She's creative and emotional, and romantic too, believing the best of people and ignoring faults – especially in her own children. At her best she's a fairy princess, glamorous and wise. At her worst, she's a martyr and victim, draining anyone who comes into her space. Read more here.

If you're a Pisces, you've probably already heard that you share a sign – and an addictive personality – with Liz Taylor, Liza Minelli and Kurt Cobain. Not only do Pisces like to lose themselves in the dreamy, out-there feeling that only hooch can give, but they build up a mighty tolerance fast. Read more here.

From the moment that you meet him you will feel like you have known him for years. He is very attentive, listens to your every word that you can’t help but feel cared for like a queen. Read more here.

She is an idealist, all she really wants is for everyone to live happily ever after. Once you know that, it takes very little to keep your Piscean woman happy. Read more here.

Ariens are friendly, social creatures with amazing people skills, a magnetic smile, and a dungeon behind a false wall in their home in which they torture small animals and drink blood out of the skulls of their enemies.. Read more here.

Fat, lazy and hedonistic by instinct, Taureans left to their own devices are the sign most likely to drop out of society to live a shoeless existence in a wigwam on a communal farm with a whole bunch of other dreadlocked losers. Read more here.