terrorism
The main political news in the world right now is that allegedly rape-y IMF Frenchman, because he resigned his job as chief of the International Monetary Fund. Surprising, too, because most people just figured he would run the IMF from prison. (This is how it works at the World Bank.) Also, and just like Tupac, [...]
An update on the DOOR-KNOCKING TERROR IN THE SKY: The man, Rageh Almurisi, 28, may have thought it was a rest room. “He’s not a terrorist, trust me,” said his cousin Rageh Almoraissi, 29, who owns a store in Vallejo, Calif. “You don’t knock on a door as a terrorist act. I think it was [...]
The conservative Internet has uncovered UNMISTAKABLE EVIDENCE that The Muslims of America are planning to set aside their Sharia checklist for a moment to avenge the death of Osama bin Laden. On Sunday, some guy from Vallejo, California on a flight from Chicago to San Francisco went nuts, screaming and pounding on the cockpit door, [...]
Is Osama bin Laden really dead? Not if the ability to make America laff is any indication! Perhaps the hated terrorist will always be alive in the part of our heart that makes us chuckle. This video is sung in Arabic or something. Swedish?
This weekend, the U.S. released parts of videos found on the number of hard drives that were not used by Osama bin Laden for illegally downloaded Wes Anderson movies. The videos, such as the one above of the famewhore murderer watching himself on teevee and switching the channel when his friend Barry Hussein comes on [...]
Sure, everyone, talk about Osama bin Laden all you want, just ignore that Harry Reid ALSO ALMOST DIED this morning. Whatever would this country do if Harry Reid was not the Senate majority leader? Replace him with Chuck Schumer or Dick Durbin and promptly forget he existed? Yes, probably. But maybe we would take weeks [...]
In addition to bin Laden, at least three other people were killed in the operation, U.S. officials said, including a man they believe to be one of Bin Laden’s sons. Officials said that the action also claimed the life of a woman whom one of bin Laden’s aides used as a human shield, they said. [...]
Janet Napolitano has had a major breakthrough, people! A few days ago, Janet slipped and hit her head on her bathroom sink while trying to drink out of the toilet like an animal does, and bam!, an image of the flux capacitor a terror alert system with only two terror-colors appeared in her head. It [...]
On this day many awful years ago, Bill Clinton’s government bulldozed and burnt down a rural house full of children and their moms. Why? Eh, who knows. Every couple of years the U.S. government needs to randomly massacre a bunch of its citizens just to keep everybody else in line. (Honestly, if you believe the [...]
Growing hysteria about radiation-rich tap water deemed “unfit for babies” (someone’s picky!) has led to a bottled water shortage in Tokyo. And while supermarkets have plenty of vegetables and fine meats, there’s hardly any instant noodles to purchase — not even for ready money. (Similar to a glass of water, a Styrofoam cup of chicken-flavored [...]
Rep. Peter King (R-Xenophobia) is finally starting up his very special hearings today, in which he calls before his committee a bunch of Muslims so King, an IRA terrorist, can be filmed telling them their religion is pure murder. But that’s not all! To sweeten the spectacle, King “revealed” to Politico that he has been [...]
With his AHH, MUSLIMS! hearings scheduled to begin this week, unfortunate Congressman Peter King has allegedly received numerous death threats and angry phone calls — more irrefutable evidence which proves Muslims are Extreme like the X Games, Q.E.D. The hearings will proceed as planned of course because when you don’t waste taxpayer dollars investigating radical [...]
Devious Lady GaGa CD-RW terrorist Bradley Manning was charged yesterday with “aiding the enemy,” which is punishable by death. (Hillary Clinton will sit on him until he dies.) In the meantime, the Army has decided that Bradley Manning needs to take off his clothes and then stand around naked in his prison cell for hours, [...]
