The Troll Hunter
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| —The Troll Hunter’s opening statement. | ||
The Troll Hunter (pronounced ‘Trrrrroooohll Hunter’!!), also known as TheHunterOfTrolls, is a mysterious masked vigilante who appeared out of nowhere on the Jewtubes during the month of November, in The Year of Our Lord, 2010.
With his eccentric appearance, upper class English accent and love of rolling his R's, he instantly struck all who beheld him as a puzzling character.
Proclaiming his hero to be infamous autistic Internet punching bag, Christian Weston Chandler, the Troll Hunter declared open season on all trolls and cyberbullies across every corner of the Internet, vowing to confront all of them IRL and, with the help of his deformed, hunchbacked manservant, Limburg, bring them to justice, thus creating a friendlier, happier Internet that he has dubbed 'The Hopequeduct'.
Motives[edit]
As should be immediately obvious to everyone who isn't afflicted with a crippling case of Asperger's syndrome, the so-called Troll Hunter is, in fact, a troll himself. A cannibal troll, to be precise.
The Troll Hunter channels Gaston.
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At the time of the Troll Hunter’s emergence, CWC trolling was entering something of a drought. Smarting from numerous fake girlfriends, fake job offers from Nintendo, and impostors and copycats seeking to steal his e-fame, Chris-chan had sworn off of the Internet on the advice of his church counsellor, Rocky, in favor of an attempt at socialisation in the real world.
As such, there had been precious little activity by the original creator of Sonichu and Rosechu on the Internet and, indeed, many believed that the chronicles of Chris-chan were at an end.
It is believed that the Troll Hunter, despite claiming to be a champion of those victimised by trolls and an admirer of Chris-chan, was in fact lying and, in reality, was merely trying in vain to attract the attentions of a long-dormant manchild with his theatrical shenanigans and love of old showtunes in the hopes of providing new content to the legions of slavering, self-loathing aspies who follow Chris-chan in the hopes of finding someone more pathetic than themselves to jeer at.
Indeed, Chris-chan has yet to respond to any of the Troll Hunter’s missives as, through Pavlovian conditioning enacted through years of trolling sagas, he has become rightly paranoid about people on the Internet. Indeed, it would seem that Chris-chan believes there is something suspicious about a masked stranger in clothing of an antiquated style suddenly appearing and declaring that he intends to fix all of the problems in his life.
Nevertheless, the Troll Hunter’s antics cannot be discounted as complete shit, as he has provided a shining beacon to which several other previously undiscovered, intensely naive lolcows have been drawn to like moths to a flame. Or, if you prefer, autists to an anime convention.
Because, yes, there are apparently, people who watched his videos and, unable to pick up on the less than subtle hint of the ridiculous underlining the whole thing, took everything he said and did 100% seriously.
Who Was That Masked Man?[edit]
Always in disguise, his features hidden behind a Venetian mask and tricorne hat, the true identity of the Troll Hunter is yet to be revealed. There are, however, some likely suspects.
The list is as follows...
- Harry Partridge - A popular theory, despite being an EXTREMELY unlikely one. Partridge has explicitly stated on numerous occasions that he is not the Troll Hunter and, furthermore, that he actually prefers the insanity Chris-chan creates by himself when left alone, caring little for the content provided by the prodding of trolls.[1]
- Linkara
- Ray Comfort
- Brian Peppers
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TV's Brad Pitt- Confirmed as untrue. TV's Brad Pitt has stated that he is not, nor has ever been in any way associated with the Troll Hunter and a leaked picture of TV's Brad Pitt shows him as being morbidly obese with a neckbeard, whereas the Troll Hunter is cleanshaven and, while a little bit chubby, is quite spry by comparison. - This faggot
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This sperglord- e199sigma denies he is the Troll Hunter. - Hitler
- Your mom
From what little we know about the Troll Hunter, it is apparant that he is a caucasian male, 25 years of age, based in or around Ohio.
External Links[edit]
See Also[edit]
- Chris-chan
- The Unknown Autobot
- Trolling
- White Knighting
- Cyber Police
- Trying Too Hard
- Cosplay
- Anthony 'A-Log' LoGatto
- Ickeriss69
- Legi0n
- Trolls trolling trolls
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The Troll Hunter is part of a series on YouTube. |
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