back to top Dealing with attitudes to HIV and your friends
When you’re young, there’s going to be a lot of stuff going on in your life – school, friends, weekends, your family – some of it great, some of it difficult. Whilst most of the issues that you face may be the same as many of your friends, HIV can add some extra things that you need support with.
Disclosure to friends
Telling people that you have HIV is known as ‘disclosing’. It can be a big decision to share your status with a friend. It can bring you closer and create another source of support. But, it is a good idea to plan how you will tell the person and to consider what to do if they don't react in the way you expect.
If you decide that disclosing is something you want to do, you can make a personal plan – when will you tell them? Where is a good place to be? How much do they already know about HIV? You could get them to read 'HIV and AIDS for young people' or give them a copy of AVERT's Educator Booklet so they know the facts. How much do you want to tell them? Only that you have a blood condition, or do you want to name it? Asking questions like ‘What do you think about HIV?’ beforehand may help you to gauge how much they know and how they may react.
When disclosing, remind your friend that this is just something that affects your immune system – it doesn’t change who you are or your friendship.
You may decide that you don’t want to tell anyone at your school, but to share your status with people from a peer support group, where people will be in a better position to understand.
Challenging stigma and bullying
These days, many young people feel that they are part of a generation where HIV is NORMAL, but others still feel isolated and unable to talk to anyone about their status.
One of the reasons for this is that unfortunately, HIV is sometimes connected with something called ‘stigma’. This is when people think that somebody is less valuable because of a certain thing about them, like where they live, what language they speak, what colour hair they have or their HIV status. It’s very wrong, but is usually because people don’t understand the thing that they’re passing judgement about.
HIV-related stigma can involve a lot of different types of behaviour, such as name-calling, bullying, not wanting to touch somebody who is HIV-positive, or not letting somebody join in with things. If you experience it, it’s really good to talk to somebody – to try to work out a way to challenge it together.
Advocate!
You need to install Adobe Flash player to view AVERT's videos. Click on the logo below to install Flash player.
Young people living with HIV challenge stigma
Sometimes, the issue of stigma is made worse because information about HIV and AIDS doesn't properly show the views and experiences of HIV-positive people:
“It makes me a little mad when I see things on T.V about HIV…they’re trying to help me so I cant really get mad at them, but it really does hurt sometimes.” Kathy, HIV-positive young person
Getting involved in advocacy activities, which is about getting your voice heard as a young person living with HIV, can help you to challenge stigma with other people who may have been through similar experiences. UNAIDS (a big international HIV organisation) has a tool-kit for young people living with HIV who want to advocate for their rights. Sharing your story or posting about how HIV affects you on facebook can link you to other people who understand how important the issues that you discuss are.
