Pit Viper
| — Pit_Viper, as User:FuckYou2 |
Pit_Viper (aka Shit_Viper) is yet another disgusting, arrogant closet-pedophile of a dollfucking plushie allied with casperghostboy and midiman. He has declared war on Something Awful and for that matter the whole of the internets that doesn't fuck dolls. He has earned the nickname Shit_Viper due to having a greater obsession with scat and buttsecks than Howard Stern and Kirk Johnson combined, which makes people wonder exactly what sort of condition his dolls are really in.
He also may have been the creep who tested fuckdolls on behalf of Hockey, and related all of the horrific details to Dave so that he could post believable and coherent reviews. Of course, they deny this vehemently. This in spite of the fact that many of Shit_Viper's posts revolve around rating dolls for their fuckability.
As it so happens, Shit_Viper has an ED account. Show your appreciation of his contribution to the internets!
Contents
The Challenger Appears...[edit]
A longtime dollfucker and poster on The Doll Forum, Shit_Viper's friendship with David Hockey earned him admin status on Hockey's Doll Chronicles site. Hockey needed someone with some semblance of balls to help him stand up to the onslaught of the Goons, and since Shit_Viper was perfectly willing to use swear words (unlike the majority of others on the site) the choice was easily made.
Shit_Viper gained some moar respect from Hockey by seemingly finding the source of SA's evil. We all know "somethingaweful.com" and DigiPawn are to blame, amiright?
About the time Hockey finally broke down, Shit_Viper decided to bare his fangs. This amounted to him making tons of poopy-jokes and claiming that he had, in fact, ejaculated in a real vagina. All else he could do amounted to exemplifying Godwin's Law and bringing up William Freund.
Prior to Dave losing what was left of his mind due to Goons and his mom's death, Shit_Viper's contributions to Dave's threads amounted to wank material featuring Snuggles the Bear and RealDoll getting it on, making Shit_Viper a fan of beastiality in a way.
Typical Shit_Viper shitposts:
| — Shit_Viper.Turds go UP butt?! | ||
| — Shit_Viper. Wants an asshat of his own. | ||
The Shit_Viper Rampant[edit]
Pointing out that he loves scat just infuriated Shit_Viper even further. Coming to believe that Hockey was weak, Shit_Viper decided to take control of Hockey's forum from him as best he could. Although Hockey told Shit_Viper to stand down and stop feeding the trolls, Shit_Viper would not relent. Hockey's fate is at present uncertain, but he was warned. Witness this exchange (BALEETED... well, just moved to the admin section of The Doll Forum):
| — A dollfucker named Debra. | ||
| — Shit_Viper. Internet Tough Guy, at large. | ||
| — Debra. Not getting it. | ||
| — SA Goon Caligasti | ||
The last 3 sentences above have been usurped by Shit_Viper and have become his forum sig, as a warning to all other dollfuckers who question his authority.
| — Kevin Havens. Keep on spergin. | ||
It may well be that Shit_Viper has dispensed with Hockey, as it has seemingly been a few days since last Dave posted. He may well have teamed up with psychotic aspie Kevin Havens to get rid of the body, and Hockey's various accounts taken over by the last people he thought would betray him.
The new, self-proclaimed leader of the dollfuckers is not as tough as he'd have others believe, however. He loves bunnies, for instance.
Where in the World is Wabbit?[edit]
Just as David Hockey took his love Bianca around the country in an epic quest to get her a pussy, Shit_Viper had his plush bunny photographed in various locations for... no particular reason at all. Not even for the lulz. He says it was one of his dolls' idea. Srsly. So he mailed the bunny to various other dollfuckers throughout the globe, photographing "Bunny Wunny" with their dolls and sending him the pics. As you can already guess, some of these got risque to say the least. Fuck it. These perverts shoved a rabbit up their dolls' pussies, and not the vibrating kind. Thankfully not a real rabbit either, but the whole thing is fucked-up regardless. Too bad nobody decided to send "Bunny Wunny" to Galen and put a harsh stop to that shit. Unless that's why the bunny has gone missing for the last few weeks.
For that matter, he even set up a whole site dedicated to the circlejerk: Down the rabbit hole...
He worries about Bunny running into Snuggles the doll-raping Bear for some odd reason. Perhaps Shit_Viper would fap himself to death at the prospect of plush-on-plush action of any sort. The man is clearly a deviant, as can be proven by the fact he has a Lolly doll.
Lolly Lolly Lolly Lolly, stick yo dick inside yo dolly...[edit]
This is Lolly...
... and this is Lisa.
Moar action for teh bunneh.
Sorry. My mind just broke. Caption pending.
The dolls with their other assailant.
Dollpr0n for you.
This is what Shit_Viper faps to...
... dolls eating each other out.
Sometimes Lolly goes blonde.
Lolly is a Goatse Girl?
Yes, Shit_Viper has a doll made to resemble a 12-year-old. With oversized tits. Confused? He's not. He knows what he likes and he likes 'em young. Are you still a pedophile if it's just a doll that looks too young? Anyway, he likes to take pictures of Lolly going down on his Teddybabe "Lisa", too. He goes out of the way to dress her up all whorish like JonBenet Ramsey and to parade her around in a bunny costume, further indulging his obscene beastiality fetish and combining it with his appalling lust for prostatots.
He has done suspiciously postive reviews for both dolls. The one for Lisa can be read here, and his review for Lolly can be read here. Such poetry...
| — Shit_Viper. | ||
| — Shit_Viper. Sold? | ||
He bought Lolly from e-bay, too. That means she may well have been "used", as in not a "virgin". Look real closely at Lolly while you're at it. Doesn't "she" somewhat resemble a youthful Tubgirl?
Shit_Viper spends whatever time he has on the forums giving product reviews and recommendations to other dollfuckers, and it seems he has sampled every fake pussy there is (surely even traps and femskins). That is, whatever time he has remaining after bitching about Goons and fapping to doll pr0n.
Some of Shit-Viper's and Hockey's Anti-Goon Propaganda[edit]
- "How far is going TOO far?"
- "Howard Stern, Dollfucker?"
- "Durr... I found the head Goon!"
- "Goons are evil! They kill people! Pray to God and buy a gun!"
The Shit_Viper Revealed[edit]
Recently Shit_Viper and David Hockey activated their Wonder Twin Powers and made complete faggots of themselves on Something Awful. It is believed that they tag-teamed on the goonobyl account in an attempt to mindfuck the Goons. It just incited a couple of Goons to internet detective the ever-living shit out of Shit_Viper, coming up with tons of places to troll him. From the information Shit_Viper's IRL pics, name, birthdate, where he works and for whom, family... well, everything shy of his Social Security number was found. No lie. Quite a bit is found, actually.
He's a Simpsons fanboi (see here), and listed Lisa as his favorite. Recall that he named his plush Teddy Babe fuckdoll "Lisa". It's enough that he has a doll outright named Lolly, but knowing the reason behind the other doll's name just makes the creepiness incalculable.
Appropriately, his avatar is the annoying little fat-fuck troll Cartman from South Park.
He considers himself to be one sly bald guy, and thinks highly enough of himself to cosplay as Emperor Palpatine. Witness. BALEETED. This link no longer exisits, however you can still find the pictures in this SA post
He's an astronomy buff and runs a website and trolls forums dedicated to it (Moonport and Bressler). He isn't much of a webmaster, if his posts at Histony are indicative of anything.
Other information can be found on the SA thread, particularly this post.
Not surprisingly, Shit_Viper had tried to blank this very page numerous times. Obviously, he failed.
Soon after, Shit_Viper posted a YouTube video laughing about how he fucked with SA. He then promptly deleted it, realizing that no matter what he had, in fact, been pwnt when he wasn't looking.
He can try all he wants to try and erase his face from the internet, but it will fail. Witness these links.
He tried damage control by doing an interview with Hockey, basically saying The Simpsons turned him into a dollfucker. It can be read here.
His shame knows no bounds, for he recently admitted that his ex-wife had left him for a hillbilly pedophile. And he admitted this while on Something Awful.
He has also created fake magazine covers and trying to use them as image macros aginst SA. Witness how clever he is through his dolly album.
He likes to commit plagiarism and yet complains that everybody rips him off. Examples are found in this Coverdoll article of his. He blatantly steals entire verbatim statements from three different articles, and then has the nerve to claim copyright. He gets called on it at BoASucks as well as on SomethingAwful.
On June 2008, he tossed the RSSD in the dumpster and sold his Teddy Babe to a (non sex) doll collector. Guess it's back to handjobs.
As of May 2010, he no longer sucks midiman's cock, and has even joined the Kevin Havens hatetrain here after Beetface hit his disabled girlfriend one too many times and got kicked out.
Check the links below for moar.
Links[edit]
View Shit_Viper's Doll Forum shitposts.Witness his Gallery of Terror.Bunny Wunny's trip through Hell. Check it out!.What used to be David Hockey's site.- The second SA dollfucker thread. It's done. Onwards to the next.
The third dollfucker thread on SA</b>. Done. The story never ends. Onto the next.- <b>
The forth chapter of a now homeless dollfucker Ongoing</stirke> - <strike>GADFLY: Goons Against Doll-Fucking, - Dead site. A MySpace group dedicated to trolling dollfuckers.
Shit_Viper gets called out on BoASucks!
<b>Newly Discovered[edit]
"Waaahhh! Mah website been stolen!""Turn towards the doll side. It is your destiny.""ZOOOM! I makes rockitshipz!""They have the best in diversity"... really.
See Also[edit]
- Pit_Viper's ED User Page!-Give him a nice warm welcome!
- David Hockey
- Kevin Havens
- Statuephilia
- Plushie
- Internet troll personality disorder
- Something Awful
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