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CO GOPer Skids Trying To Explain UN Bicycle Plot Comments


Colorado Republican gubernatorial candidate Dan Maes

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Colorado Republican gubernatorial candidate Dan Maes raised eyebrows and kickstands last week, when he suggested that a Denver bicycling program supported by presumptive Democratic nominee and Denver Mayor John Hickenlooper was some kind of UN plot. Today on MSNBC, Maes was forced to try to explain. But instead of backpedaling, Maes just rode right on ahead.

"The bike program in and of itself is fine," Maes said. "What I'm concerned about is what's behind it all."

"We're trying to differentiate myself from the Mayor," he said. Maes argued that if he wins the primary, "people are going to say, 'What's the differences?' because we're both business people. When the mayor signs on to a program that's sponsored by the United Nations, that should bring concern to people as to how that program may or may not be compatible with our state constitution."

The primary is Tuesday, and the latest PPP poll of the race showed Maes trailing Scott McInnis by one point, 41%-40%.

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August 9, 2010 6:51 PM   

Get in line, buddy. You've got some ground to make up if you're going to play in the big leagues with Sarah Palin, Sharron Angle, Rand Paul, and all the rest of the know-nothing, do-nothing GOPers.

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August 9, 2010 7:11 PM   

The UN is also in favor of preventing deaths from unclean water in developing countries.

I guess that means Maes believes Hickenlooper should be against preventing such deaths.

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August 9, 2010 8:46 PM    in reply to FreeRider

This guy is an ideological descendent of those bozos who've been putting up billboards saying "US out of the UN" since the '50s

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August 9, 2010 7:12 PM   

But instead of backpedaling, Maes just road right on ahead.

Ah, yes, another instance of the spell checker as editor. Gee, don't you mean "rowed?" ;)

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August 9, 2010 7:37 PM    in reply to Early Out

No, it should be 'rode'.

He rowed the boat.

He rode the horse.

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August 9, 2010 7:49 PM    in reply to dsavio

How about Rhode? Or rolled? :)

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August 10, 2010 9:52 AM    in reply to BillSoo

Rhode?

Clearly that's code for "hope," as depicted in the state flag of RI and as used by that commie pinko alien Muslim occupying our White House.

Why do you hate America?

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August 10, 2010 11:53 AM    in reply to JBL1955

The "RI" in Len_RI stands for Rhode Island and our motto "Hope" was adopted in 1644. It was chosen specifically for the purpose of providing a platform for an illegal Kenyan to run for president some 300+ years later, knowing that we'd be a blue state by then.

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August 10, 2010 1:59 PM    in reply to Len_RI

Exactly!

Hawaii thinks it's so smart, but RI had it scoped out centuries before.

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August 9, 2010 8:18 PM    in reply to dsavio

The Internet is going to be the death of humor, I swear.

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August 9, 2010 8:26 PM    in reply to Early Out

Sum people just don't get it ...

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August 9, 2010 11:35 PM    in reply to cawleybo

Awl of us get it; wee just didn't think it was that fungi.

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August 10, 2010 1:38 AM    in reply to Early Out

Yep. Too many of us who can spell and to some extent type are going to die laughing at those who can't. As we go, so goes humor.

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August 10, 2010 1:33 PM    in reply to dsavio

Though I prefer 'rowed' - since it would have been a great mixed metaphor - pedaling backwards vs. rowing forward. As someone once said, it has 'all of the earmarks of an eyesore.'

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August 10, 2010 7:18 PM    in reply to dsavio

Beware the inept "correction". I was guilty of it once and have checked and double-checked any of the other usually snide corrections I have made. And spellcheck IS loaded with pitfalls for the unwary.

p.s. This guy sounds as if he's been living in a vacuum for 60 years. How about that Stalin guy?

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August 9, 2010 7:43 PM    in reply to Early Out

lol

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August 10, 2010 7:20 PM    in reply to Early Out

Only if you're in a boat.

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August 9, 2010 7:15 PM   

"The bike program in and of itself is fine," Maes said. "What I'm concerned about is what's behind it all."

That's nothing Dan - has anyone told you what the queers are doing TO THE SOIL?!

But seriously - is being mentally ill now a requirement to run on the Republican ticket?

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August 9, 2010 7:45 PM    in reply to Matt Jones

My God- thanks for the link...I had no IDEA this was happening.

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August 9, 2010 8:28 PM    in reply to Matt Jones

Indeed. Look at the soil around any U.S. city with a large, underground homosexual population.

Des Moines, Iowa: perfect example. Look at the soil around Des Moines. You can't build on it. You can't grow anything on it.

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August 9, 2010 8:36 PM    in reply to Davran

Sadly, the song doesn't even manage to be quite as out-there as some of the *real* RW loons it's parodying...

But in the Dead Milkmens' defense, even the Birchers in the 80's would think todays teabaggers are crazy. :)

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August 10, 2010 11:19 AM    in reply to Matt Jones

The Milkmen did a great job of capturing the free-association thought process of right-wing loons. Fortunately, though, the Milkmen's crazy guy only had pamphlets from Pueblo, Colorado to read, and only Stuart to talk to.

Today's crazies have a whole community of crazy to live in. Each one can pile his/her loony ideas on top of everyone else's loony ideas, and in no time they've produced a whole Mountain of Crazy.

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August 9, 2010 7:16 PM   

Perhaps all of you people should research ICLEI. It's real. It has a website - iclei.org. Those countering it also have a website stopiclei.org.

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August 9, 2010 7:21 PM    in reply to American Mom

Crackerjack website the tinfoil hat brigade's got there; they haven't even bothered to post *anything* explaining who they are or what they stand for. Care to enlighten us on the UN's TOP SEKRIT PLAN to turn us all into atheists living in "compact cities"?

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AJM

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August 9, 2010 9:16 PM    in reply to American Mom

You have to realize that the whole thing started with Eisenhower -- he insisted on building the Interstate even though HE KNEW that the pinko communists of Russia were also building roads. It's been downhill ever since.

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August 10, 2010 1:59 AM    in reply to AJM

Actually that was Eisenhower as a Republican copying the Nazis' and Hitler's autobahns. Since he tried in the early 20's to take an Army division from the east coast to the Pacific, Ike was desperate to find any solution that might work.

Naturally after WW II the Soviets went after all the German rocket and autobahn engineers they could capture and sent east. Our CIA was doing similar personnel extractions out of Germany, of course.

Once the German autobahn engineers got to the US all the American cities started requiring much deeper and more complex highway preparation before the concrete was laid down. I was told by an Army engineer that the base of the roadbeds previously had only 8 layers and went to 12 with Nazi technology.

The post-war pre-Cold War kidnappings of Nazi autobahn engineers is not as well known as the similar kidnapping of rocket engineers. This is thought to be because reporters were enamored with the technology of rockets but considered highways too mundane to report on.

The other reason why the story isn't too well known is that I only just now made it up. Although I did hear the story on the layers of sand and gravel underneath highways from an Army engineer. The problem with the disinterested reporters, while totally made up, certainly seems plausible.

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August 10, 2010 10:12 AM    in reply to Richardxx

well played.

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August 9, 2010 7:18 PM   

I am thinking 'rode' as in 'rode hard and put away wet' in relation to riding a horse or in this case a bike..

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August 9, 2010 8:33 PM    in reply to Bruce Webb

I'm thinking more like road as in "road kill" which is what Hick will make of this character if, God willing, he wins the primary against his equally worthy opponent.

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August 9, 2010 7:25 PM   

I wonder if he stays off the interstate as well. After all, it was modeled in part on the Autobahn, a brainchild of Adolf Hitler. Driving on the Interstate is supporting National Socialists!

(Makes as much sense as what he said.)

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August 9, 2010 7:28 PM   

Typical gooberism:

(1) Make outlandish, vague almost-accusation;
(2) When pressed for details or evidence, dodge the question and declare that you're merely "concerned" about what TEH LIBERALZ "may" be doing to whatever wherever. YOU KNOW THEY'RE DOING *SOMETHING* TO UNDERMINE AMERICA.
(3) Repeat until you have a teabagger rally.

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August 9, 2010 7:38 PM   

"...Maes just road right on ahead."

I've seen "road" used like this more than once recently it seems like. Is this a new blogger way of talking like yez and all that stuff?

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August 9, 2010 8:18 PM   

Maybe it was roed, as in Maes continued throwing eggs. Maes is definitely fishy and I don't expect to land this thing hook, line and sinker. He's just bobbing along.

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August 10, 2010 2:03 AM    in reply to Ken Grubb

It's more difficult to do three line humor, isn't it? More verbiage gives a better shot at a humorous narrative.

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August 9, 2010 8:36 PM   

Is it possible, just a thought but, I don't know, could the GOP be roding this anti-intellectual horse just a bit too far?

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August 9, 2010 8:39 PM   

Our Sharron has another recruit to her band of courageous patriots who will not sugarcoat any of their ideas just to win elections. Dan Maes proudly stands up against the UN bike plot because it is the right thing to do. Dan, don't ever change!

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August 9, 2010 10:53 PM    in reply to barryashe

hey sailor, new tag i see. looooser

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August 10, 2010 12:10 AM    in reply to barryashe

I'm with YOU, Barry!! I mean, we MUST fight back against little American boys and girls riding bicycles! It must stop, and it must stop NOW!! I say ... NO Bicycles for American little children!! Not now, not ever!! And if they DO ride their bikes, it must be IN HEAVY TRAFFIC, not on a pinko bike path!! The Founding Fathers and the Framers of the U.S. Constitution did not fight their way up San Juan Hill and Mount Suribachi at Gettysburg just so some family could ride their bikes! I mean what's next? Are we gonna sit back and let public schools be taken over by the government?

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August 10, 2010 2:26 AM    in reply to BluGrass

Hey! You're right! If you look at pictures of the roads in China what do you see? Bicyclists as far as the eye can see. And where do all the bicycles in Walmart come from? China, of course.

This isn't just a UN plot! This is a plot from the People's Republican of China after they took control of the UN!!

Dan missed that, didn't he? But Dan Maes is a Republican, isn't he? He would never out the People's Republican of China. That should be obvious.

I've been talking to people who study at Glen Beck University. It's all so clear now. The connections are obvious! (And they suggest the use of exclamation marks, too!) The connection is so obvious they never thought we would get it! Republic. Republican. With the bicycles. The Communists running the People's Republican of China are the same as our American Republicans!! But the Chinese dropped the "an" and tried to fool us into missing the connection!!

It's the Bicycle plot that has given them away, and Dan Maes has exposed the connection - after Glenn Beck showed us how to see it. It's just not easy to make all the connections without inspired leaders like Dan Maes and Glenn Beck to lead the way.

I'll never see a Republican or a bicycle the same way again.

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August 10, 2010 7:21 AM    in reply to Richardxx

Points for content, but it needs more exclamation marks, and would be more convincing with some ALL CAPS.

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August 10, 2010 10:14 AM    in reply to Early Out

all good points, but his logic was impeccable.

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August 9, 2010 9:22 PM   

The Common Good is The Enemy of all Republicans.

So vote to ruin the country if you are a repub. After all, think of all the fetuses you can save to be abused by unwed mothers who don't want them. Oh -- and whom you can refuse to help out with health care and other things that could help the innocents that the repubs could care less about once they are born.

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August 9, 2010 10:02 PM   

Well if we are playing spelling police, I'd like to nominate
the word "reign" for correction. Even TPM makes the mistake. It is constantly being used in the context of getting something under control. "We need to reign him in."


Uh...no. The word is "rein" and refers to bringing something under control. It comes from the word "reins" -- the two straps attached to the bit a rider uses to control her horse.

"Reign" means to rule, as a king would reign over his country.

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August 10, 2010 2:36 AM    in reply to Jim3K

Another liberal trying to take government control over everything. Who made you the government? Reign? Rein? Rain? Ran? Rayn?

Who cares? Spelling is for those trying to communicate, not for those who have no competence but demand to be in charge of the government. I'm not going to give up my spelling preferences to some government bureaucrat or to a pointy-headed intellectual!

If I'm a Libertarian I demand the right to spell any damned way I please! Ayn Rand wasn't restricted in how she spelled her name, was she?

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August 10, 2010 9:48 AM    in reply to Jim3K

Elitist hippie pinko.

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August 10, 2010 9:39 PM    in reply to Jim3K

""Reign" means to rule, as a king would reign over his country."


So now when we hear "raining cats and dogs" , we have to decide if it's really "reining cats and dogs" or "reigning cats and dogs"; and have to decide if we need a raincoat, a leash, or if the animals are really in control ?

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August 9, 2010 10:40 PM   

I'm glad he explained, I thought that he was trying to differentiate himself from reality.

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August 9, 2010 11:32 PM   

Unlike bike paths, air travel actually does function under a variety of UN-related agreements. We must therefore ban all air travel. Especially by, you know, conservatives.

And why stop there? Broadcasting operates under UN-related agreements, as do cellular communications, as does the internet. Therefore, I hereby decree that all conservatives must stop using cell phones, TV, and the internet. And don't get me started on all the foreign parts of foreign and "domestic" cars these days.

But actually, riding a bike ... as long as it's, y'know, an American-made bike and good luck with THAT ... well, riding a bike is actually ok for conservatives. No planes, phones, computers, TV's or cars. I hope this is clear.

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August 9, 2010 11:42 PM   

Attention all car-poolers: Cease and desist!
Your actions are not compatible with God-fearing, patriotic American values, you damned Socialists, you.

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August 10, 2010 2:40 AM    in reply to labman57

Right! Car poolers, get out and start walking.

Oh, and hand me your keys.

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August 10, 2010 12:33 AM   


Geees Eric, could it be that your undies are too tight?
But I guess it is all about, "Any story that takes the focus away from the First Lady".
This is like the guy at the Welfare interview, down town that drives up in his new "Lambo" parks it in front of the County Office building, in the red zone to collect his check.
This is the High Life on our dime.
It is not a crime until someone drops a dime or vote the scum out of the Whitehouse.

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August 10, 2010 1:43 AM    in reply to inokeah

Yes!! Riding a bicycle is exactly the same as Welfare Cheats Who Drive Lamborghinis! You've got it!
Oh, wait, no. I'm sorry.... what's your point again? That bike trails are for scum? No, that would be stupid to say. That the First Lady shouldn't go on vacation.... because... why? Well, no, that would be moronic to say.
Oh, I know........ you're bringing up "Welfare Recipients" because Obama and his wife are black! Is that it, my friend? A little racism thing going on here?

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August 10, 2010 12:39 AM   

Me rike Chinese peasant !

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August 10, 2010 12:45 AM   

It is a matter of record that the UN promotes the following, in addition to clean drinking water:

Access to Electricity
Elimination of malnutrition
Agricultural development
Literacy
The elimination of smallpox and malaria
Hospitals and medical care in rural areas

I look forward to Maes explaining to all Americans how we can organize to oppose these dangerous and insidious ideas.

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August 10, 2010 7:09 PM    in reply to bluestatedon

I believe the organization you're looking for is commonly known as "the Republican Party". They're against pretty much all of those, especially for poor people. ;)

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August 10, 2010 9:28 AM   

Honestly, anymore, can you expect anything else from a GOP candidate? They really are scraping the dregs from the bottom of their barrel, looking for another person to represent the Lowest Common Denominator voter, another like Sarah Palin, Sharon Angle, (who's not a right angle, but something more obtuse), Michele Bachman, and Rand Paul. All of them in prior elections would probably be the fringe candidate for some nut job, third (or fourth) party, the ones representing the alien and UFO spotters, who like it or not, are a part of our population.

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August 10, 2010 11:08 AM   

Come October 31st, knock on Mr. Maes door and shout "Trick or Treat for UNICEF".
That'll scare the bejeezus out of him.

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August 10, 2010 11:38 AM   

ROFLOL. The vast communist / New World Order / One World conspiracy rolls on. Today the bicycles tomorrow the world. LOL Thebig - just read your posting. Excellent.

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August 10, 2010 12:18 PM   

Bicycles are a Communist plot to steal the purity of our essence!

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Don

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August 10, 2010 1:18 PM   

he entirely repeated himself word for word when asked about what is with the UN program he has a problem with...yet didn't answer the question. Typical Republican.

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August 10, 2010 2:47 PM   

Bikes Belong.

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August 10, 2010 5:25 PM   

The CRM 114 is broken!

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August 10, 2010 7:24 PM   

Is this a RW plot to put The Onion out of business?

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August 10, 2010 7:25 PM   

Is this a RW plot to put The Onion out of business?

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August 11, 2010 3:26 AM   

The trouble with Republicans is that they have no memory -- long-or short-term. They can't recall what lies they told days before and thus contradict them with other lies. And at least one of them apparently doesn't remember that Republican President Eisenhower's physician (Dr. White?) urged everyone to ride a bicycle as the best form of exercise possible for ensuring a healthy heart, etc. Or does this date me?

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August 15, 2010 11:02 PM   

"June

"The trouble with Republicans . . ."

is that they exist.

"at least one of them apparently doesn't remember that Republican President Eisenhower's physician (Dr. White?) urged everyone to ride a bicycle as the best form of exercise possible for ensuring a healthy heart, etc. Or does this date me?"

On top of which there's a bicycle path named for White along the Charles River. And it isn't on the Commie-ist side of it!

Here's the connection, of course: H. G. Wells said that he was comforted about the prospects for the world when he saw a person riding a bicycle. Wishing that the world does well is obviously a UN/Commie-ist/Socialist/Nazi plot to undermine the multinational oil corporations. In sum, they're out to get Dick "Dick" Cheney.

And: Wells was a Socialist.

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