Sports & Sex >>
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Best Endearingly Uncomfortable Coach-Team Pairing
Knicks and Mike D’Antoni
You may have observed that last year’s Knicks squad was absolutely hideous. Mercifully, that debacle’s primary architect, Isiah Thomas, has been relieved of his head-coaching duties. (Though he remains in the organization and will be paid $18 million this year not to talk to his former... More >>
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Best Salve for Your Soul While Watching D’Antoni’s Knicks
Walt “Clyde” Frazier
Gotta love Walt “Clyde” Frazier, the Knicks’ TV commentator. On the one hand, the mighty Hall of Famer tragically reminds us of the Knicks’ storied history (those championships in ’70 and ’73, say); on the other, Clyde’s presence as color commentator for the Knicks’ games on MSG is often the... More >>
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Best Met
David Wright
In a June game against the Angels, José Reyes came up lame trying to run out a grounder. When recently installed manager Jerry Manuel took his young star out of the game as a precautionary measure, Reyes threw his helmet in disgust before storming off to the Mets’ locker room. Willie Randolph... More >>
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Best Place to Watch Pro Football
Professor Thom’s
If you’re like us, Sunday afternoons in the fall require a serious NFL fix that can only be satisfied by watching several different games at the same time. Problem is, the bar on the corner only has three or four TV sets (with most of them tuned to the home teams), but you don’t want to... More >>
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Best Under-Appreciated Bowling Alley
Harlem Lanes
Harlem Lanes might be going overboard by describing an evening there as “the most unforgettable experience New York’s hottest entertainment destination can offer,” but that’s the kind of swagger we appreciate at a place that mixes bowling with spoken-word poetry. They also have disco bowling,... More >>
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Best 10-Minute Massage
Renew & Relax Spa
Perhaps Renew & Relax Spa’s proximity to the Voice office makes us biased, but a 10-minute rubdown here is better than a three-martini lunch. When you enter, it seems more like a glorified nail salon than a true spa; it’s far from the chic pampering available at places like Bliss or the nearby... More >>
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Best Yankee
Mike "Moose" Mussina
At the end of the 2007 season, Mike “Moose” Mussina was so bad that the Yanks yanked him from the starting rotation in the middle of a pennant run. Giving up more than five runs a game, those weren’t Moooooooose!’s that greeted Mussina for most of the season. But in ’08, the same guy that the... More >>
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Best Gym Workout Without Having To Be Under the Scrutiny of Trainers, Buff Guys, or Yogis
Dance Dance Party Party
Some people hate clubbing, and it’s not only because New York City clubs are kind of B&T.; Some people hate it because of sweat. They’re embarrassed about the pit stains that form on their tight poly-blend club clothes after only a few minutes on the dance floor—gyrating in a steamy club while... More >>
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Best New York Football Giant
Tom Coughlin
With all-time NFL sack leader Michael Strahan stepping down, the title of best football Giant should probably go to one of his defensive mates, like media-hating, horn-blowing Antonio Pierce or on-the-verge-of-being-a-star Justin Tuck. Given that he finally started playing efficiently and mixed... More >>
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Best Brooklyn Bike Gurus
Roy's Sheepshead Cycle, Ilya Nikhamin, and Allen Trepel
Roy’s Sheepshead Cycle opened in Brooklyn in 1931 on 86th Street. Now, two moves and 77 years later, the shop has developed a reputation for its knowledgeable (if occasionally gruff) staff. The head bike guru, owner Allen Trepel, is a master at bike fittings and correcting customers’ cycling... More >>
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Best New York Knickerbocker
Jamal Crawford
It would have been nice to hand this award to, say, University of Memphis guard Derek Rose or Kansas frosh sensation Michael Beasley, the No. 1 and No. 2 picks in the draft, for the next 10 or so years. But the Knicks—who haven’t picked a high-impact first-rounder since Rod Strickland 20 years... More >>
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Best Jet
Brett Favre
Brett who? The best Jet football player is almost sure not to rush for a yard, throw a pass, score a touchdown, or maybe even not make a tackle. In the off-season, the Jets netted one of the prize free agents in six-foot-five, 307-pound guard Alan Faneca. The seven-time All-Pro came at a price... More >>
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Best Flowers in Manhattan You Can’t Buy
Fort Tryon Park
If you’ve been to the Cloisters, the Met’s reconstructed monastery, you probably couldn’t resist a walk through the gardens of Fort Tryon Park. The 67-acre public park has thousands of blossoms bursting into Technicolor glory each spring—sunflowers, snapdragons, tulips, roses, irises,... More >>
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Best Place to Lose Your Money to Elderly Gentlemen
William F. Moore Park
Sure, you think, you’re young, smart, and fit—surely you can best a geriatric in any athletic challenge! Brother, you are about to enter a world of hurt. The seniors who populate the bocce courts in the William F. Moore Park in Corona, Queens, will take your money and your dignity. Happily,... More >>
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Best Strip Club for Living Like Rappers (1 Comment)
Sin City
For a taste of the rap-music-video life, with naked women, money falling from the sky like rain, and bottles of champagne popping, hit up Sin City in the Bronx. On any weeknight, you may run into hip-hoppers Papoose, Kay Slay, Funkmaster Flex, Ed Lover, members of Dip Set, and others. You won’t... More >>
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Best Black Brooklyn Gay Stroll (2 Comments)
Atlantic Avenue between Waverly Street and Washington Avenue
On a tiny strip on Atlantic Avenue between Waverly Street and Washington Avenue, in what is soon to be part of the massive Atlantic Yards takeover, men of color stroll looking for love—or just instant gratification. Depending on the time of day, you can cruise professionals, service workers,... More >>
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Best Fishing Hole (in the Wall)
Red Hook Bait and Tackle
We’re sure there are plenty of nice spots around the city to while away the hours with a fishing rod in hand. But if it’s the elusive Guinness fish you’re after, look no further than Red Hook Bait and Tackle, one of the best dive bars in Brooklyn. Formerly a bait-and-tackle shop, this dimly... More >>
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Best New York Ranger
Henrik Lundqvist
The best player on the Blue Shirts last year and the year before wasn’t Jaromír Jágr, who will play in Russia this year, or Sean Avery, who will line up for the Dallas Stars, but All-Star goalie Henrik Lundqvist. The Swede net minder led the league last year with 10 shutouts (third-best ever in... More >>
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Best Place To Get Hit In the Head With A Soccer Ball
McCarren Park
From a distance, the McCarren Park track may look harmless, but during the morning hours of 7 to 11, the track transforms into an obstacle course of an unusual sort. In the center of the track, players preparing for games later in the day practice by kicking roughly a gazillion soccer balls... More >>
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Best Place to Dork Out
New York Table Tennis Federation
Unlike certain hipster bars that offer a ping-pong table with their beer, there’s absolutely nothing cool about spending a Friday night smacking a featherweight ball around at the New York Table Tennis Federation. However, you may be shocked to discover that if you tell your friends you’re... More >>
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Best Place To Get Some Space
Brooklyn Eastern District Terminal Site Reclamation
Williamsburg: land of (attractive) human gridlock. From the L train to Bedford Avenue and then to your three-bedroom, five-roommate apartment (not counting your unofficial official houseguest), your body never has any personal space. Instead of opting for a day trip to Central Park or the... More >>
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Best Place to Walk on Glass
Coney Island
Coney Island has long been NYC’s go-to spot for sideshows and freak shows—sword swallowers, fire eaters, people straightening out their deviated septums by pounding nails up their nostrils. Such exotic thrills, though, need not be limited to the tattooed performers—indeed, anyone can practice... More >>
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Best Park With a View
Astoria Park
The most common rationalization of an outer-borough dweller is: “If I lived in Manhattan, I wouldn’t get this amazing view!” And so we move farther and farther east and north, stretch out on rooftops and terraces that we wouldn’t be able to afford in Manhattan, and gaze upon the landmarks of an... More >>
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Best Bathroom for Getting It On in Private (1 Comment)
Hotel on Rivington
You and your partner are shopping at Babeland for some new love trinkets and can’t wait to get home to try them out. Hey, we’ve all been there. Luckily, the Hotel on Rivington is just a block away. What’s that? Don’t have $500 to spare for a room? Relax—just have a drink at the ground-floor... More >>
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Best Feel-Good Ride
Horseback riding
Horseback riding isn’t only a great workout; it’s also an opportunity to enjoy a little intimate time with nature—and yourself. Women in particular have been known to experience great joys during long, intense rides. Finding the right saddle, like finding the right partner, can be a challenge,... More >>
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Best Odds for Gay Sex in a Gym Shower (2 Comments)
David Barton Gym
Co-ed gym showers haven’t exactly taken off yet, so strict heteros can ignore this one. But for anyone else who has ever fantasized about a shower tryst with a buff beefcake of the same sex, David Barton Gym has got a track record for best odds. In fact, lithe Chelsea boys not only bathe there;... More >>
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Best Spectator Sport (1 Comment)
Women’s Turkish Oil Wrestling
It’s not exactly dry humping if you’re lubed up with oil, but close enough. The event is Women’s Turkish Oil Wrestling, and the concept is self-explanatory: Strip down, oil up, get in the rink, wrap your thighs around another girl’s face, and scream. Not much different from any other night in... More >>
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Best Gym Window Candy
New York Health & Racquet Club
New York gyms can be annoyingly exhibitionist, especially for the chubbies who actually need to go. Street-level, floor-to-ceiling windows don’t make it any easier for exercise-phobes to get up the motivation to work out. But that’s not who New York gyms are for anyway. In particular, New York... More >>
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