Bags of Money
Bags of Money, or Tobias Boyland, is a derailed tree-swinger who, after being released from prison on a 14 year drug sentence, decided it would be a sterling idea to try to amend himself into an outstanding businessman while at the same time claiming to be a hardcore gangster despite abiding in the whitey cesspool of Buffalo, NY. His main claim to fame is authoring a self help book that reads like an orthodox MySpace profile mixed with one of those get rich quick infomercials they air in the middle of the night. If that alone was not bad enough, after the book was published, he ran a large promotion campaign both IRL and OTI. His success can be demonstrated by the book becoming an alleged massive hit, so much so that it has not yet been classified as "out of print" on Amazon (only three copies left!).
Contents
THUG MOTIVATION[edit]
Few words can be said to accurately depict the modern literary chef d'oeuvre known as THUG MOTIVATION. Published by Bags in 2007, it is an unabbreviated 120 pages split into 60 informative chapters (that's two pages a chapter) such as "CHECK YO BITCH", "EVERYDAY HUSTLIN", as well as "CUT OFF A CHICKEN HEAD". The entire book was quite incontestably made to serve no real purpose, other than to stroke Bags' ego for the fact that he, unlike his ancestors, was fortuitously able to afford a mediocre home in a humdrum suburban neighborhood. Because of this and a wide range of other matters that tend to get to his head, Bags sees himself as some kind of high class entrepreneur (if not an omnipotent deity), and credits entities like his ghetto entourage to his "success" rather than accepting the actuality that he liberally throws money around to anyone willing to "model" for filler content in his writing. It should also be noted that he did not learn to read till he was in prison, and was taught by the department of corrections (no srsly).
Selected Passages[edit]
The e-book (Sort of)[edit]
BagsofmoneyTV has uploaded a slew of videos that give off the impression they relate to his book. In all actuality, they are no more than further ego stroking on his part. For instance, a video titled "THUG MOTIVATION CHAPTER 1" would lead anyone to assume it was somehow tied in with the first chapter of his book, right? Wrong. It is no more than a collection of Bags of Money magazine spots and memorabilia (it should be noted that he had it made) played over a radio interview he did shorty after his release from prison/release of the book.
Lamentably, some tasteless honkeys were confused as to what his core message was, and Bags was forced to explain his big bad self.
Lol v& again[edit]
Over the years, Bags slowly moved out of the real estate market, and into the debt collection business. His "agency" was founded with a handful of other criminals on the grounds that it would be a totally good idea to impersonate police officers and other federal officials in order to solicit debt money from random families. Anyone with two brain cells would at once comprehend that this is highly illegal, regrettably, Bags isn't one to learn from his previous experiences. All nine agencies he owned were outed by Chris Hansen in a Dateline investigation about people getting threats from "police officers" over credit card debt[1]. Over a span of two days, Chris had uncovered that jailbirds from around the New York area were hired to pose as cops, lawyers, and even judges to scare people into paying up. During the night of Bags' arrest, he was reported to have been armed with an AK-47 while the feds broke in. gg.
| —Anonymous commenter on his YouTube channel | ||
External Links[edit]
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Bags of Money is part of a series on YouTube. |
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