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Back to School

By Michelle Donaghey


But I don’t want to go!

Tips to help younger children going to school 

It’s time for reading, writing, arithmetic and new friends! It’s back to school time!

Can you remember your first school day or first day in the first grade? Maybe you rode the bus for the first time or you walked all by yourself a few blocks waiting in anticipation for the bell to ring so you could tell all the other kids about your new shoes, outfit or backpack. For some kids the first day has been something they have been looking forward to for weeks while others dread having to leave their mommy, daddy, brothers and sisters or grandparents, some for the first time.

Whether your little one is starting school for the first time or is returning after their first year as a kindergarten student, this year is a brand new slate on which you can write pleasant, exciting memories instead of stressful, scary nightmares.  Taking time considering the personality and expectations of your child and other factors, you can take steps to make it the best year ever. 

Consider your child’s personality  

Face it, not all children are outgoing, bubbly and ready to absorb everything a teacher has to offer. Some kids are just plain scared. “Every child is different,” says teacher, Holly Yoder, explaining that while some children are “slow to warm up” others are “ready and raring to go.” Children who are people pleasers should not be talked to constantly about what they should or should not do at school when it starts. Keep it low key for these kids please! When getting ready for that first day, some kids love to talk about it incessantly while others just get more apprehensive. You know best what will work for your little one!   

Do your research! Go to orientations! 

If possible, find out beforehand about what to expect in kindergarten or first grade. Ask the school and or teacher what a typical day is like. Let the teacher know about your child and his or her habits, likes, and dislikes. Some schools sometimes offer a time when children can come and meet their teacher and see their classroom. Orientations such as these are not only good for your child, but also for you as a parent so you can connect with his or her teacher before a hectic school year starts.

Smaller children enjoy knowing that they will have their own personal space at the school which they anticipate seeing their first days. If your child will have their own desk, locker or cubby space, be sure to point it out when visiting the school. 

Prepare school bus riders and walkers! 

Being away from home is often traumatic to younger children, especially if they are riding a school bus. If your child is riding the bus, see if you can meet the bus driver before school starts. Find out if there are any other children his or her age that will ride the bus so you can meet them. Be sure to tell them about bus safety. (See box.) To help your child feel even more at ease, find out the route and drive it, pointing out what he or she will be seeing everyday to and from school. Explain that someone whether it is a babysitter, you or another family member will be waiting when they are dropped off in the afternoon. Most importantly, make sure that your child understands that if they miss their bus, the school will help them to find a ride home if they go to the office and explain. 

Children who walk home can be equally, if not more, afraid. Younger children can walk to and from school but often should have an older friend or sibling when they are in the younger grade levels- much depends on your child’s personality and maturity. Even if he or she walks with someone, be sure to walk the route to and from school together. Make sure that your child knows and understands the route thoroughly without your help. Explain that they should NEVER divert from their route and should NEVER talk to strangers. Talk about traffic and safety, especially about looking both ways!  If your town participates in a SAFE HOUSE program, find out where the safe houses are and point them out in case your child is caught in a major storm, falls and needs a Band-Aid or is scared they are being watched or followed.  

Talk about the important stuff-especially to kindergartners! 

Before the first day there are some important things that you should talk about before they start their first day so that everything will go smoothly and they don’t come home in tears. To your child, these matter much more than the crayons, outfit or special backpack. 

Snacks and lunch 

Some schools have snack times where your child can bring something from home. If that is the case, talk to your child and find out what he or she would like to bring. If the school provides the snack, ask when your child will be given the snack and what kind of snacks to expect. Caitlin may not like apples and apples may be the chosen snack of the day. It’s better to know ahead of time.

Does your child know how to pour something from a pitcher? If not, practice because sometimes children are asked to help the teacher. Can he or she open a straw easily for a juice box or bag? They may sound like little things, but to your child, these are the kind of things that they worry about.  

Bathroom and playground rules 

Does your child know how they can ask to use the restroom? More importantly, do they know where the restroom is in their classroom? It can be embarrassing if they don’t know when they can go to the bathroom. If your child is prone to accidents, be sure to send some extra clothes that can be stored or given to the teacher to keep.

On the playground, there often are many children from different grade levels. Let your child know if his or her class has recess alone. Tell your child that they can let a teacher who isn’t their teacher or a playground aide know if they are being picked on or if they fall down and get hurt.  

Naps 

If your child is used to taking a nap and the school day doesn’t allow for rest times, make sure that he or she is well rested. Be sure to follow the same schedule on weekends to make it easier- if bedtime is 8 p.m., keep it at that time on Saturday and Sunday nights!

Some schools do allow for naps. Ask whether or not naps are taken on the floor and if mats and /or pillows are provided. Does the teacher allow special things from home such as stuffed animals? If so, pick out something that will help your child feel at ease and happy. 

Shoes, snaps, boots and more 

The ABC’s and 123’s are good to know, but little ones should also know how to take care of themselves as much as possible says Tracy Tredway, an Elementary-Middle School Principal from Indiana. “It helps so much if the children know how to put their shoes on and off and tie or Velcro them. In the cooler months, they should know how to be able to zip their coats and put on their boots. Half of the recess time at school is sometimes taken with teachers helping the kids with their outerwear,” noted Tredway. "If a child knows how to do things for themselves they end up feeling great about what they can do and ultimately that makes them feel great about school” added Tredway.  

Review for older children 

First graders (and some older kids) may feel experienced, but they too can be a little scared, especially if they are attending school for a full day for the first time or are new to a school.

Brown bag or hot? 

If they are packing a lunch, make sure that you choose items together so they know what will be in their bag or lunchbox. Those who have lunch at school should have money in their account at school or should have it in an accessible, easy to remember spot in their coat or backpack. Parents should let their child know in advance whether they can buy items in the cafeteria as they please. “Many lunch accounts are in the red without a parent realizing it. Some children buy extra items besides the lunch such as cookies and granola bars,” says a lunch aide, Amy Stouder. 

Rules in retro 

Even though they have a year’s worth of experience under their belt, parents should again go over playground and classroom rules. If the school has made any changes such as where different grade levels are to wait until the bell rings, parents should make sure their child knows about them.

                “Students who understand and follow the rules are happier which makes happy teachers and happy parents,” says retired schoolteacher, Susan Cole.
  

Michelle Donaghey is a freelance writer and mother of
two boys, Chris and Patrick, who are her inspiration. She lives in Bremen, Indiana just south of South Bend, home of Notre
Dame. When she isn't writing, Michelle can be found in
her perennial flower garden or working on small home improvement projects. Michelle has written for parenting
publications including Metro Kids, Atlanta Parent,
Dallas Child, Great Lakes Family, Family Times and Space Coast Parent and websites including iparenting.com.


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