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Funny Jokes

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Newest Jokes

A lawyer is standing in a long line at the post office. Suddenly, he feels a pair of hands kneading his shoulders, back, and neck. The lawyer turns around. "What the hell do you think you're doing?"

"I'm a chiropractor says the man. I'm just keeping in practice while I'm waiting in line."

"Well, I'm a lawyer, but you don't see me screwing the guy in front of me."
Category:Lawyer Jokes || Rated:3.52 || Votes:29 || Send this to a Friend!

 
A blonde and a lawyer sit next to each other on a plane. The lawyer asks her to play a game. If he asked her a question that she didn't know the answer to, she would have to pay him five dollars; And every time the blonde asked the lawyer a question that he didn't know the answer to, the lawyer had to pay the blonde 50 dollars. So the lawyer asked the blonde his first question, "What is the distance between the Earth and the nearest star?" Without a word the blonde pays the lawyer five dollars. The blonde then asks him, "What goes up a hill with four legs and down a hill with three?" The lawyer thinks about it, but finally gives up and pays the blonde 50 dollars. Then the lawyer asked her what the answer was and without a word the blonde gave the lawyer five dollars.
Category:Lawyer Jokes || Rated:4.13 || Votes:8 || Send this to a Friend!

 
Q: What's the difference between a dead lawer in the middle of the road and a dead rattlesnake in the middle of the road?

A: There is skid marks before the snake
Category:Lawyer Jokes || Rated:3.2 || Votes:5 || Send this to a Friend!

 
What happens when a lawyer takes viagra?

They grow taller.
Category:Lawyer Jokes || Rated:4 || Votes:4 || Send this to a Friend!

 
The pope and a lawyer are on the elevator to heaven. When they arrive at the gates, there's a mad rush of angels, saints, and other holy people on their way to greet them.

When they arrive, they pick the lawyer up on their shoulders and carry him off cheering hysterically. The pope is deeply saddened.

St. Peter sees this and goes over to him and says, "Don't feel bad. We get popes in here all the time, it's not every day we get a lawyer."
Category:Lawyer Jokes || Rated:2.83 || Votes:6 || Send this to a Friend!

 

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