DivineAngel

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Divineangel lolcow.jpg This lol-cow is so big, one page is not enough!
Check out some sweet chat logs here!


Divine Angel's self-portrait.
DivineAngel IRL. Man the harpoons!


Divineangelsgod.jpg


DivineAngel, also known by her alias, LadyHisoka, is a whiny lol-cow and Snapesnogger wannabe with the grammatical skills of a monkey. Because DivineAngel is afflicted with a severe case of Stupidity, she is a very easy target to make fun of. She believes that she does not have to follow the rules because she has borderline dyslexia, and she becomes profoundly butthurt whenever she feels that this right is being violated by The Man. Like most Tartlets, Divine loves to post lulzy, incomprehensible journal entries, hide any comment that does not agree with her point of view, and delete her aforementioned journals once the trolls come out to play. However, not content with being just your average drama-prone tartlet, DivineAngel puts an interesting spin on an old tale: she's apparently a witch.

DivineAngel and Witchcraft[edit]

DivineAngel casts a hex on an unsuspecting troll.

DivineAngel identifies herself as a Pagan. A pagan is defined as "a person who is not a Christian, Jew, or Arab." So she could really be anything, but we're going to assume that like most dumbasses on the internet, she thinks it means Wiccan.

Wicca is a hippie religion often taken up by 16 year old girls in order to appear speshul and different from other 16 year old girls. A popular saying that sums up Wiccan ethics is "an it harm none, do what ye will" which means as long as you don't hurt anyone, you can do whatever shit you want to.

Of course, DivineAngel is far too important to follow any silly rules, so she ignores this saying completely and often threatens to hex people. Too bad for her that Wiccans also believe in "the threefold law", which states that if you do something bad to someone, something bad will happen back to you, but three times worse. OH SNAP!

History has shown that the only way to deal with witches is to burn them. While setting fire to her body may in fact be a fun project, ED recommends the burning take the form of pointing out her stupidity in the most lulzworthy ways possible.

Methods can include but are not limited to:

  • Asking how many prints she's sold yet.
  • Telling her the real definition of dyslexia.
  • Commenting with true and useful tips on improving her artwork.
  • Trying to explain that "constructive criticism" doesn't need to have something positive in it.
  • Making fun of her inability to read and follow rules.
  • Leaving so many comments that it's hard for her to hide them all.
  • Correcting her grammar or spelling.
  • Screencapping her stupidity.
  • Telling her Paganism is a fairytalistic religion.
  • Going to her page and letting her know just how retarded she really is.
  • Ask for video proof that she really is an angel and see if she can fly off a building. If not, she fails herself.
  • Talking to her for five consecutive minutes.
  • And adding to this Article.


DivineAngel also often mysteriously refers to some sort of higher beings. Are they her heathen gods? Or... something else?! She also seems to believe that she has magikal majikal powers! We have collected many of these puzzling quotes for your inspection.

  • "DO NOT ever dare attack my original art again little whore, Because it will be of the supernatural that you would to face"
  • "you have no idea the power I have do you."
  • "when will tyou fucking learn KARMA IS REAL! and if you sin in my presence well you are about to find out why im called DivineAngel!"
  • "You badmouthed my friend Belittled me And pissed off a Celestial Alliance, lucky for you they are letting me handle you personally! And don’t think you are going to get off easy."
  • "ALAH HU ACKBAR MAJIK JIHADI!"


What "powers" does she possess? What is this about the "supernatural"? And what exactly is the "Celestial Alliance"? All this and more, in next week's episode!


The Story of DivineLolcow[edit]

DivineAngel assures us that she does not five a dam.
Even $Moonbeam13 thinks DivineAngel is retarded!


   
 
Oh god the spam is still here!!!! WHY AM I THE ONLY ONE THAT CAN SEE IT????


 


 
 

—DivineAngel, on seeing shit others can't

DivineAngel's rampage of lulz began long ago, when fellow DeviantART user MarieChan told DivineAngel that she would not be able to earn $200 a month by selling her shitty prints. In response, DivineAngel promptly flipped a shit, completely trashing the forums and posting whiny journals in response to this painful truth. People soon after discovered the bountiful lulz she provided and flocked to her page.

Without delay, DivineAngel was assaulted from all sides as people relentlessly poked fun at the heffer. DivineAngel would often fight back with vicious and biting words like in this post, where she complains that someone was stealing her original character and thus was performing "copyright enfrigemnet."

It was a trap, you guys![edit]

After her ED article went up, DivineAngel quickly scoffed at all those that opposed her. For you see, all the raging was, in fact, a trap! That's right! As it turns out, all this was just an elaborate ploy by DivineAngel to bring all the trolls on the site to the attention of the DeviantART Staff! Unfortunately for DivineAngel, the DA Staff doesn't give a shit about DeviantART and her little "plan" failed. Here are some quotes from straight from the lol-cow herself:


   
 
we have been trying this for a long time since before you knew us this all was a TRAP
 

 
 

—Oh no! Not a TRAP!

   
 
Congrats you LULZ scum you fell right into the trap!
 

 
 

—Oh the humanity!

   
 
I haev to thank the LULZ for falling so willingly into this little Trap! NOW all that is left if for the Deviant Staff to sort out the ones they don't want here and the ones that are just curious and brave.
 

 
 

—Could this be the end of The LULZ!?

   
 
and well said my dear but I must reveal that it was indeed a set up! we lined em up like little ducks for the staff here. Anti Idiot has been trying to kill lulz for 10 years now, or at least reveal their true colors.
 

 
 

—Fun fact: DivineAngel likes to play Duck Hunt.

   
 
I have to thank all you ducks for lining up like good little mallards!
 

 
 

—Still going on about the fucking ducks...

   
 
NO more off topic posting our mission is a success, we have all the screen shots we will ever need. thanks to Divine Angel's effort, we now know the lulz are a bunch under-age hoodlums that think violating ethnic standers is "cool" any help in bringing the full party of the lulz to justice will be appreciated.
 

 
 

—DivineAngel, pretending to be someone else. Apparently the under-age hoodlums are violating ethnic standers.

   
 
Oh Anti Idiot set up a trap for lulz but it appears the DA staff isn't interested in removing them from the sight.
 

 
 

—MISSION FAILED


And so, it had seemed that DivineAngel was very close to eradicating the vicious band of unethnical hoodlums known as the LULZ. A close call, for sure.

That's ENOUGH[edit]

Miraculously, while Divine actually did spell "foul" the correct way, it's still a funny pun.

Some time after the whole "It was a trap!" drama, DivineAngel was thrusted back into the spotlight after she posted the following journal entry, bitching because one of her Kingdom Hearts fanarts was removed for being pornographic. Although the image itself was softcore, the dumbshit completely broke the DeviantART policy on pornographic images by drawing a condom in Sora's mouth, with condoms being considered a "sex toy" and thus a big no-no on DeviantART. In the journal, she refers to the admins as "idiots" even though she would later try to elicit help from them to get rid of Encyclopedia Dramatica and the trolls.


DivineAngel has had enough of this faggotry!


Although the rule that a condom is considered a sex toy was indeed a rather nonsensical one, it was still a rule at the time, and DivineAngel broke it. And she thinks it's okay to break the rules because she has dyslexia and can't read them.

During the events of July 24th, the admins of DeviantART found her ED page and began to see why she was so popular. Realizing just how moronic the rule was, they decided to rewrite the rules as they saw fit in order to save their asses. Gg, DA staff.

Lolsuit Threats[edit]

About one week after the condom incident, DivineAngel updated her journal informing her fans and haters that she was planning to file a lolsuit against Encyclopedia Dramatica for "deformation of character." Users were quick to call her bluff because they knew that DivineAngel does not have the brain capacity to open the Yellow Pages and call a lawyer.

 
 
Well this is an amusing story, I was making lunch and I got a call from a Lawyer from out of town. I‘m sure you guys are aware that I have been researching the topic of Encyclopedia Drematica, misquotes and dramatizations.

It turns out when I told Vlad about the d-boards removal he was trying to target members of E.D. in attempts to show them how it felt to their unfortunate victims he is sorry if any one who wasn’t a member wound up in the crossfire.

As for E.D. it turns out THEY ARE NOT protected under the first amendment rights act mainly for misquotes and Deformation of character. Because they have world wide audiences they are actually subject to worse rules than the magazines or papers.

Now I still have to get my dads opinion in the matter in fact I know hes got a reliable Lawyer on speed dial for work purposes since some retailers have taken to wanting to target him when the accountant screws up.

(update)

Just got off the phone to see my options, and I have a announcement to make From now on I'm running a Smear against E.D. Just because they are overseas DOES NOT exempt them from using standard moral practices!

that whatever government decided to protect them might want to think again. Americans have rights and other country's should respect throws rights eve if they don't wish to practice them them selfs.
 


 

—"The lawyer," Journal Entry: Wed Jul 18, 2007, 6:17PM

Later, DivineAngel edited the journal to reveal to everyone that the EDiots had fallen right into her trap! That's right folks, ED has been fooled again! Surely, DivineAngel is the greatest troll in the world!


   
 
Wow you guys have got to be kidding me? and you called me gullible one.

The call was to inform me that my brothers case was taken care of and they wanted me to relay the message.

as for the rest of it gee who's laughing now?
 


 
 

—DivineAngel, who was so misguided that she thought ED actually took her seriously.


   
 
HAHAHAH you think I would use a lawyer for something that is best solved by the hand of the supernatural you fools have given me all I need!
 

 
 

—DivineLolcow

The Journal Rape of July 24th[edit]

IT'S OVER NINE THOUSAAAANNNNDDD!!1
Her response to theraid, which was later raided then BALEETED.

On July 23rd, DivineAngel's page became a Featured Article here at Encyclopedia Dramatica, thereafter solidifying DivineAngel's status as a grade-A lol-cow. In response to this, Divine posted a journal the next day stating that she and her "friend," Tsuki, mooned the EDiots on her forum (which iz ironic cuz "tsuki" is japanese for moon lolz isn't i funneh guise?). DivineAngel then celebrated her victory with her imaginary friend by turning on Tsuki's vibrating function. Because DivineAngel has no friends, noone read her journal entry...that is, until two really awesome people, who went by the usernames Whuzzup and RetardSmasher started to spam the hell out of her journal and main page. Their efforts managed to propel Divine's journal to the "most popular" journal spot in DeviantArt, garnering it plenty of more attention. Eventually, the admins took notice of the brutal assrape going on and forced Divine to delete the journal entry. When all was said and done, the deleted journal entry had over ten thousand comments and the damage to her main page was irreparable.

It was my roommate! Honest![edit]

Nice try, DivineAngel.

During the Summer 2007, DivineAngel came up with yet another brilliant idea: "If people thought that everything that happened was done by an impostor, then I'll be off the hook for all the shit I've done!" That's right, folks. DivineAngel played the blame game and pointed the finger at her "room-mate" for everything that had happened over the summer of 2007. All the asshattery, the hexing, the curses, the butthurt, all of it was the work of Mystery Roommate X while the REAL DivineAngel was away at "cleansing."


Room-mate, yeah right, fucking liar.png


The best part about this whole thing is the fact that DivineAngel tries to convince everyone that this is her and not Mystery Roommate X by having perfect spelling and halfway-decent grammar. Of course, it was pretty obvious that Mystery Roommate X and DivineAngel are one in the same, as when she began to respond to the comments in her journal she gradually started sounding more like this mystery roommate. DivineAngel realized at the time that her cries of "My roommate was doing all of this plz stop" were not getting through to The LULZ, so she deleted her journal and took a short leave of absence from the internet to think of a better excuse.

Even $Lolly gets in on the action!

Not too long after the roommate scandal, DivineAngel cranked the faggotry up to eleven by posing as her "roommate". She opened up a new account called LadyHisoka claiming to be DivineAngel's roommate, but LadyHisoka's horrendous mutilation of the English language and the fact that LadyHisoka has the same birthday as DivineAngel helped to uncover the ruse. Realizing that the jig was up, DivineAngel immediately shifted the blame away from her roommate and started blaming hackers for what had happened.

The Grand Finale[edit]

DivineConfessions.jpg

Not satisfied with the conclusion of the LadyHisoka Saga, DivineAngel decided that ENOUGH WAS ENOUGH and that it was time to fight back by waging war against the trolls with her army of sockpuppets, including LadyHisoka and a new account created specifically for this epic battle: ScarletDivine. DivineAsshole used the ScarletDivine account to inform people that the DivineAngel account was being hijacked by LadyHisoka, her "roommate." Soon the trolls came out of the woodwork, and over the next few days flames were thrown around, accusations of asshattery were made, and many trolls were felled at the hands of the witch. Many valiant trolls were banned by the admins after everything was said and done, and DivineAngel declared her victory by telling everyone that she was experimenting with trolling. A laughable excuse, if anything.

TheDivineUltimatum.jpg
DA leaving her acocunt as a warning for the generations to come


In the end, DivineAngel decided to leave DA forever. DivineAngel honestly believed that she had won the war, for the trolls were all gone and her efforts were nothing more than a big joke, but little did DivineLolcow know that it would be the trolls, and ED, who would have the last laugh: shortly after this incident, the DivineAngel and LadyHisoka accounts were banned, and with it a great era in internets history ended...

...Or did it?

Quotes[edit]

DivineAngels say the darndest things! Here are some of the gems we've seen over the years...

   
 

"That is a violation of ethnic standers!"
 


 
 

—- A classic

   
 

"This sight is filled to the brim with imbeciles!"
 


 
 

—- Eyesight

   
 

"the world dosent revolv around your penus!"
 


 
 

—- Meatspin

   
 

"when will tyou fucking learn KARMA IS REAL! and if you sin in my presence well you are about to find out why im called DivineAngel!"
 


 
 

—-Karmic Law

   
 

"you can’t look at it and see what you want, you have to see what’s there and the flaws are part of the artwork."
 


 
 

—- TR00 ARTZ

   
 

"Let me tell you somethign If i had such ignorance i would haev comitted sucide a long time ago."
 


 
 

—-Good reasons to kill herself

   
 

"DO NOT ever dare attack my original art again little whore, Because it will be of the supernatural that you would to face"
 


 
 

—-Little whores

   
 

"You badmouthed my friend Belittled me And pissed off a Celestial Alliance, lucky for you they are letting me handle you personally! And don’t think you are going to get off easy."
 


 
 

—-That's the power of Paganism

   
 

"If you can't make a valid point perhaps you shouldn't post! I sentience ye to the pits of the nine, may you whiteness their horrors each night till sunrise. Be this your punishment till you learn to act more accordingly."
 


 
 

—-Sin and Punishment

   
 

"you have no idea the power I have do you."
 


 
 

—-Power.

   
 

"people if you are goign ot fuck with someone out of Spyte DO NOT FUCK WITH ME! its a very bad idea fopr more than just I dont have to use the sight to reak havoc with your plains. Also little brat plesant dreams... I curse you! you will now feel the pain you inflict on all life as if it was your own! Enjoy!"
 


 
 

—-LOL WUT

   
 

"OMFG I have screenshots that may bust soemone so bad it isn't funny screenshots that feature art predating the apperince IN JAPAN of certin silver, gold, and crystal version pokemon! can we say someone got buisted!"
 


 
 

—- Pokeymans

   
 

"a flame is a insult no matter how you decide to suagr-coat it, is not proper Critique, and only exists for one purpuse. now the definition say the same basic thing AND nor or AND meanign if you cant say anything good its a flame and there fore not nessary, if you cant say anthign bad its a compliment eather way you spread this it dosent matter much the definitions are clear how people can confuse them or see whats not ther eis beyond me."
 


 
 

—- AND nor or AND

   
 

"You are a pawn, and you are trying to take a creator beyond your comprehension."
 


 
 

—-DivineAngel, channelling God

   
 

"heres a hint when 2 and 2 don't make 4 look for the missing number."
 


 
 

—- Logic

   
 

"Opions make horrible critisisum because its YOUR opion, this does not mean that others share the same vew on it."
 


 
 

—-DivineAngel, on people's opions

   
 

"You want to talk about horrible art At least I try and add soem cilility and class to my design."
 


 
 

—-Adding soem cilility

   
 

"Go fuck a tree perhaps you will feel better!"
 


 
 

—-DivineAngel, on Arborphillia

   
 

"But Thats life, and its hard to make lemon-aid when someone keeps dumping the pitcher."
 


 
 

—-LemonAIDS

   
 

"Oh I'm sorry MINORS aren't allowed to comment!"
 


 
 

—-Children


   
 

"May the spirits of the dead rip you asunder you vile beast!"
 


 
 

—-DivineAngel, on Hell

   
 

"And i thought you knew, I don't play fair when I make a smear, but I do play by the proper rules."
 


 
 

—-Playing fair

   
 

"your idea of weak is flawed."
 


 
 

—-Flaws

   
 

"I DO NOT support ED articles as they are filled to the brim with misquotes and ethnic violations."
 


 
 

—-Ethnic Violations

   
 

"Speritualist Empath, and let me tell you for the rumor that the computer protects you from everything; well when you see what I do you tend to understand that Words are one thing but Intentions can never be hidden."
 


 
 

—- Wait, whut

   
 
"

I actually can't make prints here because every time i try i get that freak squad breathing down my thought.”
 


 
 

—-Why her prints don't sell

   
 

"Don't mess with America."
 


 
 

—- A Pagan, a Retard, a Patriot

   
 

"Why would a mere child know about something i spent my whole life devolved in?"
 


 
 

—-Talent

   
 

"I should also add they the "law" says nothing about the events that will soon topple the ed empire."
 


 
 

—-Law

   
 

"you have serious mantle issues!"
 


 
 

—- Architecture.

   
 

"My Prints are more or less targeted to cretin types of buyers"
 


 
 

—-At least she knows her audience

   
 

"Facts the only facts they were presenting were opinions, and that by no stretch of the imagination is critisium."
 


 
 

—-Critisium

   
 

"I need two things for my plains, a forum of identification, a user name works nicely; thou most often a hair or toenail is expressed thou this is genetic or blood soul, and the spell itself."
 


 
 

—-'How to Curse Thought the Internet'

   
 

"Oh but this is just the bigining, dispite sapping every pinney the ED has they will ensure a "copycat" never appers by taking it opon themself to SMEAR the living hell out of that kinda of humor!"
 


 
 

—- tl;dr

   
 

"Anti- spam request plez!"
 


 
 

—- DivineAngel, now in Lolcat form!

   
 

"i got skilz k?"
 


 
 

—- She's got mad skillz

   
 

"Don't you guys get it THIS IS revenge YOU fucked with my forum now I'M fucking with you. Oh but I'm not done yet I have the most lovely parting gift for you and your foul spiritualists a "Dance of elders" and since they plucked my mind knowing of a simple spell as this is no huge task!however they have not the means to retaliate this one and it DOES hit hard! basically I'm a shamed of you you think you would have asked Zyphen my habits in highschool"
 


 
 

—- Again, what the fuck?

   
 
“Its obvious that people have been ignoring ED fro too long!”
 

 
 

—-Hair styling

   
 

"let me tell ya something YOU HAVEN'T SEEN DRAMA you assholes want drama ohh boi I can't because YOU CANT HANDLE DRAMA"
 


 
 

—- Drama

   
 

"DO NOT BE A GRAMMER NATI ABOUT THIS!"
 


 
 

—- Grammer Nazism


   
 

"ATTENTION ALL SATINISTS THIS WANNABE HIGH PRIEST FORGOT TO PAY HOMAGE TO HIS SACRIFICES NEUTRALITY BEFORE COMMITTING THEM THUS THEY WERE UNFIT AND AS SUCH HE IS NOW OPEN TO YOUR LOVELY CARE."
 


 
 

—-Capslock. Also, satin.

   
 

" Get a life lousier!"
 


 
 

—-Lousiers

   
 

"You were blocked before have the balls to stay blocked you whore!"
 


 
 

—-Having balls

   
 

"you need to learn to shit the fuck up!!!"
 


 
 

— -Niche porn

   
 

"This is about something that has been classified as Tabooed in the art filed."
 


 
 

—-Taboos

   
 

"and for the idiot that called me a heretic, I have NEVER drawn hate art towards or of another artist., I never go personal when someone acts like a complete immature child."
 


 
 

—-Kettle, meet Pot

   
 

"Its plagerism more tabooed than childpron, and only because some country's don't think twice about the later."
 


 
 

—- Plagerism; worse than CP

   
 

"NO correcting other members spelling as it WILL be considered Trolling."
 


 
 

—-Spelling

   
 

"Im going ot make you look like a ocmplete and tostal imbicvel here."
 


 
 

—- What she's good at.

   
 

"I have cretin appointments that I can't miss"
 


 
 

— -Cretin appointments


Gallery[edit]

Various Screencaps About missing Pics
[Collapse GalleryExpand Gallery]


[Collapse GalleryExpand Gallery]

External Links & Current Status[edit]

DivineAngel / LadyHisoka moved to Tumblr. Same monkey-like gramma, same severe case of stupidity, less funny art and more YELLS IN ALL CAPS ABOUT BITCHES.

  • Loveismysword Her "True Anti-Hate blog", used for hate and general asslicking. ACTIVE
  • Crownedclowngirl The first of a shit load of shitty tumblr blogs, still has her "art" on it. ACTIVE
  • Fallennobility Another shitty tumblr blog she uses like LadyHisoka- to kiss her own ass. BALEETED
  • abyssmalsavior Yet ANOTHER shitty tumblr blog, cries about timelines no one gives a fuck about. BALEETED
  • Demifiend-hitoshura This tumblr blog puppets the previous one, bitching about the same shit and pretending still to be different people. BALEETED



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DivineAngel is part of a series on

DeviantART

Visit the DeviantART Portal for complete coverage.

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DivineAngel

is part of a series on

Taking Down ED

[Retreat!Do It Faggot]

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DivineAngel


is part of a series on
y!Faggotry

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Nazis:

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Events:

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Retarded Faggots:

Bubs4696DivineAngelimagec0rrupt3dKiminess
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Featured article July 23, 2007
Preceded by
Harry Potter
DivineAngel Succeeded by
Mary Moon