Mike PearlVerified account

@MikeLeePearl

Staff Writer. mike.pearl@vice.com

Los Angeles
Joined July 2008

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  1. Anyone seen this movie The D Train with Jack Black? It is heavy as hell.

  2. Wishing I could just shoot Trump a text right now like, "hey"

  3. Hey TV writers, stop having people talk about "the Johnson account" for the same reason you stopped giving people 555 phone numbers

  4. FACT: Progress in computer technology led to a tragic 95% decrease in our use of the word "floppy."

  5. My ironic personal hell is I have to interview myself for half of eternity, and then transcribe it for the other half.

  6. Can't wait to read Franzen's new book as a series of screengrabs embedded in exasperated tweets.

  7. So what? One time MY editor stopped me from admitting I kinda like Mackelmore.

  8. Read my fact check on immigration myths unless you like believing wrong things.

  9. Is America Ready for Gonzo's New Nose Pubes?

  10. Read the interview where I talk "intactivism" with one of the rabbis who circumcise Los Angeles! Read it right now!

  11. Damn Google, calm down.

  12. I talked to about whether Trump's immigration plan will Make America Great Again™ (Spoiler: Nope)

  13. Just heard a dude say "according to evolutionary theory..." so obv I called the cops.

  14. How does the country of Wales even work if 100% of the men are named Dylan Jones, and 100% of the women are named Megan Jones?

  15. So thrilled to hear the sex party for the disabled went well! (And, sorry I used the o-word)

  16. Dream VP Announcement:

  17. I do not know who Pasquale is so this note on my desk is kicking my week off real weird.

  18. History teacher, 2093: "But of course we all know what finally stopped global warming in its tracks. Say it with me: ham-fisted street art!"

  19. Oh. Huh. Of course there's YouTube star fan fiction.

  20. Left some groceries in my car for while. Most of them were fine, but what happened to the margarine gave me PTSD.

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