Status Update

( Average time to read: 1:21 minutes | 327 words )

Dum dum dum! It’s time for the dreaded UM.Net Status Update! The last time I wrote a post like this was about a year ago, and I was in a stage of my growth called the asshole stage. This post is a little similar, but don’t worry, this time I’m not an @$$ (I hope :D ).

As mentioned in that older post, UM.Net is mostly a personal record of all the things I have learnt, and use on myself in my little exploration. This means that these articles and how they come across are very closely influenced by my progress and where I am inside.

Two things have been happening. For the past couple of years I’ve been living quite a contemplative lifestyle. For the past few months, this inward stroke (as the awesome Davidya calls it) has been ending, and now there’s a huge urge to move out into the world again. It’s been amazing. As within, so without, as the old saying goes, and I’m really seeing how true that is.

The second thing might be related – spiritual fatigue. I have been fighting it and trying to tough it out for weeks, not really knowing what it was. Recently I realised it wasn’t mental or physical fatigue, as I’ve been getting a lot of sleep and fresh air and it hasn’t worked. I think I just need a break from all this inner work.

I’ve actually written many posts but stopped myself from posting them. While hopefully the information in there is useful, the fatigue in them can be quite obvious. So, rather than put out some half-hearted posts, I’ve decided to go into guest post mode for a couple of weeks, and slowly refine these posts.

There are some very nice posts by some top quality writers in the personal development / spirituality world lined up. They’re a treat to read, I promise!

In the meantime, maybe there are some hidden gems in the archives?

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  1. Good to hear, Albert!

    I’ve been going through fatigue – literally – for 2 years now. Realizing how much I’ve been trying. Trying to be good, trying to be the person I wanted to be. Thinking too much.

    It’s good to just let go, including letting go of writing. Letting go of helping others.

    It’s a continual lesson that we help others most often simply by being. By our presence, and not just the physical in-the-room presence. Even if we aren’t that present. It helps to let go.

  2. :)omi says:

    Good to hear you, Albert!

    Take as much time as you need, after all you know best what is good for you!

    Hope your experiment went ok! Had to give up after having problems with the formular two times in a row…

  3. Albert says:

    @ Matthew: It’s really good to hear your perspectives. Thanks for the comment.

    @ :) omi: Thanks! Hah, the experiment was OK, from what I heard. We don’t have the final results back, but the website did make us lose quite a few. Thanks for helping out ;)

  4. Ariel Bravy says:

    Hey Albert, I’ve been going through a very similar process with respect to fatigue and not putting out material. It’s been a very going within experience, as if I have no extra energy to give to the world.

    This article may help put this all into perspective, giving you a larger context to fit it in. It seems that many of us lightworkers are going through the same sort of energetic transition right now.


  5. Davidya says:

    The monk becomes urban, fulfilling his nom de plume. ;-)

    The outward stroke, bringing that inner depth into the world can be the most fun.

    Fatigue can often be a sign of resistance. Something is pushing, as Matthew described.

    To the tune of “Let it Snow”:
    Let it go, let it go, let it go… ;-)

    (and thanks for the link)

  6. Albert says:

    @ Ariel: Thanks mate, I’ll check out the link now. I’ve never been called a lightworker before, it’s kinda cool :D

    @ Davidya: Hey mate ;) You’re right it certainly is the most fun, and this post removes the guilt of “OMG my blog hasn’t been updated for so long”. Haha!

  7. Dave says:

    About twenty years ago I moved to the west in the US, to the mountains, largely to allow myself time to be introspective. I was just a few years into my first real attempt to explore my spiritual life. Having grown up in the city I felt moving to where I did go was a way to really step away from a lot of what I felt was unnecessary distraction. It did turn out to be a really great time in my life.

    I had read somewhere that there could be a time in our lives when we could and perhaps needed to be very introspective but that this was not a good way to try to always live. Something to the affect of we need to live our life, not remove ourselves from living. I did not retreat from everything for the five years that followed but I did experience living much differently. My path then took me away from there, as if the universe was telling my my time for my deep introspection was done.

    It was a challenge to transition back to living in the middle of the seeming distractions I had left behind. Confusion abounded, tension seemed to be constantly building, I couldn’t walk in the mountains every day and many other “problems” seemed to vex me for awhile.

    Yet part of the point of the introspection was to gain some inner peace. The lessons I learned way back when still today allows me to live my life better in the middle of so much that now goes on all around me.

    Even so, the transition from having the luxury of being able to focus on what I want to one where there are many other things I had to otherwise focus on was rough.

  8. Evan says:

    Enjoy the break. Come back refreshed – looking forward to the guests and your posts when they’re ready.

  9. Hey Albert:)

    Sorry to hear you’re a little worn out, but good choice to rather not post half hearted articles.

    Take your time to relax, the inspiration will come.

    Maybe take up a new hobby, martial arts, an instrument or a new language. That always helps in getting a new perspective on life :)

    Have a rockin’ day! :)

  10. Albert says:

    @ Dave: Thank you for sharing. That was great to read.

    @ Evan: Thanks mate :D

    @ Diggy: Hey buddy, cheers! Have an awesome day yourself!

  11. Lyne says:

    Enjoy your rest! Surround yourself with nature.. which will surely help to restore YOU ;-)
    Remember in order to make a difference in peoples lives… you yourself must be whole ;-)

    Take Care of You!
    Lyne ;-)

  12. Hi Albert,

    That is awesome that you realized what was happening within. I have found that with spirituality, more is accomplished when you let it go. So like Davidya said: let it go, let it go.

    You will be surprised that all the pieces that you were trying so hard to fall into place, will come together naturally.

    So enjoy your time off and you can count on me to read whatever you end up posting! :)

  13. Albert,

    It is probably for the best to take a break from this inner work, as you’ve called it. You may find this time away to be more valuable than the actual work you’ve done. You’ll be surprised at what you might find, beyond the work.

    And you already know a good way to blow off steam, if that is what you need to do. (Reloading!!) I’ll help if I can.

    Be good, and talk to you soon.


  14. Evita says:

    Albert it is always great to hear where a person is on a personal level in terms of their own growth and evolution. It is authentic.

    Most importantly I think we need to allow ourselves to be and flow with what we feel instead of resist it. So take the inward path, or take the outward path. In the end what matters is that there is a joy and happiness within you as you go through each day.

    Sending lots of love and light your way!

  15. Spiritual Fatigue? You mean to say that inner work has made you tired. If yes, then what would a break from this? Going footloose in another physical, emotional & mental world? what are your plans to overcome this fatigue?

  16. Hey, Albert! You know, I’ve been on a spiritual sabbatical of sorts myself lately… and taking a break from posting on my blog. People might start talking if we’re both on break at the same time.

    I’ve had a couple of weeks off now and it was the BEST thing I could’ve done. I’ll be getting back to blogging soon, but not in the same way. I now know what parts I love about blogging, and want to focus more on those.

    Everyone needs a little time sometimes… enjoy your break!

  17. Davidya says:

    Hi UrbanM

    A post over on Takuin’s, our conversation and another lead me to post an article on Concept Fatigue and the opening it may provide. While not directly related to yours, sometimes fatigue is a sign of resistance to a shift underway. May be insightful…

    Assuming I can tear you away from life ;-)

  18. Evelyn Lim says:

    Hey Albert, I think what you are going through is pretty normal. It is also true that as you go through a period of cleansing with inner work, you won’t feel like being in too much contact with the world. The thing is to simply take a break and rest!

    Take care,

  19. Albert says:

    @ Lyne: Thanks! I’ve been getting lots of fresh air and its amazing.

    @ Nadia: You’re awesome! :D

    @ Takuin: Did you get my email? Let’s go cleanse the infection soon.

  20. Albert says:

    @ Evita: I appreciate all the love!

    @ Kolammal: I’m not sure what you are asking? I’m just going to take a break and smell the roses. ;)

    @ Lisis: Haha! Cyber cheating?

  21. Albert says:

    @ Davidya: I’ll go check it out now – I’m not doing much, stuffing my face with pizza and shooting zombies. Hah!

    @ Evelyn: Thank you so much for your support. :D

  22. Uzma says:

    Hey Albert
    Am sure this new phase will be a great one. Full of more action packed learning!!
    Go with the flow and have fun!!

  23. Kaushik says:

    Same with me, in the last year, there has been isolation, apathy, detachment, confusion, recidivism to addictions…it feels like I’m coming out of it, but if I am, it’s a slow coming-out. But it’s also a time of amazing discovery.

    Writing helps.

    Thanks for sharing!

  24. Albert says:

    Uzma and Kaushik, thanks a lot. WIll keep you guys updated :)

  25. Erin says:

    You must empty your cup to have it refilled again.

  26. Davidya says:

    Yeah, sometimes “progress” can seem like regression. I remind myself what it is that’s regressing.

    Stepping back into origins, peeling back into the “child”, dropping into the core of the dream… it’s kind of a regression of the expression.

    It’s beginning is also it’s end.

  27. Liara Covert says:

    Every effort you make is meaningful and appreciated with unconditional, unwavering love.

  28. Albert says:

    Thanks Liara and Erin!

  29. The more a break feels like a real break from spiritual work the more it probably isn’t.

    I don’t know… it has a nice ring, kind of a Zen sound – in any case, it’s been like that for me sometimes.

  30. Kathy says:

    Nice to find you here Urban Monk…we have a few things in common being that I married one. I think your blog is wonderful and I think that spiritual fatigue seems normal to me. Sometimes we have to let go or step back from spiritual endeavors or even blog posts and step back into life as it is. There’s an ebb and flow of all things in life. The tricky part is moving with this ebb and flow…letting go and letting life guide you. Peace to you, Kathy

  31. hey there … haven’t connected for a while.

    i know that feeling! am wondering, rather than calling it spiritual fatigue, could we just call it an ebb and flow?

  32. Albert says:

    @ Kathy: Thank you for your support. The past few days have been really cool, since there isn’t a background guilt about taking a break, it really lets me relax and enjoy my time off. (Until the retreat I took over the weekend, described below. :D )

    @ Isabella: Yea long time no see! How have you been? I went for a meditation retreat over the weekend, and now I’m wondering if this fatigue might be resistance to some things that I didn’t want to look at.

  33. Albert says:

    @ Paul: Whoops for some reason I cropped out my reply to you in the comment above. Sorry. But thank you for your support. You’re right, as I was saying to Isabella, after my retreat, I think this fatigue might be me not wanting to look at certain things inside myself.

  34. A(muse)d says:

    I’m very excited to have come across this blog. I was looking up information on Osho in relation to his thoughts on fears and growth when I came across this blog. It’s wonderful to read everyones insightful observations and experiences while they wander along their paths.
    Sometimes I ask myself as I’m getting caught up in all of these thoughts/reflections and spiritual questions…if maybe, just maybe I’m taking it all too seriously? Where is the much needed humor?

    Like a breath of fresh air.

  35. Albert says:

    Hi Amused :) Hehe, we all get caught up in this and take it all too seriously sometimes.

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