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 Blog

05/10/09

Work has been keeping me from my JunkMales duties. Here's an insight into my work life, from my imaginary journal...

September 28th 2009

Another meeting – got tired of listening to people complaining – so asked them to do it in the style of Cornish Tin Miners. Next week Derek is going to bake a batch of pasties.

September 29th 2009

Slipped the words “bumsurfer” and “scrotalwart” into a budgeting spreadsheet – no one will notice. They didn't find the “fuckspanner” in the 2008 business plan either.

October 2nd 2009

Sandwich man came while I was in the bog and no-one came in to tell me. By 12:45 was so hungry that I ate the contents of the confidential shredding bin. The auditors have requested a stool sample just to be sure.

October 5th 2009

Got confused with the BT telephone conferencing service and had a very interesting call with some ladies from the Preston Womens Institute. They can't help us meet the system delivery dates – but they are confident they can deliver some jam to us some time before we go-live. Could be Damson, might be Greengage.