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Monica ON GROWING UP & THE PREGNANCY RUMORS - Brief Article
Ebony, August, 2000 by Kelly Starling
PEOPLE describe her as sophisticated and mature. But spend just a few moments talking with Monica Arnold and you realize that this young woman, just past the brim of adulthood, is more girlish than she appears.
Behind the flawless face and diva persona is a fun-loving Sister who revels in the ordinary pleasures of life. She giggles as she raps with a reporter about her pastimes--going to the movies with her nieces and nephews, sharing dish with one of her closest friends, rapper Mia X, creating music and visiting family near her Atlanta home. The singer gets serious though when the conversation shifts to dating.
At 19, Monica is poised between the worlds of youth and maturity, innocence and knowing. She moved out of her mother's home, and has come a long way from the sassy 14-year-old who exploded onto the music scene with her double-platinum debut album Miss Thang. Like the songs of her sophomore blockbuster, The Boy Is Mine--which has won fans for its portrayal of real-life issues--her life today swells with adult pursuits and challenges.
Some changes are exciting. The slender beauty (she wears a size 2) recently added modeling to her already-packed schedule and has become an icon of style for girls who marvel at her transformation from tomboy-cute to glam.
The Grammy Award-winning singer also has ventured into acting, with a small role in the movie Boys and Girls. This month, she will begin filming an interracial romance called Love Songs for MTV with Justin Timberlake from the group 'N Sync.
Other turns have been more difficult. Monica has felt the grief of losing loved ones, the pain of deception and the sting of rumors--the price of living in the spotlight. It's all part of growing up, a feat made more challenging because Monica has done it in the public eye. "I've learned that everyone is not concerned with my best interest," she says.
Monica will tell you she has been hurt. A former boyfriend and his "baby-mama drama" inspired the lyrics to her song, "Ring Da Bell." Tabloids continue to falsely report, she says, that she has been pregnant.
"It doesn't bother me because they are saying [I was pregnant]," she says. "But I always felt like if that were the case, it would be such an invasion of privacy on others' behalf, particularly the child. It has happened on four different occasions, four different years apart. I keep wondering when they are going to cut it out. When does it stop?"
Monica says she relies on her mother, Marilyn Best, whom she calls her "best friend," childhood buddies and Whitney Houston to handle life's letdowns. "Whitney has always had issues with rumors," she says. "She started calling me to let me know she was there. She would ask me, `Did they spell your name right?' Then she would say, `As long as they spell your name right, you're cool,'" she laughs.
Family and friends are her center. Her cousin, Melinda Dancil, is her manager. Her aunt, Laura Bonner, and mother manage her finances. She hangs out nearly every day with her 16-year-old brother Montez, and sees her other brothers, Tron and Cypress, when she can. "Everything is done as one," she says.
Monica's recent move to her own place was a step to make room for her ailing grandmother rather than to declare her independence, she says. The singer is still a self-proclaimed "mama's girl," spending more time at her mother's than at her own condominium just six minutes away. In fact, her mother, aunt and cousins all live within a few blocks. "We all go to my mother's house every day," she says, "whether I'm here or not. That's the place where we all catch up."
Her father, M.C. Arnold Jr., also lives nearby. In recent years, she has reconciled with the man whom she says she pushed away when he and her mother split. "I think that tragedy brought us together," she says. "I lost my cousin and that brought everything full circle. Now, I'll go over [to my father's] house and sit and eat with him or he'll come and see me. We'll talk to each other even, few days."
Monica has also grown in oilier ways. She used to worry about her weight. "I always had issues about my size," she says. "Of course, everyone knows I'm from the South. For a while what was really popular and what guys were into was thick and voluptuous women. That's not what I was."
She now appreciates her slender shape, giving some of the credit for her newfound confidence to the support of her family and friends. Monica met one of her best friends, rapper Mia X, five years ago and says their friendship continues to bloom.
"We always do stuff together," she says. "A lot of times we'll hook up in California. She cooks all the things I like--fried chicken, red beans and rice. The only thing I can make that she likes is oxtails. Normally, we get together and either cook or shop. We spend a lot of time together, I go there for her birthday and she comes for mine."
They also help each other through tragedy. When Mia's father died in a car accident this year, Monica comforted her. Mia has helped Monica deal with rumors. The women are so close that Monica will be maid of honor in Mia X's wedding.
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