Silicon Valley to get its own poet laureate? |And here I thought technology was killing our brainses. And that Christian was in Calgary not Cali… Hm.

The idea of granting a little poetic license began before the economy took a nose-dive last fall. But the board decided to go ahead.

“It does feel like a very positive move,” said Liz Kniss, president of the Santa Clara County Board of Supervisors. “We said we should have something that really does act as a counterpoint to this financial crisis that we’re in.”

Officials are looking to get their words’ worth out of the new laureate. They’re paying a small $4,000 stipend for the two-year post, using money from hotel taxes that already is dedicated to supporting the arts.

Candidates, who must be published poets and five-year residents of the county, will be expected to do more than come up with the write stuff. One of the new laureate’s duties will be to undertake a project to make poetry more available and accessible to people in their everyday lives.

Four lousy grand for two years? Are you kidding me? People in coffee shops tip that much there. Four thousand dollars isn’t a stipend, it’s the estimated worth of a skidmark on Bill Gates’ tighty-whiteys. Give me a fucking break you cheapskates. Why not buy them a sandwich and tell them you won’t give them money because you know they’ll just go spend it on metaphors or something and you don’t want to enable that kind of behaviour. What are you going to do, tie it to a string and drag it through the Bowery hoping someone will bite? GAWD!