Adele
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Adele Laurie Blue Cheese Adkins, better known simply as Adele is an oversized fat landwhale JUST like Girlvinyl, except that she sings and it sounds like shit.
Originally from Britfaggistan, she first came to prominence after horse-faced pro-ana Jewess, Amy Whorehouse pwned herself with drugs, allowing her considerable bulk to fill the void in the public's lives for dreary, droaning soul ballads (sans soul), the blatant vibe that this lardass is clearly projecting her dissatisfaction with life. Apparently, she recieved her first recording contract after a friend of hers posted a demo on MySpace in 2006, but as anybody who has even a cursory idea as to how the music industry works will tell you, this is an obvious lie cultivated by her record company to make her seem down-to-earth. It also implies that she has friends, as this, according to their market research, is something that the general public find popular.
Greed[edit]
Merely by looking at Adele's bloated, walrus-like carcass, either on stage or in one of her music videos, it should become readily apparent that she's a greedy bitch. However, it would appear that, much like a certain other fatty, Adele's greed is not just for cheezburgers.
In an interview with Q magazine, Adele let her true colours show.
| —The multi-platinum selling millionairess Adele on her money problems. Oh, but our hearts bleed for you, dear. | ||
Songs[edit]
All of Adele's songs are as follows
Rolling in the deep: You left me, you're going to regret it, and I'm better than you.
Someone like you: You left me,you're going to regret it, and I'm better than you. with sad passive-aggressive undertones.
Rumor has it: You left me, you're going to regret it, and I'm better than you.
Trolling In The Deep[edit]
Last Thursday news spreaded that Adele had not aborted her baby and instead decided to give birth to yet another glob of useless lard on a Friday. Shit leaked out via Twitter and like sharks to blood in open water then came the interbutt trolls. They all congratulated Adele by giving a nice warm welcome to the glob and gave her advice on how to prepare it for life as the new fuglier Susan Boyle. She took the nice warm congrats very srsly... Then bawww'd to the Internet Police before auctioning her 'misery' to commercial media outlets.
| —Venessa Bieber proving what lovely people Beliebers are. | ||
Previous Quote | Next Quote
Gallery[edit]
Adele's many thanks to all her fans out there after the trollin incident. She's as fat as always.
Gaga responding to one of Adele's many thanks
An unfunny meme about her
External links[edit]
See also[edit]
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Adele is part of a series on Visit the Music Portal for complete coverage. |
