Ryan
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This person has Assburgers Syndrome, so you can't say anything bad! :-( Be aware of that, you insensitive fuck. |
Ryan "DDoS King" Cleary is the 19 year old leader of Anonymous and master hacker who was apprehended by police after attacking government websites, despite the fact that his DOX were plastered across the internet. He began his journey into the secretive criminal underground by construing a botnet with a group of hillbillies and proceeding to DDoS 4chan, 7chan, 420chan, and Encyclopedia Dramatica. These attacks, along with the following ones on anyone who mentioned it, would not be possible if it were not for the large amount of time on his hands he had after dropping out of the school of an hero at the age of 10. This type of failure seems to be a hereditary trait, as his mother only communicates through writing some sort of illegible caveman-speak, and his brother was busted by the fuzz after he was caught growing thousands of dollars worth of pot in their residential home. It is a known fact that more crime occurs in Momma Cleary's basement than in all of the Bronx.
Contents
On Encyclopedia Dramatica[edit]
Although he was instrumental in helping to bring back ED after DeHippo tried to murder it, his time on ED was limited. He was too busy huffing butane to take care of a website, even if it is filled with retards and requires minimal upkeep. He would check on the forums every few days, securing them with the unbreakable mysql password niggers1 and proceed to go back to playing Minecraft. Everything else was left up to e and zaiger, who spent months cleaning up after him like a new puppy that still shits all over the house.
Vanned[edit]
On June 21, 2011, the British party van paid Ryan a visit in coordination with FBI's LulzSec witch hunt. Although Ryan was not a member of the group, he was responsible for hosting their IRC channel, and thus an enabler, in the same way that AT&T is singlehandedly responsible for every crime planned via telephone. He was also responsible for several DDoSes and had an xbox-hueg botnet consisting of 50 extra-large AWS instances, which he geniously had in his own name. Five charges have been brought against him under the computer misuse act, with the possibility of him being extradited to the United States. This news devastated his family, who believed he had spent the past four years in his room playing video games [1].
And yes, the old media went crazy. They actually went to the trouble to mention that he has Assburgers, probably so they can make fun of aspies later. The Party Van was the one who diagnosed him. It's like they were asking for them to use it as a defense.
Surprisingly, Encyclopedia Dramatica was never mentioned, even though it's the only thing he was ever close to being a "mastermind" of.
Ryan has a girlfriend who also is a basement dweller. They're forever alone... together.
Videos[edit]
Previous Video | Next Video
Huffing the Jenk[edit]
Ryan is also of aboriginal decent, as illustrated in the videos below.
Quotes[edit]
| —Ryan's mom | ||
Previous Quote | Next Quote
Gallery[edit]
Ryan at age 13, coping with his mundane life after his failed suicide attempt three years earlier.
Ryan's bedroom, complete with cat and ghetto cooling system. No tissues however, must be a tube-sock kinda guy. The cat's name is Columbus, named for the eurofag that killed over 9000 Injuns.
Ryan's mom, pictured on the left.
Pictured: Thulsa Doom
Another photo of Ryan's home.
Ryan's deadbeat dad, Jewing it up.
Ryan now serves as a poster child for why inhalant abuse is bad.
Photos of his mother reveal her resemblance to Sherrod.
Depiction of Ryan in Internet court.
Ryan during filming on Fashion From Hell.
Ryan was last spotted chillin' in the back seat
See also[edit]
External links[edit]
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Ryan is part of a series on Visit the Softwarez Portal for complete coverage. |
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Ryan is part of a series on Aspies. | [Sperg out] |
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| Ryan is part of a series on "Leaders" of Anonymous
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INDIVIDUALS Barrett Brown | Darr | Eric Bauman | Jackal | KYAnonymous | Magoo | moot | Neuro | Paul "Fetch" Carnes | r3x | Rfjason | Rorschach | Ryan | Sabu | Splongcat | The Gentleman | WBM | zaiger FACTIONS |
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