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FAQ: Child
Safety
What
are the most important things parents should tell children about safety?
- Always check first with a parent, guardian, or trusted
adult before going anywhere, accepting anything, or getting into a car
with anyone.
- Do not go out alone. Always take a friend with when
going places or playing outside.
- Say no if someone tries to touch you, or treats you
in a way that makes you feel scared, uncomfortable, or confused. Get
out of the situation as quickly as possible.
- Tell a parent, guardian, or trusted adult if you
feel scared, uncomfortable, or confused.
- There will always be someone to help you, and you
have the right to be safe.
What
should a parent know when talking to a child about safety?
- Don’t forget your older children. Children
aged 11 to17 are equally at risk to victimization. At the same time
you are giving your older children more freedom, make sure they understand
important safety rules as well.
- Speak to your children in manner that is calm and non-threatening.
Children do not need to be frightened to get the point across. In fact,
fear can thwart the safety message, because fear can be paralyzing to
a child.
- Speak openly. Children will be less likely to come
to you about issues enshrouded in secrecy. If they feel that you are
comfortable discussing the subject at hand, they may be more forthcoming.
- Do not teach “stranger danger.” Children
do not have the same understanding of “strangers” as adults;
the concept is difficult for them to grasp. And, based on what we know
about those who harm children, people known to children and/or their
families actually present greater danger to children than do “strangers.”
- Practice what you preach. You may think your children
understand your message, but until they can incorporate it into their
daily lives, it may not be clearly understood. Find opportunities to
practice “what if” scenarios.
- Teach your children that safety is more important than manners.
In other words, it is more important for children to get themselves
out of a threatening situation than it is to be polite. They also need
to know that it is okay to tell you what happened, and they won’t
be tattletales.
Is
"stranger danger"—that dangers to kids come from strangers—really
a myth?
Yes. In the majority of cases, the perpetrator is someone the parents
or child knows, and that person may be in a position of trust or responsibility
to the child and family.
We have learned that children do not have the same understanding of
who a stranger is as an adult might; therefore, it is a difficult concept
for the child to grasp. It is much more beneficial to children to help
them build the confidence and self-esteem they need to stay as safe as
possible in any potentially dangerous situation they encounter rather
than teaching them to be "on the look out" for a particular
type of person.
For decades, parents, guardians, and teachers have told children to "stay
away from strangers" in an effort to keep them safe. In response
to the on-going debate about the effectiveness of such programs, NCMEC
released the research-based Guidelines
for Programs to Reduce Child Victimization: A Resource for Communities
When Choosing a Program to Teach Personal Safety to Children to assist
schools as they select curricula aimed at reducing crimes against children.
What
other advice can you offer parents about talking to kids?
Parents should choose opportunities or “teachable” moments
to reinforce safety skills. If an incident occurs in your community and
your child asks you about it, speak frankly but with reassurance. Explain
to your children that you want to discuss the safety rules with them,
so that they will know what to do if they are ever confronted with a difficult
situation. Make sure you have “safety nets” in place, so that
your children know there is always someone who can help
them.
What
child safety education resources does NCMEC provide?
NCMEC offers a wealth of resources
to help educate parents, children, law enforcement, and the general public
about child safety.
[Safety tips adapted from Know the Rules...General
Parental Tips to Help Keep Your Children Safer. Copyright© 2000 National
Center for Missing & Exploited Children (NCMEC). All rights reserved.]
I
heard about a tracking device for children on a commercial. Is there one
that NCMEC recommends?
Consumers need to understand that the first line of defense for families
is safety education and line-of-sight supervision of their children. If
a device is to be used, understand what it can do and cannot do, that
machines can fail, and that the tracking device should be, if they choose,
an element within a complete safety program for their family.
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