Blazesonic
|
KEEP IT SIMPLE, STUPID! This article is TL;DR. You can help by editing this page and removing the large blocks of boring text. |
|
DevianTARTlets usually don't have an ounce of originality in them. Most of them are content pretending to be their make-believe Sonic the Hedgehog recolor and leave it at that. But no Deviantartist has ever sunk to the levels Blazesonic (aka Sonic2007 aka Rebirth08) does. His drawings are abominations, sins against every God and Goddess that anyone might believe in. Even though most Tartlets aren't original or talented in the slightest, none of them would dare put together something this horrible. Combining every internet game or cartoon fandom in existence into one giant clusterfuck of fail, Blazesonic is the creator of a fan-comic abomination which he calls Sonic Hearts - The Hidden Memories, along with his friend jedimickey (who probably deserves an article too).
Contents
- 1 About this Faggotry
- 2 The Second Coming of Anonymous
- 3 Quotes
- 4 IDOLS!
- 5 A NEW CHALLENGER APPEARS - DAVIDGAZO
- 6 Moar of this Recent Faggotry
- 7 Sonic Hearts: How To Rape a Fandom
- 8 Sonic Universe Failures
- 9 The Rebirth (and Fall) of Blazesonic (Again)
- 10 Sonic Hearts: How Sonic and all of his fandom assrapists are gonna TOTALLY GONNA PWN ANON DUDE FUCK YEA
- 11 RUN FOR THE HILLS!
- 12 The (expected)Return (and retreat)of Blazesonic
- 13 [-+]The Erotic Fanfic
- 14 Other Retards with Sonic Recolors
- 15 External Links
About this Faggotry[edit]
His fursona is a blue sonichu, wearing the animu faggot Sora's costume from Kingdom Hearts named Sonic Thorndyke. Now, normally shoddy drawn unoriginal art is expected from little kids, but the fact of the matter is Blazesonic is 19 years old(though he could be lying about his age). In his short lived, and completely original comic, Sonic Thorndyke and the Power Puff Girls (and Dexter since he's obviously trying to rip off Bleedman's shitty comic) do battle against an evil organization once again consisting of every villain that's been on Saturday morning cartoons (and Cell for some reason). Later on, the retarded characters made sense (yes, even Cell), when internet saw a striking similarity in an equally retarded, but better drawn comic. He only got a few pages into it before ebaumsworld got fed up and trolled the fuck out of him. They even managed to phish his password from him (using passwords like "sonic" and "sonicblaze", he shouldn't be surprised). Blaze was so crushed by the raid, he quit the internet forever. But like most tartlets, he didn't keep his promise.
On August 19th, after Anonymous fucked over his original account, he returned to devianTART under the name Sonic2007, renaming his comic to Sonic Universe Heroes. His art had featured no improvement (except for the fact he's using photoshop instead of a pencil and MS Paint), and he was still as big an unoriginal fuckwit as ever. The story is now about an eeeeeeevil villain who's destroying worlds for no reason. Three heroes from Disneyville, Megaville, and Original-Character-Fucktardsville come together forming TEAM HERO to battle the evil darkness villains who have eaten their planets. In other words, a direct rip-off of the already unoriginal shitty story lines featured in both Kingdom Hearts games. He also has stolen characters from his dream date Bleedman, who ALSO steals characters from various cartoons.
After only being back for a day, and getting a mere four negative comments, Blazesonic took down all of his pictures, comics, and journals. The next day he put them back up, claiming he wasn't going to be moved by "snobby Legions" and "computer geeks". He was unable to keep that promise.
The Second Coming of Anonymous[edit]
A few days after his return, somewhere around 2AM GMT, Anonymous was once again sick of Blazesonic's shit. His newest comics had been posted in /v/ and /co/, it was time to unleash the combined force of /v/irgins and /co/mrades, and make their /b/rothers proud. Within one hour, Blazesonic had taken all of his work down again, and it wasn't just him that was attacked, no. The Legion attacked his friends, "hacking" into their account and causing a mass hissyfit. But was Anonymous done? Oh no, far from it. nimp.org links were posted in journals, false explanations were given, confusion and deceit ran rampant, and it was most wonderful. The beauty of this raid was that none of them had any idea at all who we were, or where we came from. They referred to us as a single person, named "Legion".
In some form of tribute, one of them wrote a poem to us, trying to get us to leave them alone if they leave us alone. As nice an offer as this was, we took the poem, as copypasted below, and resumed full bombardment. Blazesonic once again promised to leave the internet forever. But he'll be back. The TARTlets always come back. And Anonymous must be ready to stop him when he does.
The Poem[edit]
As written by GinKyofu13 as some form of peace offering. Needless to say we took it and continued our crusade anyway.
| — GinKyofu, attempting to pacify the Internet Hate Machine | ||
Quotes[edit]
Blazesonic just wants to be with his friends![edit]
The first time Blazesonic was trolled off the interwebs, almost a year ago, he made this lulzworthy entry in his Sheezyart journal.
| —Blazesonic, on the importance of making new friends. | ||
Previous Quote | Next Quote
We are Anonymous! means LOSER![edit]
| —Blazesonic, on giving up to computer geeks. | ||
Previous Quote | Next Quote
Blazesonic fucking snaps[edit]
| —Blazesonic succumbs to anonymous. | ||
Previous Quote | Next Quote
A Word From His Friend[edit]
| —jedimickey, on Blazesonic | ||
IDOLS![edit]
The artist, Bleedman, is Blazesonic's idol. His dream is for his comic to gain his approval and meet him, in person, so he can suck his tiny chiny chubby. This will of course never happen, as even Bleedman would be appalled by Blazesonic's work. Still, he pursues his fool dream... until ebaumsworld trolls him off the internet again, hopefully for good this time.
A NEW CHALLENGER APPEARS - DAVIDGAZO[edit]
This relatively new whiny shit actually tried to bring back Blazesonic's (now Sonic 2007 lol) fandom rape character. Worse thing is, when some random tartlet commented on it and didn't say it was the BEST THING EVAR, as the fucktard had hoped, he got a comment that WASN'T EVEN OFFENSIVE but obviously warranted davidgazo to go batshit insane (sound familiar?):
Original comment found here; it's hidden durrr
Non-offensive tartlet comment:
'God, why was this character resurrected? Anyways, I'm surprised you didn't get more creative with the Digivolution background. btw, what the hell is a Warpisonimon? Just wondering.'
Funny, ain't it? Sad thing is, he was serious. Obviously your gallery has to be super kewl to even think of stepping up to this guy. Also, Warpisonimon is serious shit. Oh yea, proper English is sooooo overrated. This poor sack of shit obviously needs a good trolling. So hop to it!
REMEMBER TO SCREENCAP PLZKTHX, because he hides comments at the blink of an eye
Moar of this Recent Faggotry[edit]
Oops, forgot to screencap moar.
This is obviously a masterpiece worthy of asspatting.
"Snafu is not even thought of when I draw anymore."
Sonic Hearts: How To Rape a Fandom[edit]
Sonic Universe Failures[edit]
Cover art failure. What the fuck are those polka dot things?
Those universes look shopped. I can tell by some of the pixels.
Talk about ripping off SEGA entirely.
Look, shithead, 'savvy' isn't a random fucking word. It's basically the same as "Comprende?" or "Capisce?" LEARN THE LANGUAGE, FAGGOT.
Does Bleedman know about this?
STOP HAMMER TIME
A BAD THING
I'm just speechless
The Rebirth (and Fall) of Blazesonic (Again)[edit]
In early 2008, Blazesonic resurrected his Sonic2007 account to resume crapflooding MOAR characters into the fail-blender that is Blazesonic's brain. Only this year, that bitch is set to overdrive. He hasn't learned his damn lesson yet. Sadly, he's still trying to best Bleedman's internet success (lol). He's also still trying to involve Anonymous in his updated shitfest, because the Anonymous in his story does so totally not mirror his butthurt due to pwnage by Anonymous in the past.
Again, Blazesonic failed to realize that expressing his creativity, producing shitty fanfics of every character he fapped to, and showing anonymous he can make a successful web comic is huge waste of his life. Then, a day after his second rebirth, he abandoned his account again! Only to return a third time exactly one day later under the name Rebirth08.. a club meant to show Anonymous that not everyone is afraid of their internet hate machine. Sound familiar? He halted production of Sonic Universe Heroes hoping that, in exchange, his harassers would call the entire thing off and stop bothering him. Wait-- isn't that just being a fucking coward? Ten days after saying he was going to GTFO of the interwebs, he started posting his shit again, under a revised title (again), now called "Sonic Universe Heroes & The Time Traveling Maiden".
The mods ban people left to right, thinking every negative commenter is ANONYMOUS OUT TO GET HIM!! They have taken to spending their time protecting this kid's poor e-feelings, rather than doing productive things.. like answering the ban inquiries of the people who didn't have anything to do with 4chan, just to make an effort of stopping a single troll.
Sonic Hearts: How Sonic and all of his fandom assrapists are gonna TOTALLY GONNA PWN ANON DUDE FUCK YEA[edit]
As of the moment, he's got 2 supporters(Oh boy, so many!) :
- ginkyofu13: Does not know proper use of grammar, and spells simple words incorrectly. Example: "your welcome!"
- Pendragon9: A fence-sitter.
Go visit them!
GTFO and STAY OUT PLZKTHX
Hump4us, DO IT FAGGOT
Baked cookies are in order for this guy.
This guy too.
Nothing has changed.
He must really suck at art if he can't draw better than this clown.
Blocking users is the ultimate solution.
Moot: Manlady dictator of anonymous.
Rebirth08 trying to befriend DivineAngel. He must be attracted to her level of fail. Part 1 of 2
Part 2 of 2
GIN WUV BIG WORDS!
Netwarrior's response to what Gin said.
"THank you for the grammer update but i sometimes smart."
RUN FOR THE HILLS![edit]
Heroic troll (and egotist faggot) MoarLurk (Alias Supdawg43), while returning from a six-week internet break, discovered that, to his pleasure, Rebirth08 had been banned (JOYOUS DAY INDEED). Knowing that fail cannot be banned, he took it upon himself to seek out the new form Blazesonic had taken.
It took him several days of e-stalking to locate the fifth form of Blazesonic, now known as His-World1225 (LOL SONIC). The final tip came when Blazesonic went to inform the lulzcow ginkyofu13 (Why EDiots are not trolling her already is unknown to scientists) of his latest form.
Noticing this slip, our hero pounced, replying to his message with these magic words.
| —MoarLurk | ||
Three hours after the contact, Gin had hidden the two comments, Blazesonic once again deleted his gallery, and the following comment appeared on his newest fount of faggotry
| —Blazesonic | ||
This will go down as the quickest a tartlet has ever LEFT DA FOREVER.
And, again, did not keep his promise and returned.
The (expected)Return (and retreat)of Blazesonic[edit]
Blazesonic has returned to his account and is still creating more faggotry as time continues. The faggotry must be brought to a screaming, bloody halt, and the cow is ready to be milked once again.
Blazesonic has stated that he will ignore us and says that he'll insult us until the cows come home because we aren't that great, which means he hasn't changed at all with his Anon policy and will probably be trolled off the internets again, hopefully for good.
Destiny:Legend of the Galaxy Star[edit]
Blazesonic is attempting to begin a new series with original characters called Destiny:Legend of the Galaxy Star, a story that seems to star old people with twisted faces and terrible sunburn, as well as a Hunter and two unidentifiable animals.
Blazesonic's characters already display tremendous amounts of Mary Suetonium, with smurfs and terrible spelling.
The main character "Lukas" wears eyeliner like a faggot, with an female-looking statue with no emotion whatsoever, while a random cardboard cutout with the image of a green guy slapped on it stands behind him, who is called Sleezy Sam, with a framed photo with incorrectly portrayed shattered glass, and random aquamarine stripes behind them.
TL;DR
Blaze may have improved in the originality factor, but hardly at all in the skill department. In other words, Blaze has become more adept at hiding his sources, but still sucks.
TL;DR
The firing range is hot.
Sonic the Hedgehog: Shards of Unoriginality[edit]
However, it looks like he has scrapped his idea, and is now doing the same bullshit that he had done from before, as he is making another shitty fanfic based on the equally shit-tastic game "Sonic and the Negro Knight", complete with a new character called "Galactic Sonic".
As expected, Galactic Sonic is basically just Sonic, Shadow and Silver combined together in a giant clusterfuck of gayness and has unoriginality levels that quite possibly may have surpassed his last one.
Universal Man[edit]
After flirting with about a billion original ideas, Blazesonic finally decided to write consistently about his Ben 10 ripoff superhero character Universal Man (Earlier Universal Boy).
After about four chapters, Blazesonic seemed to finally be set on something, and maybe, just maybe, he might actually be transformed into a contributive member of the creative society. Given a few shoves in the right direction, of course.
Of course, since Blazesonic takes criticism just about as well as lead floats, the efforts of those who felt sympathetic to him were fruitless. He refused to acknowledge that other people might not like shitty dialogue and poor grammar, among other things. His defense was that because he liked the stories, it doesn't matter what anybody else thought was wrong with it.
Blazesonic gets hit in the ass by the door[edit]
In an attempt to show us who's in control, Blazesonic posted a journal claiming that all the trolling was doing was strengthening him, and nobody has to listen to well-meant literary criticism, ESPECIALLY HIM, and we're just jealus of his writing skills.
Needless to say, this fountain of bullshit caused everybody who thought he wasn't a lost cause to hate his guts.
| —fakeprofile, giving Blaze advice that he'll never listen to because he's a superhero. | ||
Previous Quote | Next Quote
Bombarded with hate and realizing everybody who pitied him now realized how much of a hopeless, stupid fuck he is, he deleted fucking everything and left. He will be back with renewed bravado, and we will be ready to defeat him once again.
[+]The Erotic Fanfic[edit]
Sonic Thorndyke gripped his keyblade and looked out to the horizon, his furry blue hands shaking with anticipation. It had been months now since he had held the secret that caused him such anxiety, but now he was finally ready to reveal it to his comrades. His eyes welled up with tears as he attempted to cope with the revelation he was about to unleash upon his friends- how long ago had it been since it first manifested itself? It must have been at least half a year ago, when he first met his heroic new friends. First came Bell, the white-haired girl that may or may not have been totally plagiarized from some other terrible fanfic world. Next came Alex, the blonde-haired rogue that was also lifted right off the page of another catastrophically gay fanfic in violation of several major copyright laws.
Sonic himself had been very troubled even before the arrival of these two complete abominations of originality, however...And how could he not be troubled? He could barely even look in the mirror without shedding a tear. He was hideous- it was as if a toddler with an overload of extra hormones had combined the worst things of children's entertainment and spastically drew the result on Microsoft Paint in five minutes. He was so lonely- no other fanfic character would even give him the time of day. Donut would just laugh at him. Marcus wouldn't even give him a speech about using his imagination- it was crushingly depressing. He was alone, pathetic and alone...Until his friends came.
They arrived through some sort of portal in the universe, like a giant hole in a terrible plot. Bell was a sweet girl, and seemed to have an interest in him. And Alex...Sonic smiled. Alex was unlike anyone he ever met. His boyish charms could make him grin childishly on even the most tragic of occasions. Sonic's bright red cheeks blushed even deeper. He would let them know today. He had to. After Sonic had mustered up all of his courage, Alex and Bell arrived- some twisted form of luck, perhaps? Sonic closed his eyes, ran a clumsy, poorly-illustrated hand through his blue fur and sighed..."Guys...Before we go and beat up more children's cartoon characters and squiggly lines that are intended to be monsters, I have something that I need to tell you" Sonic said, his entire body shaking with nervousness now. "I knew you had something on your mind, Sonic...Last time you could barely go Super Saiyan Naruto Bullshit Power Level 9000 when we were fighting the polka-dot squiggly heartless monsters" Bell scoffed. "Hey, go easy on Thorndyke. He's been through a lot. It's not easy, being plagiarized from almost a dozen different original sources. Look at you, you're only stolen from one franchise and you're a complete wreck" Alex shot back, defending Sonic from Bell's harsh tone.
Bell shrank back, obviously hurt. Insulting Sonic was only her way of showing how much...How much she really cared about him. She wanted him more than anything. If he wanted, Sonic could easily be with her...She wondered what his confession was. Sonic cleared his throat and began, his prepubescent voice cracking with anticipation. "W..Well...Y'see...You guys..." he started, stammering wildly..."It's been r-really hard for me to fight alongside you recently...I...I've...I've fallen in love, okay? It's really hard watching you fight heartless and put yourself in danger when I love you....You know who you ar-" at this point, he was cut off by an overjoyed squeal from Bell. "Sonic, I love you too!" she cried, jumping in the air with a huge grin on her delicious loli face.
Sonic's eyes widened with surprise. "What? Not you, you dumb bitch!" He laughed, Alex laughing alongside him. "Why the hell would I want you? Listen, it's been a hard thing for me to admit all these years, but...Well, I'm gay! Alex, all those times I said I was always watching your back...You knew the truth, didn't you!" Sonic said inbetween bouts of laughter. Alex nodded and slapped Sonic on his blue furry ass, taunting the beautiful Bell right in front of her. Sonic responded by wrapping his arms around Alex and pressing his lips against his blonde beau's, his rodent tongue mingling with Alex's. They were making out, slurping tongues and groping each other right in front of Bell! Bell began to cry, and that's when Sonic and Alex turned to face her menacingly...
"What should we do with this useless whore, Alex?" Sonic said, laughing cruelly as he casually slipped a hand beneath Alex's green jersey and gently teasing his nipples with a furry paw. "Mmm...Ooh, I don't know Sonic...Yeah, that's it...A little faster, keep going" Alex moaned, sidetracked by his furry friend's roaming hands. "Should we...should we rape her?" Alex said, licking his lips. "Eww..No way!" Sonic yelped in disgust. "She's a female! Females are only good for one thing...Meals!" Sonic gleefully cackled, pouncing on Bell and knocking her to the floor. In an instant his claws ripped her clothes off, revealing her naked, flat chest, which he happily began to tear open with his bared claws. Meanwhile, Alex had begun to season the girl's remains with his precum, dousing the dying girl with his milky man-chowder. A deathly gurgle escaped what remained of Bell's throat, and her eyes become glassy and blank. She was no more. "Move over Sonic, those new holes you made look fantastic, they're mine now" Alex growled, gently shoving his lover away from the corpse as he found a fresh wound and inserted his penis into it, screaming various obscenities at the corpse as he thrusted against the new orifice. Sonic giggled and went behind Alex, pinching his nipples with his claws until little drops of blood began to surface on Alex's pale prepubescent chest. Sonic gently slid his member inside Alex now, and the two began to match rhythm, Alex grinding his ass against the pelvis of Sonic as Sonic's tiny blue cock worked its way into Alex's asshole.
Alex screamed in delight as he let Sonic have his way for now, still enjoying the fresh corpse before him. "Mmph....This is...this is better than that episode of Invader Zim...When Gir..Oohh..When Gir says he likes...OH GOD YES...He likes...T-t-tacos! YES!" Alex declared, his tender ass bumping against the sweaty sapphire fur of Sonic's pelvis. Sonic began to convulse now, feeling himself close to orgasm- until Alex stopped, standing up now before Sonic. "Mmm, you're going to have to work for your orgasm, love" Alex said seductively, and Sonic instinctively found himself slurping at Alex's tender penis. It wasn't long before Sonic was on all fours like a good Pikachu, letting Alex ravage his ass, pounding away at his anus. The dried fecal matter that had stuck to Sonic's fur began to fall off in crusty flakes on the ground as Alex began to thrust harder and faster, and a trickle of blood ran down Alex's cock now. "Owwww...Please Alex, no more!" Sonic begged, the pain nearly overwhelming him now as he felt a warm, wet sensation build up in his gut. Alex ignored him, however, and it wasn't long before Sonic felt a soaking torrent of liquid feces erupt from his ass. The stress that his secret had created had been too much for his insides to bear, and now the product of all that stress was coating Alex's cock with a putrid brown liquid. "Naughty Pikachu! Looks like you'll have to please me even more now!" Alex said as he took his cock out and inserted a fist, which instantly became coated in diarrhea. Alex punched away at Sonic's sphincter happily, using his clean hand to stroke his cock.
"So....you like shitfisting, do you?" Alex inquired as Sonic neared orgasm....Sonic could do nothing but nod, his teeth clenched together in sheer agony as his asshole began to contract, Alex's prostate punches beginning to stretch his anus to gigantic proportions. More of the wretched liquid shit poured out of Sonic's asshole now like a waterfall as he screamed one final cry of agony, his cock twitching and finally exploding in orgasm right at the moment of prolapse. Massive spurts of semen fell onto the ground at the same moment as Sonic's intestines splattered onto the Earth, and Sonic staggered before finally falling onto his knees, growing weak as the prolapse began to take effect. "Alex...my love..help me..." Sonic rasped, landing on his stomach as he looked up at his lover. Alex looked at what he had done in horror- he had never meant to kill Sonic, only please him! Silently and solemnly, Alex walked over to his clothing and drew a pistol from his pockets, weeping quietly as he witnessed Sonic's last agonized moments. One shot later, Sonic's suffering had ended. The mercy killing was swift. Another shot later, and it was over. The heroes were dead, and the heartless (or whatever plagiarized villain threatened Original Charactersville) were ensured victory. Yet still, among the field of death where Sonic and Alex had embraced one final time, there was hope. Hope that more stupid teenagers would write mangled fanfics. Hope that love could bloom once more, even on the battlefield. With more Kingdom Hearts games on the horizon, the promise of more plagiarized passion filled the onlookers with hope.
Other Retards with Sonic Recolors[edit]
- GyroHedgie453
- 9ishCassie
- MysticArk, O.K., no Sonic recolor, but a similar retard
External Links[edit]
-
Fastest And Newest Abandoned DA accountAppears to have returned, so get trolling <--- Possibly left 4-evar again. - Smackjeeves account
- The comic series he was not in any way ripping off.
|
Blazesonic is part of a series on Visit the DeviantART Portal for complete coverage. |
[GOTTA GO FAST!]
| |||||
|
