Are young people addicted to feeling good about themselves?
Given the choice, young bright college students said they’d rather get a boost to their ego — like a compliment or a good grade on a paper — than eat a favorite food or engage in sex, a new paper suggests.
The researchers question whether the so-called “me generation” of baby boomers has spawned a nation of self-absorbed young people hooked on their own self-esteem. The inflated sense of self in students, they argue, could lead to trouble in the work world and in personal relationships.
Recent books like “The Narcissism Epidemic,” by Jean M. Twenge and W. Keith Campbell, have described a trend toward increasing levels of self-esteem and narcissism in young people. The idea is not without controversy, as other psychologists have questioned whether young people today are any more self-absorbed than earlier generations. Some believe that the maturation process is simply more protracted, and the delays are misinterpreted as selfishness.
The results of the new paper suggest young people have a compulsion to feel good about themselves that overwhelms and precedes other desires.
“I was shocked,” said the lead researcher, Brad Bushman, professor of communication and psychology at the Ohio State University. “Everybody likes compliments, but more than engaging in your favorite sexual activity? More than receiving a paycheck? I was surprised it was such a powerful thing that it trumped everything else.”
But Carol Landau, a clinical professor of psychiatry and medicine at Alpert Medical School at Brown University, pointed out that sex and alcohol are readily available on many college campuses and within students’ reach. Their accessibility could explain why students are more motivated to get good grades and positive feedback, which may be harder to come by. “The other rewards are somewhat within their control,” Dr. Landau said. “The self-esteem factors are not.”
She also said she was hesitant to generalize from studies in which college students filled out questionnaires. Self-reporting can often be unreliable.
The current paper, published in The Journal of Personality, described two separate studies.
One included 130 University of Michigan students who were asked to think about their favorite food, their favorite sexual activity and their favorite self-esteem-building experience, like getting a compliment or a good grade on a paper. Participants were asked both about how much they “liked” the activity and how much they “wanted” it on a scale of 1, for “not at all,” to 5, for “extremely.”
An analysis of the results showed that the participants generally “liked” various activities, including those that boosted self-esteem, more than they “wanted” them. But compared to other activities, the difference between enjoying and wanting the activity was lowest for activities that boosted self-esteem.
The distinction is important, Dr. Bushman said, because research on addiction suggests that one indication of habituation is that people tend to want or need something more than they actually like or enjoy it.
The participants were also asked to do a timed test of intellectual ability, and then were told they had the option of waiting for an extra 10 minutes to have the test re-evaluated using a different algorithm that produces higher scores. This essentially gave them an opportunity to get a self-esteem boost right there in the lab. Not surprisingly, students who highly valued self-esteem were more likely to be willing to stick around to get the new scores.
In the second study, a group of 152 University of Michigan students were asked about their favorite activity, but were given an expanded list to choose from that included receiving a paycheck, seeing a best friend and drinking alcohol, in addition to eating a favorite food, engaging in a favorite sexual activity and having a self-esteem-building experience. Again, self-esteem trumped all other rewards. This study also ascertained how recently participants had experienced or engaged in their favorite activities. It appeared to make no difference how long it had been since they had last received the rewards, the researchers said.
Some researchers fault the emphasis placed on building and promoting self-esteem in children among certain schools of parenting and education.
“The idea has been that if we build their self-esteem, then they’ll do better in school and in relationships,” said Dr. Twenge, the “Narcissism Epidemic” author. “Well, that puts the cart before the horse. When you break down the research you see that kids who behave well and get high grades develop high self-esteem — not the other way around.”
Healthy living doesn’t happen at the doctor’s office. The road to better health is paved with the small decisions we make every day. It’s about the choices we make when we buy groceries, drive our cars and hang out with our kids. Join columnist Tara Parker-Pope as she sifts through medical research and expert opinions for practical advice to help readers take control of their health and live well every day. 
From 1 to 25 of 99 Comments
The best kind of self esteem you can have is in the sure knowledge that you have done a thing correctly or well, not merely in being told that you have done so. I am also most gratified when I am sincerely told, or can see for myself, that my actions have really made someone else’s life better, or even just lightened their load for a little bit with a joke or a warm gesture.
— Martha GoffPerhaps this younger generation does need a minor boost of self-esteem, perhaps socially and economically this is a difficult time to be a twenty-somthing. After all, unemployment rates have surged for this demographic. Likely, this makes a swath of them feel worth-less and deceived, having spent years pursuing higher education in the hopes of bettering themselves only to be faced with a bottomed out job market. With regard to the recent NYT article about law schools, this generation is currently facing the depressing results of having accepted false promises handed down to them by people who should have know better. Sad.
— jhThis is simply ridiculous.
EVERYONE cares about these boosts to their self-esteem, not just young adults. And it’s not necessarily a sign of narcissism. A boost to one’s esteem, such as praise from a respected colleague, could well mean anything but narcissism – it reinforces that we are in fact making a contribution to society, doing important work, showing our ability to care for and work with others, etc.
The conclusions drawn from this study – which didn’t interview anyone besides college students – are so farfetched as to make one wonder whether they are a joke.
— ShanaThese results are not surprising, actually. After all, people eat pizza (and a whole host of other foods marketed to induce feelings of pleasure) and engage in sexual activity in order to feel good! In American culture we are constantly looking for ways to feel better about ourselves, whether that’s through food, reality TV, sex, etc. Not saying these methods work…but it does seem to be the intention.
— AmeliaCouldn’t the results be explained in large part by the fact that the students didn’t want to look like alcoholic sex maniacs in front of their teacher? Even if the tests were anonymous, the students might not have trusted that anonymity, or might have been concerned about how their peer group would be judged.
— JonathanIsn’t engaging in sex a boost for your ego (at least for males)?
I would much rather eat pizza than hvae somebody pay me a compliment. Talk is cheap, pizza, unfortunately, comes with weight.
— KenGThis study is great – it shows that young people value accomplishments and being productive, rather than (often) self-destructive behavior like drinking or having sex. I can’t believe the researchers would prefer young people to waste their energy on fleeting, fattening, and short-term interests.
Sorry, baby boomers, this generation is not about “sex, drugs, and rock-and-roll!”
— JackBKBig business must be loving this. These kids are the perfect future employees for the minimum wage workforce that we are devolving to. What boss wouldn’t want employees who are happy with a compliment instead of a tangible monetary reward? Pay ‘em minimum wage, pat ‘em on the back once in a while or hand out some cheezy trinket, and everyone’s happy. LIke Napoleon said: “A soldier will fight long and hard for a bit of colored ribbon.:
— bobSo now we are worried that college students prefer getting good grades to unhealthy binge eating and drinking, or having sex outside the context of a relationship? The procedure of these studies (and even the very title of “The Narcissism Epidemic”) seems calculated to produce the desired results. As an educator of high school and college students for a decade now, I can tell you (with my anecdotal evidence) that worried parents are a fantastic market for buying books, especially ones that suggest that they need to worry about all the good things they’ve done (like give their children lives in which they like themselves and succeed). Worrying about too-high self-esteem is ridiculous – first, most teenagers I’ve met are terrified that they aren’t good enough. Second, when you meet a kid whose parents raised him or her “the old-fashioned way”, with a belt and verbal abuse, the perspective changes a bit. Third, the idea that feeling good about oneself is an addiction evacuates the word “addiction” of its meaning.
— Matt“They had the option of waiting for an extra 10 minutes to have the test re-evaluated using a different algorithm that produces higher scores.”
That’s just absurd. So these people basically wanted a merit badge about their intelligence that clearly had no correlation to actual intelligence — if the algorithm would produce higher scores for them, it would do so for everyone else as well, making any “increase” meaningless since intelligence is a relative measure — but were too unintelligent to realize this.
It just proves that people want what they don’t have. The truly intelligent women I’ve dated wanted to be complimented on their looks, the good looking ones wanted me to think they were smart, etc.
The study conclusion should be that insecure people want a boost to their self-esteem more than they want sex. The pizza isn’t worth discussing.
http://www.boldizar.com
— Boldizarthere should be no choice.
— ORIF401Some fun sex followed by a slice of pizza can certainly lead to enhanced self esteem. Life is meant to be enjoyed.
The generation that prefers an avatar on facebook telling them how great they were in bed, than actually having been there in the first place?
— AviAs a young adult who probably fits into the “self-esteem seeking” category, it seems to me that it’s a big leap to state that an individual is narcissistic for choosing a “good grade” over pizza or sex. Look at it from a health (or personal wellness) perspective- a good grade can only benefit you- it can contribute to a higher GPA, which in turn could lead to a better post-college internship, recommendation, or job. With the job field as it is, every bit helps.
Pizza, on the other hand, only satisfies an immediate need- and poorly, at that- with all of the saturated fats and preservatives that one imagines in a Domino’s pizza. As for sex? Meh. Once again, meeting an immediate need, at the expense of long-term risks. It’s great and all that, but it carries less long-term positive effects than a good grade. And anyone weighing the three options can see that a good grade is A LOT more scarce than pizza or sex for the majority of this generation.
If the goal of the research was to determine if the “need” individuals have for public acknowledgement, perhaps the focus should have been on different forms of acknowledgement, and the scope of public awareness. For example, getting an “A” in a class versus being given an award publicly.
— CSJust wait until they hit forty. It will be “sex” again, at least if they are male. All I can advise them is work hard and save and hide their money. Covert time spent with good-looking twenty-something-year-old women will become much more expensive when you are older and married — believe me. It’s available and plentiful — just expensive.
— nonameI didn’t read the full text to the study, but the write-up here isn’t supported by the outcomes. The study produced a set of statistics as a result, but did not delve into the “why” at all (from what I see written here). This looks like a lot of presumption on the part of the researchers to me.
An alternate explanation is that people place a higher premium on recognition of their abilities and their work product than on disposable rewards which they did not earn.
— Kate“that the maturation process is simply more protracted”
I think the above idea is most interesting. If it’s correct why is that the case ?
My guess is they were given everything and
didn’t have to face the real world. That does not encourage growth in the backbone.
I’m definately a P and P guy.
— Al LouardWait, what’s the problem here? That students reportedly want good grades more than pizza?
— RedReal self-esteem is something that is earned by one’s own actions.
What we speak of here is “self-esteem” created by a third party telling someone how great they are for doing essentially nothing.
A good everyday example of such “self-esteem” is the awarding of trophies to every kid who pays his/her registration fee for soccer.
— jackEveryone seems to be shocked that these college students would choose an accomplishment (getting s good grade) over sex. But even in this day and age not all college students are sexually active (and certainly many are not experienced enough to be able to choose a “favorite sexual activity” from a wealth of life experience). In addition, this age group is very image-conscious, so choosing to eat a favorite food, like pizza, might not be something they would openly admit to wanting more than accomplishment either.
No one is talking about the compulsion that many studuents may have had to give the “right” answer, which is the one they think the investigators want to hear. What student would admit to wanting to eat a slice of pizza instead of getting a A on a big test?
— Liz in SeattleSo, you say students prefer to receive measures of success/respect/admiration over food and sex, and you’re saying this is a bad thing? Please explain.
— MichaelCould the research be saying young people have LOW self-esteem instead of a narcissism?
When I was in college a few years ago, I knew beautiful girls that were bulimic, jocks ashamed of their intelligence, and fraternity members that felt lonely and isolated.
This age of media and advertising bombards us every day with images of what we are not and can never be. My generation is normal. We’re not overly into our egos. We just don’t want to feel alone and irrelevant.
— sundiata101People want what they don’t have.
So if they want self-esteem so badly, they probably don’t have much in the first place.
— Miss UnderstoodWell when someone wants to have sex with me that boosts my self-esteem, so I’d have gone for the sex and killed two birds with one stone.
— EdIf we think simplistically, then the primary goals of any individual are to survive (get food) and reproduce (get sex). If these are presently readily available to someone, then I expect they’d prioritize ensuring continued access in the future. This is achieved through gaining social status, and it seems these students are preferring outcomes that indicate elevated status, which fits with this. From this perspective I don’t see why anyone would choose differently, unless they weren’t having their basic needs of food and sex met.
In terms of what’s good for society, it seems to me you get the best behavior from people when they are motivated by seeking social status, as opposed to seeking material gains (food, or paycheck) or sex. This is why we trust nuns and doctors and scientists and not so much businesspeople and bankers. So, it seems to me a good thing that students think this way.
So why describe this in terms of “ego-centrism” and paint it as bad? It seems to me this is just youth-bashing. Why not compare to results among adults? Why not divide adults into categories measuring success, and see if there are any trends among the stated preferences? Because I’d wager the most happy, most successful adults, are going to choose more in accordance with these kids than others.
— MichaelAdd me to Shana and the others.
It’s a PROBLEM that college students would rather hear “job well done!” than eat a pizza or get laid?
Wow, this will be a terrible problem when it’s time for them to make a positive contribution to society! I mean, they’ll end up doing things like building bridges instead of going to fancy restaurants and strip joints! What a waste of human potential!
— Janet