Uncharted
Uncharted is an overrated game series developed by Naughty Dog and published by Sony. A series often praised by Plebstation fanboys, and prejudiced gaming websites alike.
Uncharted is an unoriginal third-person cover shooter that rips off its story from Indiana Jones and gameplay from Gears of War, Tomb Raider and Prince of Persia. Uncharted follows Nathan Drake who goes on treasure hunting adventures and immigration massacres in order to find some shitty cache. The series manages to rehash itself over and over including story and gameplay and forces players to sit through mediocre shooting and boring puzzle sections.
| — - Greg Miller in his IGN review of Uncharted 3 | ||
Contents
The Games[edit]
Uncharted: Drake's Fortune[edit]
The game that started it all. The story follows the heroic journey of protagonist Nathan Drake, as he searches for the lost treasure with the help of journalist Elena Fisher and some other shitty character Victor Sullivan.
Despite being extremely mediocre at best, the game managed to receive critical acclaim and received game of the year awards which in turn encouraged Sony to create sequels that were exactly the same game as this one. Since it was one of the few Playstation 3 games that existed at the time, it won PS3 Game of the Year since there were no other competitors.
Uncharted 2: Among Thieves[edit]
The exact same game as the first except with a new Australian sidekick named Chloe and a britfag named Harry who later betrays Nate. The crew find yet another lost treasure since Sony was running out of already uninspired story ideas, this time in snow with special snow effects that will make you BAWWWW with amazement.
The game had added multiplayer which nobody honestly wanted or soon cared about and also added a co-op which was tacked on and pointless. The game also added stealth which added nothing awesome to the already stale and repetitive gameplay.
Despite being incredibly boring, the game somehow managed to win moar Game of the Year awards even earning a 21/20 from a Playstation magazine in France. It seems that ripping off multiple games and movies now qualifies for being named a "masterpiece".
Uncharted 3: Drake's Deception[edit]
Another rehash of the first two games. This game somehow managed to be the worst and most overrated of the series. Another British sidekick is introduced named Charlie who doesn't manage to betray Nate this time, all he does is contribute nothing to the plot while being a whining pussy.
What new features you ask? Well you can now throw back grenades and it has amazing new sand effects and that's it! To be fair to Uncharted 2, at least it added two new game mode while this one does fuck all. Once again, this game received Game of the Year awards despite being the biggest pile of shit in video game existence, not just on the game itself but what it represented as a whole. Uncharted 3 gaining awards means that from that game forward, developers were able to get away with making half-assed games based on hype alone while receiving undeserved praise. Forget Call of Duty, this was the game that battered the industry into making stupid, movie-like, hand-holding piles of dog turd. A Game of the Year award edition was released with a free Terminator Salvation movie download that proved Sony was making video games for the art and wasn't in the industry just for the cash.
What happens when you give Uncharted 3 any score lower than a 9
Uncharted: Golden Abyss[edit]
A PS Vita version of its console counterparts. The gameplay was dumbed down for handhelds which ultimately meant a dismal portable game from a stale series. Nothing new was added to the game. The game also had a treasure map DLC which meant that players were given the option of being shown the collectable treasures instead of having to find them, that's right folks, you have to pay to win in this Uncharted game. Of course, the series was out of ideas at this point but for some unexplained reason, they decided to continue. Naughty Dog also thought it was funny to leave a motion capture prank if the player got through the game on "Crushing Mode".
Uncharted 4: A Thief's End[edit]Since the Indiestation 3.5 only had *ahem* indie games, it needed some half-assed AAA titles to fill its abysmal libary. What better way to do that than to milk the ever living shit out of a series that should have really stopped at the second installment. Naughty Dog stated that "It was Nate's greatest adventure yet" which lead Playstation fanboys to hype the ever living hell out of the game which hadn't been released yet.
After it was released it was received with high praise for every single outlet that Naughty Dog could buy off. But they forgot Washington Post, so when they gave it an actual review, whiny fanboys actually called for Metacritic to Got the Thief part right[edit]Staying true to the name, Naughty Dog decided to DeviantArt art from a successful game studio, that actually makes good games, and put it in their fucking trailer. Once ND were caught ripping shit off (as usual.) they barely redesigned the painting to the point that they used the same picture but added different mountains this time.  As the keen-eyed autistic crowd might realize this is concept art from Assassin's Creed Black Flag. Open it in Photoshop, use clone tool and crop, and you got yourself a brand spanking new painting. Game design the naughty dog way.  Really original guys Characters[edit]Nathan Drake: A white supremacist who spends his life going on massacres of those who don't live in America or have the same color skin or accent as him. His mother committed suicide when he was five. Elena Fisher: A journalist who like Drake, goes slaughtering hundreds of innocent Russians. While looking extremely sexy, she still doesn't know when to keep her fucking mouth shut. She also gets ditched by Nathan and Sully in the first game. Victor Sullivan: Yet again another murdering shithead. While Sully is about at least 100 years old, he is still able to climb, jump and shoot like just like Drake. Chloe Frazer: Some slutty chick who Drake hangs out with in the second game before Elena cums and steals his heart. She's an Australian who is surprisingly never drunk. Ever. She still is an arrogant cunt though. Charlie Cutter: British and also a Jason Statham lookalike. Charlie is also claustrophobic and cries like a bitch whenever he goes near a small gap in a wall. This shit for brains gives up Drake's journal to the "bad" guys and otherwise does nothing to help inflate Drake's giant ego. Difference Between Games[edit]What you see below are three separate games, or are they? Try your best to figure out which game is which.
 Gallery[edit]See Also[edit]
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