So, this is a piece inspired by a recent thread on the sub, and I chose Hallgerd, Xiomara and Garaz from the books Vernaccus and Bourlor, Bone and Hallgerd's Tale as my framing device
It was quiet Loredas evening in King’s Ham, Hallgerd was staring down his empty mug in the tavern, when his usual drinking buddies Xiomara and Garaz walked in, swearing in profanity, Xiomara cursed: “ That damned Imperial had better not open up his shop again tomorrow, or he will be missing a tooth or ten”
“Bad day, was it?” Hallgerd asked.
Ordering a bottle of greef, Xiomara said:” Well, you can say that again. You see, I was strolling through the markets when I saw an Imperial pushing a trolley into the town, he was selling some gold ore at quite a low price. So, I bought a chunk for 100 septims, and it turned out, it was just some iron ore dipped in gold paint, you’d thought an Imperial would at least be honest with his wares, unlike the cats.”
Hallgerd laughed and replied:” Well, the Imperials were always shady and arrogant, check back tomorrow with him, he would be there, and he would swear on the divines that it was a gold ore. They have been that way ever since the Empire got Vvardenfell in their pockets.”
Sipping on his mead, Hallgerd continued: “ Have you seen the lighthouse in Seyda Neen? The crumbling tower was made by those bastards. You see, when the first group of Imperial officers came to Morrowind, they wanted to establish something, you know, like a giant reminder that Morrowind is an Imperial province. So, they built a Census and Excise Office to process the visitors, and a giant lighthouse to show off their power. Or so they thought.
The Imperial shipped a few architect over here and looked at the site, and sure enough, a week later, workers beginning working. It was only three weeks before the tower was complete, and the Imperials had something to show for. But the funny thing is, that these arrogant and snobbish big-shot architect forgot to account for the swamp-like nature of the ground the building was based on, they thought they are still in good ole’ Cyrodill. So, the building began to sink and topple overnight, and by the time sunlight shone upon the tower again, the upper half of the tower had little trouble looking down directly at the ground. For a few days, the building became the laughing stock of all the children in town, sailors and mariners would get confused and then laugh their hindquarters off when docking into the coast. And after a week, the Imperials decided that they couldn’t take it, so, they decided to reinforce the building. And well, they didn’t do it in broad daylight, because, apparently, it would be too obvious, so when the sun sets and the moon takes over the night skies, a group of workers would sneak into the building and reinforce it with pillars inside it, because they couldn’t build it outside as they wouldn’t want to let anybody know that they were repairing the tower. The plan was brilliant and well conceived, although it had one fatal flaw. The one fatal flaw that would be the doom of it, the one fatal flaw that would make it a laughing stock for people in the centuries to come, one fatal flaw that…”
“So what is it then, what’s the one fatal flaw?” asked Garaz impatiently.
“You see” Hallgerd smirked, “the fatal flaw was that the plan were complete and utter bullocks. The night was quiet, but the rhythmic hammering sound coming from the workers that were desperately trying to fix the tower was almost just shouting: ’Hey, we made a big mistake, and we are fixing it, but because we are always right about these stuff, we aren’t going to let you see us fixing it. So, we will just try to do it as sneaky as we can with all these clutters and noises’. The next morning, nobody said a word about what happened the night before, but everybody knew what they did, the taverns, the shops, the markets and even the docks were filled with laughter that the Imperials were scratching their heads trying to find out the reason behind. So, this went on for days, and finally when they were done with the tower, it finally stabilized. Though the tower could withstood the weight of the structure, the weathering and everything nature threw at it, the one thing it would always succumb to, was the laughter of the children that persisted even through today.”