Category Archives: Prewalk

Lost Generation

This isn’t about me and it’s not about my divorce.

It’s about thousands upon thousands of divorces needlessly destroying the lives of kids and adults alike.  Children are being used as pawns – stripped of loving parents for cash by corrupt family courts.  These are not exceptions.  They are the rules.  And lawyers siphoning helpless people makes divorce the fourth biggest cause of bankruptcy in the US.

While the issues are both heated and complex, identifying what needs to be fixed is very clear: family courts.

The problem, in fact, is so significant that people who are not even touched by divorce should be in the loop.  Watch Divorce Corp for starters.  A generation of kids are being irreversibly harmed by an aggressive government system that operates without regard to the US Constitution.

10 million kids live without a dad, 2 million live without a mom and countless more have their access limited because limited access is a cash cow in America.

I’m working to get the word out; to bring attention to a social issue that affects us all.  Most of all, I’m fighting for simple, clear legislature enforcing Annual Elective 50/50 Custody to save our kids.

On October 15th, in anticipation of the Divorce Corp Reform Conference, I will begin a 400+ mile walk from Boston to Washington DC to attract media attention to this critical topic.

Please join me.  How do you want to define your role?

  • Walk with me: I have setup this web site to candidly show most legs of my journey.  In general, each day consists of three 5 to 7 mile sessions.  Explore the start dates, times and places, pick one (or part of one) and join me.
  • Write your storyNaysayers are quick to write us off as a small, extreme group of upset divorcees.  The fact is that the vast majority of us are in awful circumstances affecting our kids while driving us into poverty.  The best way for us to convey this is to share as many stories as possible.  Share as much or as little as you like.  Be anonymous if you prefer.  But please tell us your story.  It helps the cause.
  • Sponsor Me: I do have costs and will accept sponsorship to get the word out.
  • Loan me a Couch: I’m doing this on a shoestring budget and open to overnight accommodations along the way.
  • Admin Support: I need some minor administrative support in coordinating my schedule and keeping this web site updated while the walk occurs.  Requires one hour per day for the entire month.

I will be actively blogging on this site but want this introduction to remain the home page for now.  Watch for updates through the date links to the left.

100+ Blocked Visitations OK with Judge Guasco

Like the ending of a predictable cheap horror movie, Judge Guasco simply rubber stamped the court evalutor’s slanted recommendation to give a parental alienator full legal custody and physical custody six days of the week.

  • Tom openly admitted to repeatedly blocking visitation keeping two boys from their mother for nearly a year
  • Tom’s paid expert witness and family therapist determined mom was dangerous without ever meeting her
  • Tom testified on the stand to a history of untreated paranoia

But in all fairness, the court had a strong counterpoint: mom wasn’t always making it simple for Tom or the courts to determine how much money she had and where it was.  And for not being more candid about where her money is, the court stripped her of her kids.

There are two camps reading this blog:

  1. Those incapable of believing such a ludicrous claim; quite certain I’ve left out some important detail to skew the audience like abuse or drug use.  Nope.
  2. Those bored with this story because they’ve heard it a hundred times and they know the simple truth: this is the American family court child trafficking system and there is no justice

There is nothing I could say that could wrap up the story better than Tom’s own words:

Stay tuned for the late November trial when the court calculates Tom’s windfall in child support and sanctions; financial rewards for legalized child abduction.

Help.

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Nope.  It’s not all about cash (although donations never hurt).  I need people to click.  Yes, click.  Up all night wondering what you can focus on beyond your divorce hell?  Well here ya go.  Some late night time wasters that will help our cause:

#1 – Start Alerting the Media
I have my own campaign but it sure can’t hurt to put a bug in their ear.  Let them know I’m in town shortly and that this is important to you.

Step One: Explore the map.  Jot down the metropolitan city and the date I pass through.
Step Two: Find the corresponding TV stations, radio, newspaper, etc.
Step Three: Send a heartfelt letter asking them to cover the walk.

#2 – Check Out My Legs
The entire walk is 87 legs.  Again, see the map.  Going on foot has a lot of obstacles: roads without enough space on the side to walk safely, impassable bridges, etc.  To avoid these, I’ve painstakingly followed the route via google earth for the first week or so into New Haven.

I still have most of the route to detail and I’m basically a tourist.  In the end, it’s usually pretty simple. (i.e. Route 1 to Main St to Charles Ave.).  Doesn’t sound like much now but walking 20 miles out of my way into a dead end kinda sucks.

If you opt to help here, simply use the leg number(s) in an email subject and send them to patrick@parrotworks.com.  Thanks.  I’ll try to update below to prevent duplicating effort.

#3 – Accommodations
I still need accommodations for several legs.  I don’t take up much space.

#4 – Rides & Sag Wagon
Some supporters have indicated a desire to join the walk but are shying away from a five mile leg.  For some of the legs I have accommodations that don’t match the exact leg finish so I need to shuttle myself around a bit.

Sag wagon drivers are also welcome to either follow for safety and/or shuttle backpack supplies to lighten the load.

Thanks again for all your help!

Patrick

I Support Parental Alienation!

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Take your pick:
1. Give up the First Amendment
2. Redefine Parental Alienation
3. Support Parental Alienation

Too many Americans jump on one side of a bipolar issue with little philosophical debate. They don’t want to take the time to understand the issue.  They want to click Like and call it a day.

Well I bear some bads news: You get to pick between strict PA legislation and your first amendment rights.  Yep.  Read the fine print.  The following are some selected lines of Linda Gottlieb’s Eight Symptoms of PA:

4) Programming the child against the targeted parent by belittling, criticizing, and deprecating the targeted parent in the child’s presence.

6) Interference (including spoken) with and not being supportive of contact between the targeted parent and the child. This contact includes the telephone, text messaging, e-mailing, skype, or other methods.

9) Defying the targeted parent’s supervision (including spoken) and authority.

People have a constitutional right to speak to their kids.  This includes brainwashing if they so choose.

Is this right?  Hell no.  However, it is a constitutional right that we need to be extremely careful how we tread on.  Or maybe the government should be watching our homes to censor what we say to our kids?  Well that is what you are saying?  Aren’t you?

My 17-year old won’t do the dishes.  I call him a jerk.  Should that mean he should be taken away for his safety?

These are slippery slopes my friends and I don’t have perfect answers to end abuse everywhere.

A good first step is Annual Elective 50/50 custody in cases where there is not proof of physical abuse.  It curtails 100% abduction scenarios – the number one tool of parental alienators.

 

Epidemics

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Dear Ms. Murwell & Mr. Greenberg -

One of scariest threats to Americans is epidemics.

We have been living an epidemic for decades which is devastating the economic and social well-being of families and children: forcibly stripping parents from children with parental alienation and a family court system which has no accountability. Like AIDS, the numbers may only be tens of thousands of children for the moment but it is growing each day.

Damaged kids of unequitable divorce custody arrangements (including total elimination of one parent) are more suseptible to poverty, teen pregnancy, substance abuse, financial devistation, violence and trauma. There is considerable statistical evidence to back this up.

It is irresponsible for the HHS to look away when the word “divorce” appears since half the marriages of the population you serve have been victims of it.

I realize that turning any ship takes strength and time. I am hopeful you have the courage to chart a course towards a better future for us all. Please actively support equitable custody laws for the safety and health of our kids.

You have both the power and responsibility to do what is right. Protecting our children from harm should be your objective even if that harm originates from our government itself. Our founding fathers knew a system of checks and balances would make our nation strong. The judicial branch needs to be put in check. No one else is listening and children are suffering.

This is your moment to shine.

Please consider:

I appreciate your careful consideration and look forward to your response -

Patrick Glynn

Subject of Subjectivity

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The family courtroom has become an extremely subjective environment mostly due to lack of oversight.  The exact same laws are frequently used in completely different ways even by the same judge on the same day in the same courtroom.

If it wasn’t a tragedy, it would be a comedy.  Sometimes I feel like my chances of increased custody come down to whether the judge slept well the night before or ate a good breakfast.

Remember the old TV courtroom dramas where attorneys would quote landmark cases to make their point?  Not in family court.  Why?  Because everything is subjective.

If you want to reform family courts you need to eliminate subjectivity.  As it stands, the judges already have the power to override virtually anything that they choose so the only way to insure our laws are carried out as intended is to remove subjectivity.

This is a extremely simple task but requires writing laws which are a far cry from the norm.  Laws need to be:

Dichotomous
This is essential.  We can swiftly make things happen when the judge has two choices.  This is why I am a strong proponent of an Annual Elective 50/50 custody law.  As a sweeping generalization, it will force the courts to do more harm than good.  Judges have only two choices:

  1. Deem there is enough evidence to support physical or sexual harm to the kids, or
  2. Split custody 50/50

Concise
This issue cuts across all laws and government entities.  Our ice caps are rapidly melting and the best we can do is spend our time adding unnecessary wording to laws to insure their review, reading and the ensuing debate take forever.

The First Amendment was drafted in 1791 and has served us well ever since (in places it’s enforced, anyways).  Read it and weep: 45 words.

Amendment I
Congress shall make no law respecting an establishment of religion, or prohibiting the free exercise thereof; or abridging the freedom of speech, or of the press; or the right of the people peaceably to assemble, and to petition the Government for a redress of grievances.

I am extremely optimistic about Divorce Corp and dozens of other organizations making headway in getting laws on the books. Unfortunately laws written like this one are like driving the football 90 yards down field and then handing it to the other team.

Excerpt from NJ Alimony Reform Bill:
“Exceptional circumstances which may require an adjustment to the duration of alimony include: …any other factors or circumstances that the court deems equitable, relevant and material.

.i.e. whatever the judge wants.

Love Conquers All

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Even when mired in divorce reform and parental alienation, our optimistic human nature returns us to the promise of love.

Recently Keith Marsolek posted this at PAWWSG:

We have spent trillions of dollars on the war on poverty. Its still here. We have spent billions on the war on drugs. All still here even though we have made it all a crime.

The point is, making something or an act criminal does not make it go away. If history teaches us anything, it only makes it worse as this seems to be our nature.

Stop hating your ex and start loving your kids. If you dont, by the time you realize it they will be grown adults and off on thier own. You will have spent thousands of hours trying to make someone change who wont ever and you will still have PA.

Keith -

Bravo.  Love can conquer all.

A loving relationship is a constant ebb and flow in finding equilibrium.  Because we are human, part of our natural response system is to be angry and to hate.  The key is that we recognize our own anger and channel it appropriately.  People that can never look within themselves and see they are the source of their own anger can not be helped.

We aim to teach our children many things. The critical one is that they are safe and loved.  But another is that they have strong moral values.  And as any caring parent can tell you, teaching kids values creates conflict.  In cases of PA, many of us feel stripped of our parental right to teach values.  I believe this is untrue.  Children simply need to feel safe first.

Loving ourselves and our children should not need to compete with the needs of our spouse past the point of never regaining equilibrium.  And so the ultimate question in any loving relationship is when to stop giving because we believe we will receive nothing in return.  The end result being three possible scenarios:

1. We escape our relationships prematurely because we fear the slightest of signs (including anger).  Escaping could be physical, emotional or both.  Borderline is a common label here.

2. We continually pour love into a bottomless abyss believing that the equilibrium will return when, in fact, it will not.

3. Our relationship returns to equilibrium and we experience both love and the satisfaction of sustaining the relationship.

Love is perseverance beyond our own fears and losing people we love is part of life.

Love is a great strategy in getting our kids but people need to reflect on their own role in their loving relationships.

“Giving without expecting anything in return” is both a valid definition for love and an abuse victim.  And the only element differentiating the two is our own perspective.

PA vs. Custody

Thanks to family courts, Parental Alienation (PA) and custody are neatly packaged issues.  Parents use unbalanced custody as the key component in alienating their children.

But here’s a critical point: We can’t and shouldn’t legislate parental alienation.  The very real psychology behind the alienating parent is barely understood by the people in the field.  We can’t wait decades to educate a blind legal system on PA.  We need immediate laws enacted to protect children now that are easily understood and not subjective because alienating parents thrive on subjectivity.  They have taken your kids away from you in the best interest of the children.  They can prove it.  And any PA law on the books is actually simply more ammunition for alienating parents.

I recently came across this petition to end parental alienation.

People’s passion for their kids is real but this whole petition is misguided.  I implore you to change the messages you are sending to Congress.  Focus on custody — not parental alienation.

50/50 custody laws are the swiftest, best protection you will get from legislatures to protect you from being completely removed from your children’s lives.  And the sooner we can agree on this point, the sooner we’ll have the large number of unified voices we need to get the attention of our state and federal governments.

 

 

 

Emotional Upheaval

Divorce Corp. recently announced my walk on their Facebook page and, as anticipated, people jumped to support me with Likes and Shares. For a fleeting moment, it felt quite good.

Then the realization hit me.

This was the hundreds of horror stories I knew were out there.  Each well-intended word of support, represented more destroyed lives; People living in daily pain because a slanted system had stripped them of their kids.

My heart fell.

All of us have roles in bring light to the issue; to be catalysts of change.  Sometimes the emotions are too much to bare.  Laying in bed hoping the dreadful nightmare will end doesn’t seem to be doing the trick.  I guess today I’ll walk a bit.