The prospect of a new Nicolas Winding Refn movie is akin to a trip to the dentist for me: long, painful, and full or regret over one's life choices. The Neon Demon will not change this perception of mine. I hated this movie, and the more I think about it the more I hate it. Unlike Refn's last film, the punishing, overwrought, and nihilistic Only God Forgives, there isn't even a kernel of an idea of a movie here. I loathed Only God Forgives but I'll at least credit Refn for crafting something with potential in its plot dynamics. In better hands, somebody could have done something with the setup for that movie. I don't think anyone could work with what Refn offers in The Neon Demon because he offers nothing. That's not entirely true. He offers pretty pictures and alluring shot compositions, bathing the screen in high-contrasting colors. What he doesn't offer is a story, or characters, or any reason that this movie shouldn't exist instead as a ten-minute short. Somebody enlighten me and tell me what exactly this vacuous and tedious art exercise offers. Perhaps I'm being too cruel so allow me to explain the plot. Jesse (Elle Fanning) is a 16-year-old girl fresh off the bus to L.A. She gets hired at a modeling agency and makes friends with a makeup artist, Ruby (Jena Malone), who also works in a coroner's office beautifying corpses. Jesse quickly rises through the ranks of the modeling world because of her fresh face and youthful, pure demeanor. She makes enemies with older models (Bella Heathcote, Abbey Lee) who feel threatened by her. And Keanu Reeves plays a sleazy motel owner who sticks a knife down Jesse's throat for fun. Or that was a dream. I think. Then there's a confrontation that includes necrophilia, murder, and cannibalism. And even after the cannibalism the movie still goes on for another fifteen minutes! The-Neon-Demon-Elle-Fanning-1000x520There is not nearly enough plot or any substance to carry out Refn's near two-hour running time, which becomes all the more obvious with one dreary, pretentious, artfully self-indulgent scene after another. There are long segments where I cannot even tell you from a literal level what is happening on screen. Is Jesse descending into madness? Is Jesse losing herself to the vanity of the industry in a heavy-handed visual metaphor? Does anything happening register with the slightest merit? Refn is possibly trying to tackle the same meandering dream logic that populates David Lynch's more obtuse filmmaking entries, like Lost Highway and Mullholland Drive (recently voted the top film so far of the twenty-first century by the BBC). I'm not a fan of untethered David Lynch but he will at least keep things interesting. The Neon Demon is a powerfully boring enterprise in annihilating audience patience. There's no there there. Another problem I have with Refn's movies is that he hangs much of his meandering on broad and obvious themes and assumes they're revelatory. Only God Forgives was all about the pointless nature of vengeance and cyclical violence, and you felt the pointlessness with one grisly and uncomfortable moment after the next. With The Neon Demon, Refn falls back on the most general of broadsides against the fashion industry. Did you know that people working in a surface-level industry could be shallow? Did you know that young women are exploited for their beauty and then quickly cast out? Did you know that succumbing to the appeals of vanity could be self-destructive? These are the most general themes and they are presented without commentary. It's like Refn thinks touching upon these shallow themes is enough substance to justify all the excesses. This is borderline unwatchable cinema. The plot is like Showgirls without the camp but still following some of the basic plot beats. There is nothing interesting about these characters at all and that's because they're not people but robotic figurines at best. They're dolls for Refn to pose and play around with his lights. It's like watching two hours of watching somebody rearrange fancy-looking furniture. The characters are just as significant as the nearest love seat. I've complained about all the empty space in Refn movies and The Neon Demon is no different. This movie is padded out exponentially to become Refn's longest movie of his career. He cares far more about his shot compositions and cinematography than storytelling. At this point I don't think Refn has any interest whatsoever in telling a story. He wants to construct a visually immersive film experience. The Neon Demon is little more than the misty atmosphere of the phantasmagorical. Refn deploys controversial imagery and plot elements but he deploys them in place of substance. Anybody can get a strong response by throwing in a necrophilia sex scene, but has that reaction been earned and has this moment been properly setup by careful development? Absolutely not. Things just happen. This was also billed as Refn's horror movie, but there's nothing genuinely terrifying, at least from an intentional standpoint. You don't feel any sense of danger or even a sense of uncertainty until the very end, and by then the movie has meandered far too much for the horror elements and gore to have an impact beyond lazy shock value. This is a movie where pretty people stand around and then, on the turn of a dime, do something outrageous. Refn hasn't laid the groundwork for a descent into mental instability with our lead character, which seems like the most obvious solution. I could see a Black Swan-style psychosexual story about obsession with perfection and how this drive blinds one woman into making a multitude of sacrifices, driving her over the edge and into murder. Black Swan was a great, often brilliant movie. Go watch Black Swan instead, folks. I think I have a solution that will benefit us all, dear reader. Nicolas Winding Refn should forgo the director's chair and devote his career to being a cinematographer. He has an alluring eye for visual compositions and a great feel for atmospheric lighting, but with each passing movie I feel the man's disdain for narrative filmmaking. His skill set is best utilized at making pretty pictures. Get him away from directing actors. Get him away from writing stories. Have adults in charge of the other aspects that make a movie what a movie should be. The Neon Demon is a confounding, obnoxious, obtuse, intellectually destitute and monotonous movie experience. It's frustrating to deal with the Cult of Refn in cinematic circles because I just cannot see what they see (I liked Drive well enough). The Neon Demon is too shallow and tortuous to be an insightful commentary on beauty, too oblique and maddeningly dreamlike to be an engaging story, and too devoid of interesting characters to hold your attention as they drift from one scene to the next. I'd be more forgiving of Refn's indulgences if he was a short filmmaker. I'd allow more latitude for experimentation. The Neon Demon is not a movie. It's a collection of half-formed, shallow ideas that Refn has thrown together, a whole lot of dead and empty space connecting them together, and an 80s synth score to underline the high-contrast colors. At this point I'd rather go back to the dentist than sit through another Refn film. Nate's Grade: D