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Recently in Awkward Airplanes Category


Submitted without comment. Levity courtesy of reader WingBender:
Meet the Boeing family of wide body jetliners

787:
She is drop-dead gorgeous, she has all the "right" friends, and all the boys want to date her. She loves spending time at the spa, and she is addicted to social media. Predictably, she is a drama queen. Every little problem gets blown out of proportion, resulting in tears and tantrums. She has an attitude of entitlement, believing that everyone exists to serve her needs and desires. 

767: He isn't terribly smart, or good-looking, or popular, or talented. He is a little clumsy and socially awkward. Though he is a diligent and reliable worker, his only real option for the future is to go into the military, because frankly he has little prospect of finding employment in the private sector. But bless his heart, we love and adore him.

777: He's the family overachiever. Eagle Scout, 4.0 average, captain of the football team, scholarship offers flowing in, a gorgeous and smart girl friend. He wonders to himself how he could possibly be related to this cast of characters, and secretly wishes he weren't.

747: Quiet and studious, she tends to keep to herself. She's a bit heavy and has a touch of asthma. She seems wise beyond her years, and is burdened by an unspoken sadness. Yet she is unfailingly loyal and will go to the wall for you. Others would do the same for her in an instant.
787 First Delivery Header


EVERETT -- I've been following the 787 for almost five years now and surprises came at every turn, yesterday was no different.

Boeing invited the media to come on-board Airplane 24 (JA802A) yesterday, the second 787 for delivery to All Nippon Airways, and we went hands-on - or in this case "hands-off" - with one of the Dreamliner's more novel features. ANA, the launch customer since 2004, and now proud 787 owner, selected an automatically lowering toilet seat option for its lavatories. 

"This would solve so many fights at home," joked (we assumed) Flightglobal Americas Editor, Stephen Trimble.

The hands-free flush sensor is a standard feature for the new jet, which will be handed over to its first customer in an official ceremony Monday morning. 

This is what I call nose-to-tail innovation.
Boeing has confirmed Saturday's 787 flight test completion.

And now your moment of Zen:

otto.jpg
The title of this post speaks for itself: I'm on vacation!

I'll be back on Monday, August 16 after taking a much needed breather. I'm taking advantage of the August lull to slow down, recharge and get ready for the fall season which is already shaping up to be just as packed as the summer was. I'll have fresh content all week - including Movie Monday - so no need to re-direct your browsers elsewhere.

In the meantime, I'm leaving Otto in change. 
A little Friday laugh for everyone as The Onion tries its hand at aerospace journalism, and single-handedly wins the week.
Boeing Lays Off Only Guy Who Knows How To Keep Wings On Plane
August 6, 2010 | ISSUE 46•31

CHICAGO--With the airline industry continuing to suffer under the ongoing recession, the Boeing Company was forced Monday to lay off Al Freedman, the only guy left at the corporation who knows how to keep wings from falling off planes. "We used to have a whole team of engineers who knew how to make the wings stay on, but those days are long gone," Boeing CEO James McNerney, Jr. said. "We'll make it work, though. The wings are not necessarily the most important part of the plane, anyway." McNerney added that at least they were able to save the job of the guy who knows how to prevent jet engines from exploding.
ZA001-inverted-supersonic.jpg
Someone has a sense of humor at Boeing.

I got an interesting email yesterday from someone familiar with the 787's flight test plan. They said that ZA001 was scheduled to conduct "inverted supersonic operations" today, April 1. Yes, that's right, upside down faster than the speed of sound flight tests. During that same block of testing, the company's first 787 would be taking on some "90 degree bank sideslips" with both Rolls-Royce and General Electric engines. The same source added that only staff with a positive 9G (and negative 9G) medical clearance were allowed on the flight.

I was able to confirm that this was, in fact on the schedule, and it was absolutely, unequivocally an April Fools Joke, and a darn good one at that. Well played, Boeing, well played. I liked this one better than last year's Concorde's March 31st return to flight, which nearly broke my heart.

PS I'm still waiting on my ±9G medical clearance.
A350circuitcity.jpg
I may have to create a new tag for the blog called awkward airplanes now that I have a second post to go along side this gem from the British Airways catalog. Special thanks to Andrew Sulimoff who spotted this A350 XWB in an ad for Circuit City in his email this morning. As far as I can tell, its inclusion in the ad is completely inexplicable. I'll just scratch my head about this one.
If you look closely, you might just be able to see what's amiss with this 1:250 scale model of this 787 as advertised in the British Airways in-flight catalogue. 

I'm looking at you wing-to-body join team.

787wing2body-oops.jpgHat tip to Crispin Maunder for the find.

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