OP
OP
Let's go y'all!
Let's go everyone!
Let's go mates!
Let's go! (no need to actually refer to the group itself in this context)
Four to start you off.
-
Ever wanted an RSS feed of all your favorite gaming news sites? Go check out our new Gaming Headlines feed! Read more about it here.
-
We have made minor adjustments to how the search bar works on ResetEra. You can read about the changes here.
Using "boys" to speak to everyone really needs to stop, and this is why.
- Thread starter astro
- Start date
Let's go y'all!
Let's go everyone!
Let's go mates!
Let's go! (no need to actually refer to the group itself in this context)
Four to start you off.
I think this is actually part of the problem. I used to feel this way too.
For people who are accustomed to using male-gendered language to refer to groups of people indiscriminately ("guys", "boys", etc) it can seem suddenly difficult to find the right way to address a group. I think your brain seeks some kind of specificity ("ladies and gentlemen") even though no specificity is actually required. Much of the United States, for example, already uses "y'all" to address groups of people in a gender-neutral way. This is common among black communities, the American South, and a lot of American youth.
I personally switched to "folks" a year or so ago and now I don't even think about it. I actually liked using "folks" because it sounded kind of jokey, like a stand-up comedian doing a bad bit, but over time I've come to realize how flexible it is. I use it when joking around with friends ("folks, let me tell ya") and at work ("thanks for coming to the meeting today, folks").
Chances are, you're already familiar with a lot of ungendered alternatives that you just don't think to use. Y'all, folks, gang, friends, etc. Some terms, like squad, are already incorporated in to slang for this purpose ("squad goals," "hey squad"). You just have to make a point to use those terms instead. It doesn't take long at all before it's second nature and you realize how easy it was to make the adjustment.
I generally use "Let's go lads" when typing and "Let's go guys" when speaking.
I use "B O I S" when I'm joking around, mostly. Also "mates". "Comrades" and "fellas" when I'm feeling the vibe. Or one of my favorites "Let's go my people". I'm trying to use this last one more frequently hahaha.
I use "B O I S" when I'm joking around, mostly. Also "mates". "Comrades" and "fellas" when I'm feeling the vibe. Or one of my favorites "Let's go my people". I'm trying to use this last one more frequently hahaha.
What should I say if I want to express intense hype or appreciation that isn't "yeah boiiiiiiii?"
A lot of people here seem to think "Guys" isn't gendered. It certainly is gendered, but some seem to feel it has evolved to be genderless. I don't think that's a view everyone holds, but I digress.
I personally see no reason we can't choose something that is explicitly genderless, like folks, people, all, y'all (Possibilities abound), but it's a judgement call on your part.
It's a simple thing, and it might mean a lot to someone else. So why not.
Agreed, though I'm originally from the south so y'all is second nature to me
OP
OP
It's in a DMC thread title that was up pre-launch recently. And "let's go boys!" and similar are all over gaming side
As someone who is non-native english speaker and tries to educate himself, since my sister coming out made me consider times I may have been insensitive, I'd ask:
When using english chats I tend to avoid gender assumptions ang go with "people", "folks" and similar, is there a proper gender neitral word?
When using english chats I tend to avoid gender assumptions ang go with "people", "folks" and similar, is there a proper gender neitral word?
Like today I saw the "boys" used on reddit and yeah, everytime I see it, it is meant in a tongue in cheek kinda way
This reminds me of military terms. The term "boys" refer to everyone. Its kind of like how i see girls calling each other "dude", or even "bra"
If I'm talking and they're not responding, do you think they'd still be offended with my use of gendered nouns?
Thanks for making this thread. It's been bothering me for a while as well and feels super exclusionary. I just tend to use words like "people" or "folks" or whatever else that is gender neutral and fits the context.
I'm really guilty of this.
"let us do this ladies!"
"Nice shot my good man."
"That was a good pass sir!"
"Oh Mylanta! Lets go kids!"
I really play with the same people almost all the time but my language might spill over with randos too just from habit.
"let us do this ladies!"
"Nice shot my good man."
"That was a good pass sir!"
"Oh Mylanta! Lets go kids!"
I really play with the same people almost all the time but my language might spill over with randos too just from habit.
I am guilty of using guys all the time.
I have wondered if anyone finds it odd but I think most people just accept it as a gender-neutral term now.
I have tried to stop using it all the time but it's hard to find alternatives that don't sound awkward or too formal (and I'm British so saying ya'll or folks isn't really an option).
I have wondered if anyone finds it odd but I think most people just accept it as a gender-neutral term now.
I have tried to stop using it all the time but it's hard to find alternatives that don't sound awkward or too formal (and I'm British so saying ya'll or folks isn't really an option).
I'm not a male. It doesn't bother me.
But there are people who think using y'all is worse?? Y'all is a great term and it's not gendered. Get over your aversion to it.
But there are people who think using y'all is worse?? Y'all is a great term and it's not gendered. Get over your aversion to it.
Is it though? I think language, all language, is constantly evolving. That includes the word "boys" or "bois". If time went on maybe "boys" will be widely accepted as a gender neutral thing as well. I know it's been used that way around me from time to time. Obviously I never would use it if someone was around who wouldn't like it, but I've barely ever heard anyone complain about it.
While I understand your point of view, why let something like this bother you so much? There are a lot of other things that could be addressed when it comes to toxicity in the gaming community. Also, even though you do feel that way, no one is trying to exclude you from gaming by slang words they may use when it comes to a group of people. It comes off like you think these people are attacking you by how they use words and that's simply not the case.
I think words like that work great. I like "yall" too, but some English speakers find it strange.
OP
OP
THe OP explains this. If you can't understand from that, the threadmark, and my replies ITT, I won't be able to convince you.
The only time I use boys is typically in a situation where I'm quoting something.
WHERE WE DROPPING BOYS!?
WE DID IT BOYS/BROS!!
The vast majority of the time when referring to a group I use guys though. I also use y'all quite a bit too.
WHERE WE DROPPING BOYS!?
WE DID IT BOYS/BROS!!
The vast majority of the time when referring to a group I use guys though. I also use y'all quite a bit too.
And I do understand that, there's nothing I want more in this life than to have people stop being so hateful towards one another.
However, unless you're playing in a designated group, most people won't even know these individuals are non-binary.
Unfortunately, it's just the easiest term to say because, as you said, gaming in the majority has been a male dominant hobby.
Personally for me, I would do my best to not use gender terms to non-binary people, but most people say it with the least hostility and probably wouldn't even recognize the hurt it would put on the individual.
Yeah seriously, I agree. "Boys" feels pretty exclusionary to me.
And for people asking what to use instead... Come on, it's not that hard. Most people in real life don't use "boys" as a general term, I've only ever heard it in gaming circles. Some options are "you all", "everyone", "people", "folks", etc. Varies a little bit by context. But if you're a fluent English speaker, I trust you can figure something out that sounds good while being neutral.
And for people asking what to use instead... Come on, it's not that hard. Most people in real life don't use "boys" as a general term, I've only ever heard it in gaming circles. Some options are "you all", "everyone", "people", "folks", etc. Varies a little bit by context. But if you're a fluent English speaker, I trust you can figure something out that sounds good while being neutral.
It really shouldn't be that hard to use different terms. And your first response to being called out for using terminology that makes people uncomfortable shouldn't be to try to justify their use or flip responsibility for finding an alternative onto the OP. That just makes it harder for people to want to speak out when something's wrong.
Thinking on it, though I talk a bit differently than most, I mainly use "everyone," then "guys," and then "y'all". I've always liked "everyone," but almost no one else uses it. Guys is easier to say and works better in some contexts, and my dad was from Texas, so I picked up, "y'all".
I feel like boys must be some regional thing since I've almost never heard it used to refer to a group of people in casual conversation, only meme type things. I also think as a male who identifies as male I wouldn't be comfortable with someone using boys only since it sounds weird outside of a joking context or talking about a group of gendered children.
I feel like boys must be some regional thing since I've almost never heard it used to refer to a group of people in casual conversation, only meme type things. I also think as a male who identifies as male I wouldn't be comfortable with someone using boys only since it sounds weird outside of a joking context or talking about a group of gendered children.
I make my own decisions for my own actions. I'm certainly not going to blindly do every single request that random strangers tell me. I'll consider it and then decide for myself
I used the word "gay" growing up in the 80s and 90s like every other kid back then. But I chose on my own to phase that word out of my vocabulary probably 10-15 years ago.
I see absolutely no reason to do the same with "you guys" or "dude"
please don't ever ever say this to someone who is telling you that they feel hurt by microagressions
I don't think I have ever used the term "boys" when there are multiple genders involved, I have definitely used the word "guys", but I see that as a gender neutral term. I work with mostly women and they've used the term "guys" many times when referring to the whole group. I have tried to cut down on it though as I don't really know if someone doesn't like the term or not.
I'll fight to the death protecting 'bruh'. A well timed bruh is comedy gold.
The more I think about it the more I feel like this is forum/internet problem.
If I'm playing with a female I never say boys lol
If I'm playing with a female I never say boys lol
Lots of dudes in Overwatch do this. "GG boys." or stuff like that. While I don't do that necesarily I still do say stuff every now and then use "guys" in place of everyone. I never thought of how hurtful it could be to people though. As mentioned, I should stick to alternatives like "ya'll" and the like.
I don't know where you think this discussion will lead, considering you don't seem to want one. You just repeat this same thing at everyone that disagrees with you.
Just because something gets reinforced across gender lines doesn't make it somehow fine. But I do understand it's not maliciously being used to reinforced male as the dominant gender in 99.9% of situations (Though that reinforcement is how it ended up as a default pronoun).
I don't think there's anything odd about "Hey, everyone/people/folks" in casual conversation. And while I don't use "y'all" people use that all the time too. If you don't want to use something different, that's your prerogative, but we aren't chained to the word "guys". We could always pick something else.
I try to say "folks" or "boys & girls" as much as I can buy I sometimes say "boys" due to habit of most of my gaming friends being male.
The OP does not explain this and you're going to have a hard time generating any sort of worthwhile conversation here if you just keep pointing people towards your original post when they may not agree with you
"Guys" has been widely used as a gender neutral term for a long time at this point. Most people don't even notice it.
Someone trying to get the attention of a group of people by saying "hey guys" is pretty common, no matter who the group is comprised of. "Hey boys" isn't.
Language is weird/
OP
OP
The entire OP explains this, it literally spells out why this "bothers me".
Try reading it again.
I join a group of male friend: Hey Guys
I join a group of female friends : Hey Girls
I join my gay uncles group at a party : Hey girls / Hey guys (whatever is the mood)
I go see a Trans friend when doing a show with others : Hey Girls
I go see said friend while he's in tshirt and jeans in his home: Hey man
I cannot even imagine using boys. Boys seems to be used to small children to me. Even when i talk to my nephews, i call out guys. I used to teach kids from 6y old to 16 and I never used boys. Like many said, using boys is weird
In the end its all about knowing who you are talking too.
I join a group of female friends : Hey Girls
I join my gay uncles group at a party : Hey girls / Hey guys (whatever is the mood)
I go see a Trans friend when doing a show with others : Hey Girls
I go see said friend while he's in tshirt and jeans in his home: Hey man
I cannot even imagine using boys. Boys seems to be used to small children to me. Even when i talk to my nephews, i call out guys. I used to teach kids from 6y old to 16 and I never used boys. Like many said, using boys is weird
In the end its all about knowing who you are talking too.
wow so cool to do this to a non-binary person
anyway y'all for life
EDIT I used to use "guys" and "dude" in a way I thought was more non-gendered but I've been using it less and less