May 8th was Children’s Mental Health Day. Although that date has passed, we still have an opportunity to stop and acknowledge this enormous problem in our country. The entire month of May is dedicated as Mental Health Month.

According to the Child and Adolescent Bipolar Foundation (CABF), more than one million children and teens suffer from bipolar disorder, and are among the estimated 50 million Americans who experience a mental health ... more

I recently had an interesting discussion with a fellow Mommy about our roles as Mothers. I mentioned that I struggle between being a strict authority figure or a warm fuzzy “you can come to me for anything” type Mama. I don’t want to be a “do as I say not as I do” type Mom but then again I’m seeing so much wrong with kids these days compared to the ideals and values that I grew up with.

My friend felt that you can have it both ways… be best friends and be firm. She feels that she has ... more

For Mother's Day, remember yourself.

This is a hard suggestion for me to follow. It's opposite of many other suggestions that even I've given this year - before I realized I was WRONG.

I have learned to minimize my Mother’s Days since adopting my children. With all of their "mother issues", and because of all of these acting out concerns, it seems easier to “not have a Mother’s Day” than to offer the kids more reminders of all of the other mothers in their past and of their grief/loss ... more

Many adopted children struggle with Mother’s Day issues. Some of the reasons for various feelings have been discussed in other blogs.

We know that adopted children may act out. So, what should we do about it? What can we do to help the child and to help our family?

1. Be aware.

Knowledge is power. We’ve all heard that before. Even so, it’s true. Knowing that our child might act ... more

When I asked around on my personal blog what Adoptive Parents wanted to learn more about Toy and Product reviews came up.It makes sense, everyone likes the Mom tested and kid approved favorites. It seems that there is a overwhelming array of toys and educational products to choose from. There is nothing more frustrating that seeing the toy that you searched for and probably shelled out alot of money on just sit in the corner gathering dust and not being played with.

I often see the same toys at resale shops and thrift stores.I have ... more

It has started.

My children are aware of the impending Day for Mothers.

Tension is tangible; behaviors have taken a veering right from whatever normal we’d managed to achieve by last month.

One girl wanted to mail a previous adoptive mother a card. She realized today that she’d forgotten about this up until now. With this realization, she was even able to use words (something many of my other children are not able to do). “I forgot to mail a card! X*#?!” With the utterance of a swear word, it ... more

Many discussions have taken place about all of the “players” in an adopted child’s story. There are birth parents, adoptive parents, possibly foster parents. In the case of many of my children, there are even previous adoptive parents. There might be siblings in the birth family, siblings in the adopted family, and/or siblings in foster families. There may be many different sets of grandparents as well (or even going on to include aunts/uncles and cousins).

Today, I was reminded of yet another person that might be involved ... more

Seriously folks is it just me who is picky about manners? I just can’t believe the manners or lack of manners with today’s children and in people in general. Maybe it’s just my age. I just grew up with excuse me, please, pardon me, thank you and your welcome for starters. A grown Woman attempted to cut in front of me in line at the grocery store yesterday. Another grown up was yelling at me to get moving simply because I was not a millisecond faster getting my foot from the brake to the gas when the light changed.

It ... more

There are times that I get really worried about my toddlers behavior. It’s her lack of impulse control, not listening and need to control every situation. I’m seeing more manipulative traits and my daughter seems to have an inner need to push the envelope. What she is showing me at 29 months stuns and shocks me... what will the future hold?

I have worked with children for many years and have never met a child like Livi. The Love I have for her is too immense to put into words. She frustrates me and I get frustrated with ... more

What do Moms really want for Mother's day? If you would have asked me prior to coming home with my daughter what I would like to receive for a Mother’s day gift I probably would have rattled off something like- Breakfast in bed, brunch, flowers, Mom jewelry, a special dinner and a nice card .

Those are just a few ideas that I think about when I think about Mother’s day. Today that is far from my mind as Mother’s Day approaches. So what do Moms really want? I can tell you what I would love to receive on that special ... more

As discussed in another blog, it is extremely important for our children that their moms and dads use a team approach in parenting them. This includes current parents, previous parents and birth parents if still actively involved in the child’s life. Children have a finely tuned ability to notice any “weak spots” in the team parenting, hone in on those, and use them to “conquer and divide” or to cause dissension among the adults. This ... more

Have you all seen this article? The report by Salary.com basically adds up the hours and various duties of your average stay- at- home mom and tries to match those duties with an average salary. I imagine it was not an easy task coming up with that ball park figure.

The job descriptions that Salary.com used to determine a moms salary includes 10 jobs that moms do on an average day: housekeeper, day care center teacher, ... more

Mom and Dad. Both parents to the same child. But, are they parenting as a team? Are they partners? (For purpose of this blog, it is assumed that the parents are married. Of course, there are other situations. Hopefully, you can find yourself in this blog, even if not your same situation.)

I think all of us want to be parenting partners with our spouse. Even when our spouse also wants to be a parenting partner, does it always seem like it’s working out the way you’d planned?

Often, I find that my husband and I, ... more

It’s that time of year again. This year we are older and wiser. Last summer my daughter was still falling often and not quite tall enough for most playground equipment. I expect that because my daughter is older and steadier on her feet that this summer will be a real hoot.

1.Come Prepared- sun block, a change of clothes, snacks and water. I’m always stunned when I see Moms come unprepared to the playground and they spend a few hours playing. I envy that type of spontaneous parenting but I can’t leave home without my ... more

Two girls, both Russian-born teenage adoptees have become friends through these blogs. These are two of the most amazing girls, older child adoptees, bent on now giving back to other children without families. I’ve been absolutely inspired by both of them.

A month ago, Virginia wrote on the Russian Adoption blog about her meeting with a fascinating ... more

We have a dog! It’s official. We’ve adopted a pet, a very purposefully selected Labradoodle puppy. We had to fill out paperwork that actually spelled out the pet adoption particulars.

My experiences in the world of adoption have taught me that some folks disapprove of the word “adoption” being used for anything other than a child adoption.

“Those of us who are parents by adoption and adoption activists believe that, in turning upon a kind of "save the rejects" image, such programs trivialize a ... more

I had a light bulb moment recently. I thought I would share it with you all. I realized that I had been making a mistake with Livi. I had fallen into a way of parenting and done what I have seen so many others do. I first realized it when observing my daughter in her occupational and speech therapy playgroup.

I noticed that Livi’s therapist offered her choices several times in the hour long session.Red cup or Green cup…. pick one. White smock or yellow smock.. pick one please. Fish crackers or teddy bear crackers… ... more

Today brought a birthday celebration at our house. Dad is now 40. He’s “officially old”, according to the kids. Normally, we have low-key celebrations for birthdays. I love to celebrate a day as important as a person’s birth. However, as with most other holidays, my kids don’t handle big celebrations. For a birthday as momentous as “the big 4-0” AND since it was for dad, not a child, I broke our unwritten rule and went for a slightly bigger celebration. I worked hard to think of something ... more

I was not raised in an environment big on the reward system. There were no stickers or special treats for everyday actions or chores. It's not that I had a deprived childhood, it’s just that we were not given rewards for tasks or expected behaviors.

I received praise and allowance but for the most part good behavior was expected or demanded. I think my Mom may have had the right idea.It seems children these days are bribed or rewarded for the simplest mundane behavior.

Susie put her coat on so here is a gold star. Tommy ... more

Have you been asked this about your children: “Where are they from?” Or has your child been asked the question?

Is this one of “those questions” that adoptive parents dread? Or is it, instead, a question that is welcomed?

Like with everything else, it probably depends on the person, family and situation. Here’s a situation I experienced today:

At the grocery store, a girl passed by with a t-shirt read “Bad is the new good”. Three teen daughters, all in the states now for ... more