the radioactive chicken heads100% Genetically Modified Rock 'N' Roll


Nobody really paid much attention to the high-tension electromagnetic power lines stretching over or those weird government scientist dudes doing experiments late at night on Uncle Max's farm until one morning when Uncle Max sent Joe out to the field fetch him some carrots to use in his famous carrot pancakes. Joe tugged and tugged with all his might on a stubborn old carrot until finally he uprooted a 7 foot tall vegetable man! The newborn Carrot Topp (no relation to the standup comedian) stayed true to his underground roots and started up a punk rock band called the Vegamatics with three other recently harvested mutant veggies, Cherry Tomato, Syd Radish, and Celery Stixx. But unfortunately for the band, the radiation had also caused a cute fuzzy little bunny rabbit to mutate into a ferocious ten ton mega-monster...Bad Bunny! Bad Bunny was the baddest bunny to ever hop on the face of the earth. Bad Bunny raided the Vegamatics' rehearsal barn and munched up the whole group except for Carrot, who narrowly escaped Bad Bunny's appetite for destruction and vegetables.

By the next spring, Carrot Topp was working on his spoken-word album, and Joe was getting ever so excited about the farm's annual Easter egg hunt. In a bar room brawl, Bad Bunny beat the bejeezus out of the Easter Bunny and stole his threads. Now disguised as the Easter Bunny, Bad Bunny continued his evil reign of badness by sabotaging the Easter egg hunt. First, he ate up all the gooey chocolate eggs from the real Easter Bunny's basket. Then, he replaced them with some "bad eggs" if you know what I mean. In the spirit of total badness, the eggs he delivered that day were no ordinary eggs for this was no ordinary farm and this was no ordinary bunny. You see, Bad Bunny was working for the Man as an undercover agent and he was sent on a mission to pose as the Easter Bunny and deliver these experimental genetically modified super-sized-mega-jumbo eggs. Well, what hatched out of those eggs was something you might call hideous or you might call sick or you might call grotesque, but they'd prefer it if you call them the Radioactive Chicken Heads.

Joe, now an aspiring singer/songwriter, painstakingly taught the chickens how to play guitars, drums, trumpets, and whatever instruments were lying around with plans to get the "man with the chicken band" act, Joe and the Chickens, onto the county fair circuit. It seem liked the band was on the up and up but tensions were growing, fueled by "artistic differences" and the fact that a certain Colonel made Joe a secret offer to trade bags full of dirty money for bags full of giant chicken bodies. Joe finally decided to get a big axe out from the shed and chop off the heads of the chickens. The decapitated chickens' bodies ran away only to be caught but Carrot Topp jumped on a tractor and came to the rescue of his poultry pals. Luckily, he found some decent leftover human bodies while rummaging through the dumpster behind the local cryogenics lab and stayed up to the break of dawn sewing the chickens' heads on them.

The Chicken Heads adopted the personalites of their human bodies: the over-indulgent rocker Puke Boy, Pasta Farian- a bird with a taste for kind herbs like oregano, Sgt. Psychlopps- a one-eyed one-chicken militia, the teenage mutant ninja wannabe Kung Pow Chicken, the unlucky Bird Brain, the undead Poultry Geist, and the deviled egg spawn El Pollo Diablo. Joined forces with Carrot Topp, they formd the ultimate rock 'n' roll supergroup - The Radioactive Chicken Heads! Now they could finally boogie board their way to fame and fortune and more fame.

To be continued...

In the next episode: The Chicken Heads prepare for a Battle of the Bands with Bad Bunny's evil heavy metal band, Lagamorf



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