GARTH MARENGHI'S DARKPLACE
Debut Thursday 29 January 2004, Channel 4
Spoof black comedy series set in a Romford hospital which, we are led to believe, was a cult hit in the 1980s, even though it was too terrifying and radical to be shown (apart from a brief run in Peru. In the UK, it was replaced by reruns of Who's The Boss?). It is also too awful, with bad scripts, bad acting and bad dubbing. Channel 4 airs six of the 50 episodes, accompanied by interviews with the people involved.

Darkplace was written and directed by Garth Marenghi, writer of best-selling horrors such as The Ooze, Afterbirth and Black Fang, who also stars as the show’s lead character, Dr Rick Dagless MD, who is battling against the evil forces lurking at his hospital in Romford.
Darkplace was “too subversive, too dangerous, too damn scary," according to Marenghi and was believed to have been cursed – with six deaths and three nervous breakdowns during the production – although Marenghi blames a government conspiracy for the misfortunes.
Made by Avalon Television.

The cast
Matthew Holness as Garth Marenghi as ex-warlock Rick Dagless MD, a maverick doctor haunted by past demons who has to "fight the forces of evil and deal with the day-to-day admin"
Richard Ayoade as Dean Learner as hospital boss Thornton Reed, Dagless's tough boss, a former POW in Korea whose injuries prevent him from working as a medic
Matt Berry as Todd Rivers as Dr Lucien Sanchez, a hotshot surgeon who served alongside Dagless in Vietnam and is an expert in martial arts and Eastern lore
Alice Lowe as Madeleine Wool (who vanished during the production and is presumed dead) as Dr Liz Asher, who has psychic powers but is emotionally unstable.

Episode guide
Once Upon A Beginning Garth Marenghi introduces his long-lost TV project. New doctor Liz Asher gets a tip-off from a psychic cat that there’s darkness in Darkplace and, when a patient mysteriously dies, Dr Rick Dagless MD begins his fight against The Forces of Evil.
Hell Hath Fury Dr Rick Dagless MD and temporary clerk Clive investigate when the hospital chef (played by The Office co-writer Stephen Merchant) is savagely attacked by a ladle and other objects are flying about and attacking innocent patients. He discovers the culprit is Liz, using her psychokinetic abilities after having to wait three hours for chicken in the canteen.
Skipper The Eye Child Something long dead – a giant eye – has been reborn on B Wing, so Dr Rick Dagless MD tries to discover whether it's a macabre sign, a terrible warning or a sacred gift from the gods.
The Apes Of Wrath A terrible sickness is spreading from ward to ward in the hospital, causing patients and staff to regress to a primal state. Dr Rick Dagless MD endeavours to find out why this is happening.
Scotch Mist A strange killer mist is surrounding Darkplace, causing people to turn tartan and filling the air with phantom bagpipes. Dr Rick Dagless MD tries to unravel the secret behind its sudden appearance.
The Creeping Moss From The Shores Of Shuggoth Garth Marenghi introduces the last episode of his hospital horror series. Dr Sanchez has fallen in love with a patient infected with cosmic broccoli, which is now spreading. Dr Rick Dagless MD is forced to intervene.

GHOST SQUAD
Debut Tuesday 15 November 2005, Channel 4
Drama series from Company Pictures, the makers of Shameless, looking at modern policing in the UK. In each of the eight episodes, the Ghost Squad of undercover, internal investigators are planted within forces around the country to examine corruption within police ranks.
Creator Tom Grieves says: “I wanted to create a series of thought-provoking thrillers, which have a complex morality to them. They should make the audience question their own standards of right and wrong, good and bad – just as [central character] Amy does.”

The cast
Elaine Cassidy as Amy Harris, a young and idealistic undercover detective
Emma Fielding as tough, successful Detective Superintendent Carol McKay
Christine Tremarco as Amy's best friend Jo
Jonas Armstrong as Pete, Amy’s shadow and support in the Ghost Squad who is a thrill-seeker with a dangerous edge.
Episode guide
One Of Us: The routine arrest of young Asian Rakesh turns into a murder investigation when Amy finds him alone in the police interview room beaten, battered and drowned in his own blood.
Hardcore: Amy investigates a team of cops who've been working undercover for months, tracking a network of sex traffickers. Carol believes that one or more of the team have changed allegiances. So Amy is forced to keep an eye on the deep undercover trio of DI Mike Pearce (Cal Macaninch), Kate (Donna Alexander) and Billy (Brooks Livermore).
Heroes: When Sergeant Ralph Allen (Brendan Coyle) displays an admirable sense of duty in removing the scourge of a teenage gang from the streets, Amy has doubts about adhering to McKay’s demand that she find enough evidence to have the “dinosaur” kicked out of the police force. Meanwhile McKay, discovers that Amy is having an affair with married Deputy Assistant Commissioner Robert Townsend (James Weber Brown).
The Greater Good: Amy is sent to investigate the conduct of Sally Marshall (Clare Holman), a senior police officer in line for promotion. Amy’s brief is to deduce just how genuine Sally’s impressive conviction rate is, is it superb policing or does she frame suspects? But Amy’s job is compromised when she spots Sally talking with her boyfriend Robert (James Weber Brown).
Firewall: Amy must find out which member of witness protection unit is discouraging a vital witness from giving evidence at the trial of Warren Cole. As Amy babysits the witness, she is shocked when a wreath with his name arrives at the safehouse, prompting her to act fast in snaring the culprit.
Necessary Means: Amy is sent to investigate the conduct of PC Sarah Houghton (Neve McIntosh) who is spending far more than her copper’s salary. But Amy soon discovers Sarah is the victim of oppressive chauvinism at her station, and the main culprit is Sarah’s abusive lover DS Vinny Thomas (Joseph Millson).
Colour Blind: Amy takes on Gus Philips (Adrian Lester), one of the few black DIs in the Metropolitan Police who has been accused of sleeping with his informant Geeta Patel (Samantha Schefele), dealing drugs, pimping prostitutes and using the local estate as his own personal kingdom.

GOOD GIRLS DON'T
Debuts Tuesday 7 September 2004, 2004, BBC3, and 2005 on BBC2
Controversial US sitcom in which a group of twentysomething friends do anything to get sex. Mixing elements of Sex And The City and British shows Coupling and Absolutely Fabulous, the series features Marjorie and Jane, two girls from Minnesota who share an LA apartment.
BBC bought the show after just a couple of episodes had aired on Oprah Winfrey’s Oxygen cable network in the US. It comes from the team that also created That '70s Show and was originally called My Best Friend Is A Big Fat Slut.

The cast
Bree Turner as Marjorie
Joy Gohring as "big fat slut" Jane
Kevin Christy as shy Ben
Brent King as Davis
Nichole Hiltz as Lizzie

GRASS
Debuted Monday 8 September 2003, BBC3
Airs from Saturday 17 January 2004, BBC2
Dark sitcom starring Simon Day as his The Fast Show character Billy Bleach (catchphrase "Someone sittin' there, mate?").
The know-all Londoner has witnessed a murder carried out by gangster Harry Taylor and is coerced into testifying, with the witness protection programme to keep him safe. Billy dreams of going to an exotic location, but first he's off to Norfolk.
Written by Simon Day with EastEnders writer/radio presenter Andrew Collins.

The cast
Simon Day as Billy Bleach, 41, the interfering, ginger-haired Cockney know-all Billy Bleach
Robert Wilfort as PC Harriet, a keen-as-mustard, naive young East Anglian cop. Nicknamed Heartbeat by Billy.
Philip Jackson as DCI Leonard 'Lennie' Maddox, an old-school cop who is being taught new ways by his younger partner
Tristan Gemmill as DI Marco Veal, Lennie's pretentious partner who is keen to make his boss more refined
Mark Williams as Ben Gardener, the landlord at the local pub The Cross Hare which incorporates the pretentious restaurant Le Bateau Jus Viande
Josephine Butler as the village vet Jemima
David Webber as Youssou Fadele, the Moroccan chef at Le Bateau Jus Viande, who likes painting and fables
Matthew Ashforde as Billy's brother Darren, who is in jail, having taken the rap for one of Harry Taylor's crimes
Vilma Hollingbery as Billy's old ma Rose
Ian Burfield as gangster Harry Taylor, who has known Billy since they were at school together
Liam Hess as Crispin Winterville, the eerie son of organic farmers Rowan and Lucy. He has premonitions and a hamster called Tantalus

Episode guide
1 – Billy is spirited off to an isolated cottage in Little Mockwell, Norfolk as part of a witness protection scheme, with only the local copper PC Harriet for company.
2 – Billy escapes from PC Harriet and the house in Little Mockwell where he's hiding under the witness protection programme. He ends up in the local pub and meets sweet vet Jemima.
3 – Billy gets away from his Norfolk hide-out and meets a strange family of organic farmers. Meanwhile, Harry Taylor hires hitmen Eric and Sunshine to track down Billy.
4 – Billy takes on a new persona – poet Peter Jones – and helps out vet Jemima when she's stuck without a receptionist. Meanwhile, his brother Darren is moved to a high-security prison.
5 – Billy – in his new guise as poet Peter Jones – holds a poetry evening in The Cross Hare. Meanwhile, Billy's brother Darren is on the run and villains Sunshine and Eric are closing in.
6 – The pub stages its first Poetry Olympics, with Billy (aka Peter Jones) in charge. Meanwhile, the cops who are meant to be protecting him are having a tiff, and nasty Eric is closing in.
7 – Billy asks vet Jemima round for a cosy dinner at the cottage but things don't go according to plan. Meanwhile, PC Harriet meets a stranger in the pub and the relationship between the
Maddox and Veal is strained.
8 – Billy is just a week away from giving evidence in the murder trial, but killer Harry Taylor's hitman has tracked him down. Meanwhile, PC Harriet is forced to tell Billy where he'll be going under the witness protection programme.

GREASE MONKEYS
Debuted 10.30pm Tuesday 15 April, BBC3
Returns 10.00pm Sunday 19 September
Surreal, smart comedy about an Asian family in Manchester who run the Grand Trunk Garage, written by Harwant Bains, based on the hit Radio 4 series of the same name.
The cast
Mark Zuber as patriarch Mo Dhillon
Archi Panjabi as Mo's beautiful daughter Rita, who is more interested by cars than boys
Ahsen Bhatti as Mo's irresponsible, sex-mad salesman son Dave who dabbles in petty crime
Indira Joshi as Mo's dead wife Jasbir (who appears in flashback)
Jake Wood as Dave's crooked best mate Happy, an idiotic smalltime crook
Nicky Ladanowski as Happy's lap dancer wife Mand, and mother of their baby Edwin
A talking dog.
Episode guide
Series one
Double Vision An unhappy customer drops dead, which means Dave doesn't have to worry about the complaint, but does have a dead body to dispose of.
Last Man Standing Jeremy Sheffield from Holby City guests as the flashy, smooth-talking Mark, who makes a play for Rita – which distresses Dave – and hires hard-up Mand to work at his lapdancing club – which humiliates Happy.
Different Strokes Rita is horrified when she catches Dave masturbating and he's worried she'll ruin his reputation as a success with the ladies. Can cabaret hypnotist Wayne King make her forget?
Almost Blue Amita Dhiri guests as the love of Dave's life. She's now married and living in luxury but sparks still fly between the pair. Meanwhile, Mo wants to marry off his daughter Rita.
The Cut And Shut Dave and Happy are being watched as they undertake new dodgy business dealings.
Heart of the Matter Mo settles down to watch a late-night movie, but his dead wife Jasbir turns up to disturb his peace.

Series two
Jail Bait Dave convinces old pal Trevor (Karl Collins) to come and work for him as a car salesman after his release from prison.
Delhi Belly Mo’s late wife Jasbir appears in Pinky’s dreams to inform her that Mo can start to look for a new partner – and Pinky gets to work to ensure that she is the lucky lady.
Little Star: Dave faces a dilemma as he must choose between a date with a nurse or help deliver a goth’s baby, a deed that will also get him back in Rita’s good books. Reunion: Rita and Dave attend a school reunion where he runs into a vengeful former girlfriend. Meanwhile, Mo and Pinky aim to help the community through their new milk round.
Power And Passion: Rita gets the hump with Dave when he considers selling the garage to property developer Nathan, but is swayed when he saves her life. And Dave also finds a new incentive to sell when he is seduced by Nathan’s wife Miranda.
Gray Days: As Dave bemoans his approaching 30th birthday, his relationship with Mo is put under strain by the arrival of a cousin from India. But later Mo discovers his cousin isn’t as traditional as he first appears.
Middleman: Love is in the air for the Dhillons, unfortunately it’s the fetid air of distrust and deceit. While headhunting Trevor for a job, rival car salesman Rocco takes a shine to Rita; Dave is humiliated after an old lady reveals they are a couple; and Ada is convinced husband Bertrand is up to no good with another lady.
Love Bug: When a devastated Trevor is kicked out by his parents, Rita helps him find a flat and a new lover – her. Shocked at the interracial relationship, Mo, egged on by bigoted Marley Bob, voices his disapproval.

GREEN WING
Autumn 2004/Spring 2006, Channel 4
Surreal soap/comedy drama from the Smack The Pony production team, set in a hospital. Devised and produced by Victoria Pile (whose credits include Spitting Image, Smack The Pony and Los Dos Bros)
The cast
Tamsin Greig as Dr Caroline Todd, a new surgical registrar
Julian Rhind-Tutt as charmer Dr Macartney
Mark Heap as Dr Alan Statham, a consultant in imaging and radiology
Stephan Mangan as self-obsessed anaesthetist Dr Guillaume Secretan
Pippa Heywood as Joanna Clore, head of human resources
Sarah Alexander as Dr Angela Hunter, the senior registrar in paediatrics
Karl Theobald as house officer Dr Martin Dear
Michelle Gomez as horrendous staff liaison officer Sue White
Oliver Chris as junior house officer Boyce
Sally Bretton as Kim Alabaster
Olivia Coleman as Harriet 'Mumsy' Schulenburg
Katie Lyons as Naughty Rachel
Luncinda Raikes as Karen Ball

Episode guide
Series one
Caroline’s First Day: New surgical registrar Dr Caroline Todd arrives for her first day at the hospital in a terrible state, having spent the night in her car. Guy, the smooth-talking anaesthetist, offers her a bed for the night, but she then leaves a “monster that won’t go down” in his toilet.
Rumours: Caroline tries to stop the gossip about her innocent night at Guy’s flat – but he's encouraging the rumours. Meanwhile, Martin Dear forgets about revision to hunt the thief who stole the Fruits of the Forest yoghurt and find any women who'll have him.
Lodgers: Joanna is getting bored with her dangerous relationship with Alan Statham. Mac discovers his ex-girlfriend is pregnant, and Caroline is desperate to find a lodger, as long as it's not Angela.
Joanna’s Birthday: Joanna thinks she's got a present from the gorgeous Lyndon Jones from the IT department. The women discover Guy has compiled a fanciability league table.
Housewarming Party: Martin needs something decent to wear to Caroline’s housewarming party. Meanwhile, Joanna's desperation to spice up her life leads to her being kidnapped by balaclava-wearing Statham.
Tests: Joanna and Harriet are both convinced they are pregnant, Martin resits his exams for the 100th time, Mac surreptitiously seeks promotion, Caroline can't live down her behaviour at her party, Joanna ditches Statham, who is so upset he steals a milk float.
Tangled Webs: Caroline is broody, but is unsure about Guy and Mac. Meanwhile, Martin gets his exam results and Statham takes an interest in attractive chaplain Cordelia (Saskia Wickam).
Slave Auction: Complicated relationship problems preoccupy the hospital staff. Martin loves Caroline, who loves Mac, who has a girlfriend and has another admirer, Sue White. Joanna loves Lyndon, and Guy pretends to love Caroline. So it needs a charity slave auction to sort it all out. Joanna buys Lyndon for £5000, Martin spends£3000 on Caroline, Guy goes for £30 to Sue Little and Boyce snaps up Alan for 30p.
Emergency: Joanna is desperate to woo Statham and Caroline is desperate to woo Mac, while a tragedy awaits everyone.

Series two
1 – Everyone is dealing with the unenviable task of clearing up the mess they left behind at the end of series one when a trip to the seaside in a stolen ambulance had devastating consequences. Caroline is struggling to come to terms with the outcome, while Joanna has to come to terms with the fact that she accidentally slept with her son.
2 – Guy has to cope without a driving licence and Statham has to live without sex; and Caroline's career hits the skids.
3 – A documentary crew visits the hospital, wanting everyone just to act normally; Sue makes life hell for Joanna and Guy; and a penniless Martin makes cash by becoming a sperm donor.
4 – Guy is in need of accommodation, while a new member of staff upsets the tranquility of the hospital.
5 – Dr Statham gets involved in politics, Caroline regrets her choice of lodger, Mac's past catches up with him, and Martin becomes a pimp.
6 – Statham is unusually cheerful, Mac struggles in his new role, Martin hires a private detective, Caroline has a hot date, leaving Guy green with envy. The episode culiminates in bloodshed and a death.
7 – Caroline has to be cruel to be kind; Joanna and Statham struggle to conceal the incident with the stuffed heron; Sue does some detective work; and Martin comes into some money.
8 – The series ends with paranoia at breaking point for Joanna and Statham who are forced to take drastic action; while Mac, Guy and Martin make Caroline an offer she can't refuse.

The Green Wing Hospital league table
Three stars
Sue White A stunning performance from Michelle Gomez as the barking mad staff liaison officer. Superb physical comedy typified by her attempts to kill Caroline with a fake beard and a crossbow and impress Mac by showing off her behind while "filing".
Dr Guillaume 'Guy' Secretain Stephen Mangan shines as the creepy Swiss anaethestist who almost persuades Caroline that he fancies her. He can’t do a Geordie accent to save his life, though.
Joanna Clore Pippa Haywood’s sex obsessed (aren’t they all in this?) HR director starts of having an affair with Alan and then becomes obsessed with IT manager Lyndon, who can’t stand her. Looks great in a leather jacket and boots. Funniest trait: staring at her underlings through the Venetian blind in her office.
Dr Alan Statham Mark Heap provided one of the funniest moments of the year when Alan tried to hang himself after Joanna gave him the elbow by answerphone – "You will never feel my supervagina again’. Is at his best when he's ranting "slitty slutty slots!!!" or mumbling excuses for his eccentric behaviour.
Two stars
Dr Caroline Todd The new girl and centrepiece of the action (Tamsin Greig). Very funny when drunk and with a hangover, but can’t decide who she wants to go to bed with.
Dr Macartney Julian Rhind-Tutt’s super smooth surgeon seems to have the best of all worlds until Sue White gets the hots for him. He spent most of this week’s episode trying to get away from her.
Boyce Oliver Chris's junior doctor has one main aim in life – winding Alan up. He ended up winning him in a charity slave auction – for 30p. They ended in bed together pissed.
One star
Harriet Schulenburg The mumsy bird with the mad kids played by Olivia Colman. Provided the odd giggle when she and Joanna both thought they were pregnant and the test results got mixed up.
Dr Martin Dear Karl Theobald’s wimpy junior doctor is always failing – with his exams and with the girls. Loves Caroline but she doesn’t care. The butt of Secretain’s many jokes.
No stars
Dr Angela Hunter We can't see the point of this character at all, other than using Sarah Alexander to play her might have drawn in a few Coupling viewers. Waste of her time.

THE GRID
Aired 7-9 September 2004, BBC2
Three part mini-series starring Julianna Margulies and Dylan McDermott about an attempt by three American and two British counter-terrorism agents to bring down a terrorist cell bent on destroying the world's economic foundations. Muslim criminal mastermind Mohammad is leading the plot – and he'll stop at nothing to destroy the Western world, using teenage extremists as suicide bombers.

The script, by Ken Friedman, Patrick Sheane Duncan and Joshua Brand, is based on a story by Tracey Alexander and Friedman. The series was made in early 2004 in Toronto, London and Morocco.

The cast
Julianna Margulies as maverick National Security Agency counter-terrorism operative Maren Jackson
Dylan McDermott as FBI special agent Mike Canary
Piter Marek as CIA analyst Raza Michaels
Bernard Hill as MI5 senior director of counter-terrorism Derek Jennings
Jemma Redgrave as MI6 director of operations Emily Tuthill
Alki David as Muhammad
James Remar as Maren's oil mogul boyfriend Hud Benoit
Silas Carson as Raghib Mutar
Barna Moricz as Kaz Moore
Episode guide
One The agents are assembled after a terrorist attack in London while a Muslim doctor must decide how far he is willing to go for his faith when the ex-Al Quaeda general behind the plot starts recruiting for another attack.
Two Maren's team is disbanded after failing to stop the Lagos bombings, but they continues to work in secret, with Raza and Emily following the money trail from Switzerland to the terrorists. Meanwhile, Derek survives a drive-by shooting in London but his friend is killed.
Three Maren and Mike discover American teenager Kaz is planning an attack in America. Meanwhile, Raghib orchestrates an attack in London and other young Muslims are plotting in Jordan.

GUESS WHO'S COMING TO DINNER?
Debuted 10.00pm Monday 12 May 2003, BBC2
Anne Robinson talks to celebrities about who they'd want to attend a dream dinner party.
Joan Collins chose Marilyn Monroe, John F Kennedy, Cleopatra, Picasso, Sarah Bernhardt and Noel Coward.
Sean Hughes chose Eminem, Samuel Beckett, McMurphy from One Flew Over The Cuckoo's Nest, Bill Hicks, Italian clown Leo Bassi and Oliver Cromwell
Bob Monkhouse chose Walt Disney, Lauren Bacall, his grandfather Frederkick Monkhouse, Dorothy Parker, Phillip II of Macedonia and Jeremy Beadle.
Michael Portillo chose Audrey Hepburn, Lord Byron, Alastair Cooke, Queen Elizabeth, Richard Wagner and Nelson Mandela.
Jo Brand chose Elizabeth Bathory (inspiration for Dracula), Emmeline Pankhurst, Margaret Thatcher, Bessie Smith, Antony (of & Cleopatra fame) and Sigmund Freud.
Rich Hall chose Steve McQueen, Idi Amin, Indian woman Sacajawea, Smokey Robinson, Bill Gates and champion horse Ruffian.
Les Dennis chose John Lennon, Boadicea, Judy Garland, his father, Stan Laurel and David Attenborough.
Ricky Gervais (on the non-broadcast pilot) included Muhammad Ali, Elvis Presley, James Randi and Homer Simpson in his selection

GUNPOWDER, TREASON AND PLOT
Debut Sunday 14 March 2004, BBC2
Drama telling the story behind the Gunpowder Plot and exploring the lives of Mary Queen of Scots and her son James 1, starring Clémence Poésy and Robert Carlyle.
The drama, made in Romania, was written by Jimmy McGovern and directed by Gillies MacKinnon, whose credits include Regeneration, Hideous Kinky and Small Faces.

The cast
Robert Carlyle as James I (James VI of Scotland)
Clémence Poésy as Mary, the short-lived queen who faced battles with her Protestant subjects and the English Queen, Elizabeth 1
Kevin McKidd as the Earl of Bothwell, who Mary gets to kill her husband
Paul Nicholls as Mary's miscreant husband Lord Darnley
Michael Fassbender as Guy Fawkes
Catherine McCormack as Elizabeth 1
Richard Coyle as influential Catholic Robert Catesby
Tim McInnerney as Lord Cecil
Daniella Nardini as Lady Huntly
Emelia Fox as Lord Cecil's spy Lady Margaret
Sira Stampe as Anne of Denmark
Iain Robertson as Huntly
Sam Troughton as Thomas Winter
Richard Harrington as Thomas Percy