The Great Em/b/assy Security Leak of 2007

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Warning!
International government hacking is SRS BIZZNS!~!!@!~#

The Great Em/b/assy Security Leak of 2007: Proof that foreign diplomats don't know shit about security.

On August 30, 2007, a grey-hat hacker named Dan Egerstad stumbled upon at least 100 different login pages for various e-mail accounts of embassies around the world. Oh, also their screen names and passwords. Realizing that he was already shitfucked on an international level from this point, he decided it would be a good idea to post them on the internet for all to enjoy.

Inevitably, Anonymous quickly swept this info up and, as Anonymous is wont to do, unleashed all hell and gleefully prepared to jump-start a World War Three for the lulz.

The Post[edit]

Crikey!

Around 4AM CST, the URLs, Logins, and passwords for (among others) the Japanese, Indian and Hong Kong embassies, and the Office of the Dalai Lama were posted on 4chan's /b/ imageboard, spanning at least four full posts of info. No doubt this was optimum timing for /b/'s script kiddies, as the mods were all tuckered out from their daily rituals and sleeping soundly. The post ballooned as every underage b& and their mother rushed to try out these shiny new codes and get their shit ruined by international law.

Info was also quickly pasted to 7chan and 420chan's i, but in a rare moment of sobriety, 420chan decided not to touch this shit with a ten-foot pole. (Really? You think? Well, I prefer not to get v& at the moment, so I think I'll sit this one out, guys.)

The Drama[edit]

Well hello there, Mr. President of the NAACP.

Within minutes, people were going to town with the illegal info. Stupid faggots who have obviously never learned not to mess with football were having the times of their lives logging in, shooting off emails (mainly consisting of HAI GAIZ MONGOLIA LURVZ MUDKIPZ), and taking screenshots for lulz like so many little kids in their big sister's bras.

It was paradise for /b/tards in its highest form, and for once, the coveted ideal of the Internet Hate Machine had condensed into a swirling pool of international mayhem. All at once, posters began spouting off talk of a revolution, and an exile of the newfags through the infamy of their little exploits with the Kazakhstan government. Even through the omnipresent bitching about whether or not the information was real, 4chan's posters had worked themselves up into a manic frenzy. That is, until they realized this was a little illegal.

Maybe too illegal.

Yep, believe it or not, messing with international governments is an offense of a bit higher gravity than CP.

The "Oh shi--" Moment[edit]

Plz halp, Mr. Vice President.

Pretty soon /b/tards were freaking out all over the place having realized that their pathetic little script kiddie proxies wouldn't do shit against the government's IP trackers. Even more lulzy were the few poor souls who, in their zeal, had neglected to use a proxy at all.

That's when 4chan's more experienced hackers came out of the woodwork to have a good laugh at their shit-fucked little colleagues and to lecture them on how you should, again, NEVER MESS WITH FOOTBALL. Yet even the most jaded of the bunch could not help but feel pity for the witless newfags, some going as far as to help delete traces (or, mostly, to tell them they were pretty much fagbait at this point.)

The thread maxed out and was deleted, then was revived and deleted again (presumably by mods). The mirror on 4chanarchive was available for a good twenty-four hours, but was taken down after the mods decided international hacking didn't present the best image of their site. All that remains currently are a few scraps left on 420chan, and the memories of those /b/tards lucky enough to witness it. The ones who weren't v&, that is.

How do I deleted System32?[edit]

We knew it'd be you in the end, /b/.

Insofar as can be divulged, the majority of Anonymous were let off easy and didn't get apprehended, because nobody gives a shit about Uzbekistan anyway. This is too bad, because 4chan could always do with a few less newfags.

As for the OP of the thread, and those few stupid enough to send emails... their security is unconfirmed. (As of the writing of this article, the story is still in progress.)