Farm Show is a world of wonders

I submit to you that there is only one place in Pennsylvania where you could spend a day watching teenagers demonstrate how to skin and stuff a raccoon, learn how to cook pork Madeira and Brussels sprouts, see a magician whose face is grotesquely distorted by a leaf blower and try your hand at judging prize hogs — and then gorge yourself on food that honors the state's potato, livestock, dairy, honey and mushroom producers.

It's the same place where you can gawk at half a ton of butter sculpted into children hanging from monkey bars, ride a carousel, get a massage, watch bees in a hive, pick up free recipe books, buy cowboy boots, shop for just about anything and educate yourself about pesticides by playing miniature golf.

The Pennsylvania Farm Show, of course.

I've been on a mission for years to convince non-farm people in the Lehigh Valley to make the trek to Harrisburg for a day at the Farm Show, which concludes Saturday. It's so big, so broad, so eclectic that I can almost guarantee there's something you'll like, whatever your age or interests. In fact, I always find myself flummoxed when I try to convey the wonder of the whole thing.

Perhaps it's a mistake for me to focus on the Future Farmers of America kids who were conducting the home taxidermy demonstration Monday morning, but I couldn't have been more delighted to stumble across them, because they were the perfect example of the way serendipity is served when you start wandering around the mazelike farm show complex. There were three girls and a boy, confidently lecturing and demonstrating in tag team style.

As I arrived, one of the girls, standing behind a rather quizzical-looking stuffed raccoon, was explaining the skinning process. It got more horrifying as they went along, talking matter-of-factly about breaking off the varmint's ankles, scraping off the flesh and tissue that might rot, using Borax for drying and the challenges of realistic eyes, lips and particularly the jaw, since the teeth aren't in there to maintain the right configuration.

"We were going to skin a fresh hide," one the girls noted dryly, "but somebody forgot it at the school." They all pointed at the guy in the group, throwing him under the bus while he grinned sheepishly.