!!!DOUBLE POST MONDAY!!! (actually the next one is pretty geeky, its about Linux and repairing a iMac, so if you come here for reasons other then the geekyness you can probably skip it.)
We recently had a lady call and complain that we had stolen her hard drive out of her computer. She had it in the shop because her hard drive was broken in the first place so Im not so quick to dismiss the claim since her HD would have been outside of her computer. I was even willing to work with her.
Till she started yelling, cussing, threatening legal action, without even waiting to see if I was willing to work with her to settle this issue. Im an asshole, and I like making people look as stupid as they really are. Most people dont know how stupid they areits like they have these blinders over their own stupidity but can see plainly most other peoples stupidity. I enjoy removing those blinders, I live for it. I tend to be gentle but when others are assholes Im all about anally raping their stupidity dry with 10 grit sandpaper as a condom with a small amount of icey hot rubbed in for full effect.
After being interupted for the 10th time during the conversation when Im trying to get some basic information such asoh name, and model of computer, size of HD, etc, she just stops me mid question. Finally I snap, Look, either youre going to let me talk or all communication is going to be in writing, Im pretty confident that I could beat you in any courtroom in America but Im willing to work with you, when Im asking you a question thats time for you to listen, your mother probably taught you this skill.
Naturally she had none of it and only got half her reply out before I hung up, something along the lines of maybe I will and maybe I wont.
The important part is I got enough information to look around my shop to see what was up. I found 3 HDs that matched the system stats for her brand and model of computer. 1 is readable by my Linux system but breaks every windows system I try to slave it into, one has a bad Master File Table, and the other is mechanical failure. Im not sure which is hers out of the last 2 so Im trying to do some data recovery work on the first. If that proves fruitless Im handing her the last one.
She calls us up the next day and claims that her video card and some memory is missing as well. Her computer never had a video card in it unless she added it aftermarket and the memory amount she claimed she had wouldnt even work in her system. Needless to say her current configuration sans HD is exactly as the manufacturer describes it in its stat sheet.
So I wrote a nice apology letter basically telling her take this HD and shove it.nicely of course.
In the meantime Ive recieved 7 calls from this lady, each time screaming, each time told that if she doesnt calm down no one is talking to her.
Im going to call her tomorrow and tell her to come pick up all this, my letter, my research into the matter to include the stat sheet, etc, my full name, owners full name, address phone number where papers can be served and times we are open.
today I also found out who she took her computer toohe was a former technician for this company who was fired for theft, guaranteed first words out of her mouth when she took the computer down there was [My company] saw my computer before you guys. and he decided to get some revenge.
Im not a liar or a thief, I stole bubblegum when I was 8, I think I still might have the red mark from that spanking
Reasons you are an idiot:
1.) Youre 55 years old and still havent learned that people stop listening the moment you start screaming and throwing a tantrum like a small child. You may be wearing diapers but a small child this does not make.
2.) At first I believed you, now I think you are either trying to make a money grab or you are listening to bad advisers. Now I think your lying out your teeth until you prove otherwise.
3.) You will probably be real fucking stupid and press criminal charges making me innocent until proven guilty, good luck proving jack or shit in a court when you have 0 documentation and I have enough technical knowledge to run circles around you, your lawyer(s) and any technician you draw into that courtroom from this city.
4.) You left your computer here more then 30 days, the policy you signed states that your computer is mine to do as I please, even if I did take your Hard drive I was atleast nice enough to let you have the rest of the computer. The fact that I didnt scrap your computer should show you Im not being an asshole about itat first.
5.) You think threats scare me, Ive been in a germen prison before for beating up an attempted rapist, he couldnt talk when I was done and the German police didnt understand English, anyone you send after me will wish they hadnt gotten out of bed that morning.
6.) Youve changed your story 4 times in the middle of a single phone call conversation.
7.) You dont think Im recording our phone conversations.
8.) Im sure you have something else that will soon be added to this list really soon.