Is he saying "No, not yet" or "No, not ever" ?

If he's saying "No, not yet", he may genuinely want to get to know you better first. I don't know how long you have been talking on email. If it's just a few days, then this may be reasonable - in which case give it a while longer.

If it's several weeks, then it probably isn't reasonable. It is possible to meet too soon, before getting to know each other a little by email first. But it's also possible to wait too long. You don't get the full story about a person over email, even when both sides are being very open and honest with each other. As the email relationship goes on, both sides start "projecting" their ideas about what they want onto the person. Which can lead to problems later on.

If he is saying "No, not ever", there may be many different reasons for this. Some people online are looking just for friendship or email contact and are simply afraid to meet out of shyness or even fear. Some people have more significant reasons why they won't meet - such as already being in a relationship, or if they have been less than honest about themselves and know they will be found out. But, whatever his reasons, right now he isn't making himself available for a relationship with you.

In terms of what you should do - I certainly wouldn't push the issue - if he doesn't want to meet, then he doesn't want to meet - whatever his reasons may be. So you should feel free to start looking around and talking to new people who are available and ready to meet people.

I know this may feel disappointing if you felt you were getting on well. But moving on now will save you a lot of time in the long run. I'm sure you will find other people who will want to talk to you and be ready to take a relationship to the next stage. Best of luck.

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