cupid's flaming arrows, A Red Hot Revival might burn this barn down! For tickets see www.okctickets.com. Visit the Dita von Teese website.